Fifty Shades of a Drunken Mistake
by KMSxoxo
Summary: Remember when Ana drunk dialed Christian? What if the night took a turn and they woke up married? Not eligible for an annulment, they agree to spend the 6 month waiting period before filing for divorce together, portraying newlyweds in public, they are strangers in private. Will love find a way, or will they walk away? (THERE WILL BE HEA)
1. Chapter 1

**APOV**

"Are you sure?'' he asks, hovering over me, only centimeters from my entrance, but I'm not backing out now. This is it, it's happening now.

''Yes'' I breath out, ''Christian, please.''

''You're so beautiful, Ana'' he whispers. ''I'm sorry,'' he says as he slams into me. I cry out as the feeling of him ripping through my virginity hits me. When he's all the way in, he stills and looks down at me, his eyes dark and filled with lust. He opens his mouth and his breathing is harsh ''you're so tight'' he grunts. ''Are you okay?'' I nod, my eyes wide, He continue looking down at me without moving, letting me get used to him inside me. ''I'm going to move now, baby,'' he says and oh so slowly he eases back until he's almost completely out, before slamming back into me again. I cry out a second time, and he stills once again.

He looks at me asking with his eyes, if he can move. ''Yes,'' I gasp out. He's breathing harshly, and groans. He eases back in, with the same slowness, and I groan while my body gets used to him.

''Again?'' he breaths and I nod with a little smile tugging at the sides of my mouth. He lean down and give me a sweet kiss, before he eases back out. This time he doesn't still when he get in all the way again, he moves slowly at first, looking into my eyes. He continues to ease himself in and out of me, and when I get used to him, my hips start to follow his rhythm. He speeds up, and I moan as he slams into me. I am meeting his relentless thrusts. He leans down again and this time kisses me hard, pulling and nibbling on my lower lip.

My body starts to quiver. I didn't know it would feel this good, I never thought it would feel like this, I stiffen. ''Come for me, Ana'' he whisper breathlessly into my ear, and I explode around him as I climax_. ''Ana!''_ He calls out as he comes, thrusting harder then stilling inside me as he empties himself.

I'm panting and trying to slow down my breathing. I can't hear anything other than my thumping heart. _Wow_, that was beyond anything I ever imagined it would be like. I open my eyes and his eyes are closed as he gets his breathing under control. He open his eyes, and look down at me, leaning down to gently give me a kiss, as he eases himself out of me.

I wake up and my head hurts like hell, and it also hurt… _there,_ with my eyes barely open I take a look around, trying to figure out where I am. I don't see anything familiar with this place, _shit! _What happened last night? I remember drunk dialing Christian, and then I think I walked outside. But what happened outside?

I take a look at the nightstand and there's a glass of orange juice and Advil beside it. I take it and lay back down, burrowing my head down into the pillow, as I try to remember.

_Yes!_ I walked out and then I talked to Jose, what happened so? Shit! He tried to kiss me, and that's when Mr. Grey pushed him off me. Christian came! What happened next? I remember Jose walking back inside after I almost threw up all over him. But then Christian helped me to the side of the parking lot, and I continued to puke more. How _embarrassing!_

Then he offered to drive me home, but I said no. And I'm not home now, so where am I, did he drive me here?

* * *

><p>''<em>Anastasia, <em>wait_!'' I hear Christian shout after me, and I giggle as I walk as fast as I can back to the bar. The room is lit up in many different colors, and it's quite dizzying. I feel someone grab my upper arm, and I turn around to look into gray fierce eyes. ''Anastasia, you need to go home. Let me drive you.''_

''_Come on, Christian'' I whine ''have some fun, take a drink with me.'' He narrows his eyes at me, looking up and down at what I'm wearing and I start to feel self conscious. He shakes his head and tries to drag me out of the bar. ''Christian,'' I whine again ''one drink, please? I had coffee with you, please have a drink with me.'' I blink up at him sweetly, and he rolls his eyes. _

''_One drink, Ms. Steele and then we're leaving.'' He says as he guides me over to bar, his hand on my lower back. I feel goose bump all the way up to my neck, at his touch. He orders one drink for himself and then one to me without asking what I want. _

_I look around the pub, expecting to see if his big security guy is somewhere, but I don't see him. Christian hands me my drink and guides me to an empty table. I look around looking for Kate and to see what happened with Jose. I can't see Jose anywhere, and Kate is dancing with a cute blond guy. I turn around to look at Christian, and just as I've turned my head, his lips are on mine. _

_He coaxes my mouth open with his tongue, and I let out a moan, his tongue exploring my mouth and my tongue quickly begins stroking his back. My hands go immediately to his soft hair, and he's grasping my chin with one hand, and the other hand at the nape of my neck. We pull back breathlessly when someone stomps in my chair. Christian is looking at me with hooded dark eyes. _

''_I think we need one more drink,'' he says._

* * *

><p>So one drink weren't just one drink? The cute blond guy that Kate danced with turned out to be Christian's big brother Elliot. We all sat around and drank for a while. Then my memories are clouded again. What happened? Jose went home with a redhead, without a word or anything he left looking pissed.<p>

Kate went home with Elliot, to our place I think; did I go home with Christian? I sit up in bed and look under the covers, I'm completely naked._ I had sex with Mr. Grey? _And I can't remember? I wasn't saving myself for marriage, but I always thought I was at least going to remember my first time. And to have it with someone I trusted and loved. _But Mr. Grey wow! Well done, Steele,_ I can hear Kate say already.

* * *

><p><em>Christian and I sit by the table and we're on our 5<em>_th__ drink now. We've talked and kissed, and he could he would push me back and be on me in seconds. I know he wants to, he told me so after our third drink. And I want that too, badly. God, at this moment I want nothing more._

''_We just got married!'' someone shouts as they walk in the door. They look happily at each other, and kiss. ''Isn't my wife stunning?'' He asks as he twirls her around, making her laugh and shriek. _

''_Awww, how romantic,'' I gush over the sight of the two of them. They're so cute, and they look so in love with each other. I want that, I want to have someone to come to; someone who loves me like a husband loves his wife. Someone who would show me every day how much he appreciates me, ''I want a husband.'' I whisper. _

''_Let's get married'' Christian whispers in my ear._

* * *

><p>No! Surely that didn't happen. CEO Christian Grey would never do anything like that, would he? We were obviously drunk, no one would marry us. No we're not married, we can't be.<p>

I hear muffled voice in the hall, getting louder and louder. The door is thrown open, and Christian is standing there, with fury in his eyes. ''Just get the fucking lawyer here, now!'' he growls in the phone before looking at me.

_Oh shit, we got married last night. _


	2. Chapter 2

**ANA**

I feel vulnerable, uncomfortable, and small under his angry stare. I really can't describe the way he's looking at me, like I just murdered his first born child or something. I clutch the covers tight over my breast, not wanting him to see me naked. He sighs, and then walks over to get something from his suitcase. He has a document in his hand, and he sits down beside me on the bed.

''I need you to sign this'' he says, giving me the document and a pen, ''it's a non disclosure agreement, whatever is going on between us now, you can't discuss with the media or anyone. Everything will stay between us,'' he says and he doesn't go away before I sign the contract. He takes it in his hands and walks over to the door. ''There's breakfast out here, you should eat something. There's a lawyer on his way, get dressed.'' Then he walks out.

I get up and see at the foot of the bed, there are new clothes. New underwear, panties and a matching bra, did Christian buy me this? I hope not. There's a pair of jeans and a hoody. The comfortable look I love. I walk in the shower to take a quick shower, I feel sticky all over.

* * *

><p>I get dressed and walk out to the main room where there's food everywhere. It looks like he ordered everything on the menu. Well he can afford it, so he probably did. I sit down, and bite in a croissant, letting out a moan at the delicious taste. I close my eyes enjoying it. When I open my eyes again, Christian is sitting in front of me. He has a small smirk on his face while he still looks pissed off. He's about to say something when there's a knock on the door.<p>

''That'll be the lawyer,'' he says and I straighten up in the chair I'm sitting in, while Christian answers the door. He's gone a second, and then he walks back with a young man in a suit, probably in his thirties. ''Ana this is Mr. Brown, he will help us with this mess… and this is Anastasia…'' he says gesturing to me, ''my wife'' he frowns, before sitting down beside me.

''Nice to meet you Mrs. Grey,'' he says as he sits in front of us, getting some folders out of his job case. ''So, if I understood correctly you want an annulment?'' He asks, and we both nod. He takes out a notepad and pen from his brief case, before setting it down. ''Okay, let's see what we can do… You need a legal reason to have your marriage declared invalid.'' He says, and we both nod again. ''Either one of you underage?''

''No,'' we both answer at the same time.

''Do either one of you have another living husband or wife?'' he asks, and we both answer no again. ''Are you close family?'' And we answer no again. ''Were one of you coerced into getting married?'' And we shake our head. I have no idea if this is going good or bad. But by the look on Christian's face, it's bad. ''What about fraud? Did one of you defrauded the other about something essential to the marriage?'' He asks looking directly at Christian.

''NO,'' he answered harshly.

''Physical abuse? Threats?'' And he gets another shake of our heads. ''Is either one of you struggling with insanity? That would mean that one of you were mentally unable to consent to a marriage.''

''I will not stand in front of a judge and say I am mentally unstable. I have a business to run, people who are counting on me.'' Christian says and looks down at me.

''I'm soon graduating college, I'm on job hunting, so I will not do that either.'' I say, crossing my arms and look up at Christian with a raised eyebrow.

''What can we do?'' He asks, and turns his attention back to the lawyer.

''Your marriage is not invalid, or forced. You both agreed to get married, so I suggest file for a divorce. But you just got married, so you have to wait 6 months before you can file for one. I'm sorry Mr. Grey there's nothing I can do here…'' he looks sympathetically at me, with an apologetic smile, ''Can I suggest marriage counseling? I could recommend someone, or are you really sure divorce is the right decision for you?''

''Yes,'' Christian grits out, ''there's nothing I could do? Money's not a problem I'll give you anything.'' He says sitting forward in his chair resting his arms on his thighs.

''It's the law Mr. Grey, money can't change that. I'm sorry.'' Mr. Brown stayed a little bit, handing over some documents for us to read, and then Christian literally pushed him out the door, pissed as hell. Christian hasn't stopped pacing the floor since the lawyer went, mumbling things I can't understand under his breath, switching from English to French a few times, his hand never leaving his hair.

''You should tell your dad,'' he says as he sits down on the floor.

''Why would I do that?'' I ask, shocked. Why would I call my father and tell him I just decided out of the blue to get married? It would kill him, he would be so disappointed in me, I'm better than that.

''Well I'm handing out your diploma at your graduation, and we don't want him to have a heart attack when I call you Anastasia Grey and not Anastasia Steele.'' Shit, I didn't think of that.

''Not everyone changes their names when they get married,'' I say ''I'm not changing it.'' He takes out a folded document from his back pocket, looking through them before handing one of the pages to me.

''It's in process right this moment, you signed under that,'' he says pointing at the paper, ''you obviously agreed yesterday to change your name… So this is how I see this working out,'' he says and sit down on the sofa beside me entwining his hands together. ''We're married, there's nothing we can do about that before it has gone 6 months. You're moving to Seattle right?'' He asks, and I nod my head. ''So you'll move in with me, you'll get your own room, and you can do whatever you want with it, and we wait out those months, before filing for the divorce and going our separate ways.'' He says.

''What? Move in with you?'' I'm moving in with Kate, we're moving to Seattle together that was the plan; we have an apartment arranged and all.

''Yes, we won't tell anyone about the divorce, except my staff. But in everyone else's eyes we are married for real.'' He says looking me straight in the eyes, his expression unreadable. He has the best poker face I've ever seen. ''Think of it like acting, you'll join me at a few advents, dinner meetings, and when we're ''home'' we don't even have to talk to each other.'' His idea is not tempting at all. He sighs as he understands I'm not aboard on his plan. ''Please, you'll get a place to live, I have a housekeeper who will give you whatever you want, food and she cleans up. You'll be living in Seattle it's inventible that we won't see each other.''

''Fine.'' I roll my eyes at him, ''I'll tell Kate, I'll call my parents, I'll do whatever, but just know mister, you're not the boss of me.'' I point at him, he steps back as I was about to point at his chest. I walk back to the bedroom slamming the door. I sit down at the bed with my head in my hands, and let my tears flow out. What have I gotten myself into?


	3. Chapter 3

**ANA**

''You did what?'' Kate shrieks at me, after I've just told her what happened last night. We're sitting on the kitchen counter with a cup of tea, and she looks shocked. ''You are married? For real?'' she asks, and all I can do is nod, no matter how fake this marriage will be, I am still married to billionaire CEO Christian Grey whether I like it or not. ''Well he looked really into you, I gotta say.'' She says with a small smile, and I just shrug. ''Are you filing for an annulment? This is clearly not what you want.''

''We're not qualified for an annulment.'' I get up and put my empty tea cup in the sink, standing over the sink, sighing. ''It doesn't even matter,'' I say drying my hands on my pants, ''I promised Christian to try, and who knows, maybe it'll work out,'' I say with a fake smile on my face. Who am I kidding, we're not going to try this out, we're going to _wait this_ out, and it'll be the worst 6 months of my life.

''Yeah, maybe'' she says with a reassuring yet sad smile. ''Ana you're my best friend, all I want is for you to be happy.'' I walk over to her and give her a tight hug.

''I know, that's why I love you so much'' I sit back down and smirk at her. ''Now tell me, what's going on with you and my new brother in law?'' She immediately has a big face splitting grin on her face, and she blushes. I don't think I have ever seen Kate blush before.

''You know…'' she says looking away still smiling, ''I really like him.'' She says after a little while, ''he's different.'' Kate has always been one of those fuck em leave em kind of people, she gets tired of people really soon, and I've seen many boys heartbroken over her. ''He's really sweet, he didn't try to fuck me,'' my mouth drops when she says that, and I'm actually shocked. ''No, we had sex, only I had to be the one… you know,'' I roll my eyes; there's the Kate I know.

''Well don't get married right away,'' I joke, and it actually feels good joking about it, even though I'm freaking out on the inside. This is not what I imagined myself doing after college. All that 'make mistakes', and 'learn from it' shit that you're supposed to do after college; well this wasn't the mistake I had in mind. I look up at Kate, and she still has that sad look on her face.

''What did Ray say?'' She asks, concerned. I close my eyes recalling the conversation I had with my dad. The awkward silence after I had forced everything out in one breath was just humiliating. I didn't tell him the truth though; I told him that this is what I wanted.

''That was mortifying, I felt bad doing it over the phone, but it sort of felt safer at the same time,'' I take the pen that lies next to me on the table, and start to click on it to hide my shaky hands. ''I couldn't see his face, so I'm not sure how he feels about this, but he sounded disappointed. I've never heard him talk to me like that ever.'' I wish there was something Christian and I could do, I want to get out of this mess so badly. I just don't want my daddy to be ashamed and disappointed in me.

''What about your mom?'' Kate knows that I don't have the best relationship with my mother, I love her and all that, but I can only take her in small doses. After what happened with her husband number 3 we haven't been all that close, we were super close before that though. Then all that shit happened and I went to live with Ray. It was ultimately for the best.

''I haven't told her yet, I'm not sure how she'll react. She married young, she had me young, maybe it won't bother her that much or maybe it will bother her more that I'm following her footsteps.'' I sigh, my mom is a nut job, you don't really know what's going on in that head of hers, but she is my mother and nothing changes that, no matter how much I try telling myself otherwise I still love her. ''But I'm not worrying about that, there's no reason for her to care anyway.'' I lay down the pen, and look up at Kate. ''I really want a girly film night...''

''Yes! Let's do that, we can have ice cream, and candy'' she cuts me of and starts ranting on and on.

''We could do that, but do I want to sit down on that couch?'' I ask, pointing to our couch, and she bites her lip, ''thought not. I'm going to bed,'' I say and start walking towards my room.

''Ana,'' Kate whines ''we can still watch a movie, just don't think about the couch, we went to my room pretty soon after our clothes...'' I smile at her and shake my head; I'm really tired anyway, all this stress is killing me. ''It's only 2pm, are you really going to bed?'' She asks, crossing her arms in disbelief.

''I need to rest Kate; I have a major head ache, sorry, rein check?'' She nods her head, and I walk to my room and close the door, and for a second time since all this happened I let my tears flow free. After a few minutes with lying in my bed, quietly crying, I fall asleep.

* * *

><p>I'm awaken by a loud bang on my bedroom door, and my doorknob is shaking like crazy. ''Anastasia!'' is that Christian? The knocking and shaking continues, ''open up!'' he demands. Still in my clothes from before I get out of my bed and unlock the door then walk back to my bed and sit down yawning. He opens the door, and it hits the wall so hard that a few of my books fall down from its bookshelf. Including the <em>Tess<em> books he bought for the bike incident on our coffee date.

''What are you doing here Christian?'' I asks, tiredly I really don't want to do this now, or ever. He looks at me concerned for a moment then he walks over to my bed and sits down on my bed.

''Kate called,'' he says and I look up at him my eyes widening, ''she said you were crying, are you okay?'' He genuinely look like he cares, but he always has that perfect poker face, so maybe he's just an good actor. Maybe he's just trying to look concerned. I hate that I can't read his expressions.

''I'm fine,'' I lie, getting out of the bed and walking over to pick my books up and put them back on the shelves. I really didn't want to be sitting on my bed with him, it was too distracting. I don't even bother trying to convince myself otherwise, he is attractive. He lies down across my bed, with his hands behind his head, sighing. ''How did Kate have your number?''

''She called Elliot; Elliot called me, laughing his ass off over the marriage. Well he's a man whore and probably have 50 children out there, so I should be the one laughing.'' A man whore? Elliot? No way, not sweet, friendly Elliot, I don't believe that for a second. I didn't get any weird vibes from him while we talked yesterday; I have often gotten weird vibes from the other guys Kate has brought home.

I just stand there, looking at his body stretch out before me, god what's happening with me? He sits back up and I look quickly away, afraid he caught me staring. ''Look Ms… Anastasia,'' he starts ''I'm not happy about this either okay?''

''It's your fault you know?'' I say sitting down on the chair beside my desk, a look of anger flashing over his face.

''My fault? How the fuck is this'' he says motioning his hands between us ''my fault?'' Wow, Mr. Grey is angry now, well guess what? I'm angry too.

''Yes, your fault. I didn't need you last night, you shouldn't have come, if you hadn't come this'' I say motioning my hands between us the exact way he did it, ''would've never happened.''

''If I hadn't come? You would probably be at the police station right this moment filing a rape case against that photographer. This is your fault Ana, just admit it. I was going to drive you home, safely where you should've been. You had to whine and cry and get me to have a drink with you, because you're so damn stubborn.''

''Please go,'' I say turning my chair, so he doesn't see that his words affected me. He had no right to talk to me like that, he doesn't even know me, and he doesn't know anything about me. We're strangers to each other, strangers who just so happen to also be married to each other.

''Ana I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that, I jus…''

''Christian, I need to be alone, please.'' I hear him standing and walking a few steps before stopping. For a little while he just stands there, and I feel his stare at me, he sighs a few times before saying something.

''I'm going to call later to check that everything is fine, I'm sorry.'' Then he left.

* * *

><p>''You pick a movie!'' Kate shouts from her bedroom, and I walk over to our shelf of movies. I'm in a mood for some really girly drama, the kind of movie I usually hate. But not nowadays, since I've found myself in quite the drama myself. ''Not the notebook or Titanic, please something that's not depressing.'' She says walking out of her room in a cute pajama set that she recently bought.<p>

''Ehm, I think depressing is all we have,'' I say when I look through the movies. I don't often watch movies, and I never buy a movie so these are all Kate's. ''What about action?'' I ask, and she makes a face of disgust, well if she doesn't like action why buy it? ''I'm not in a mood for romance. Comedy?'' She shakes her head, ''any suggestions?'' I ask, and she gets up to look with me. _Me_ picking a movie always ends up with _Kate_ picking the movie, but I'm not complaining. All I want is to spend time with my best friend, eating unhealthy food, and having a night without any worries.

''Let's see… Bachelorette, that's a fun movie.'' I nod, and walk into my room to change into my pajamas. When I'm almost fully dressed, someone rings the door. ''Coming,'' Kate sing songs, as I continue to dress and braid my hair. ''It's something for you, I think?'' She says, standing in my door.

''What is it?'' I ask and get up from my bed to walk out and see what's going on. There's a box on our kitchen counter and on top of the box there's a note addressed to me.

**Anastasia**

**I am terrible sorry for the way I behaved earlier,**

**It was ungentlemanly of me, my sincerest apologies for my behavior**

**Christian**

''It's from Christian,'' I whisper as Kate reads the letter over my shoulder. Is Christian always like this? So formal, as if he's from the wrong century? It's sort of hot. It's better than slang, that's for sure. I can't even imagine Christian using slang, ever.

''What's in there,'' she asks, pointing to the unopened box.

''I'm not sure,'' I say as I start to open it. I'm shocked when I see what it inside the box; it's a computer_. _I take it out of the box and inspect it.

''Holy mother of Jesus,'' Kate whispers ''did you see this?'' She asks holding a necklace up, with huge eyes she looks at it. ''It's real,'' she whispers and it's a huge diamond formed as a star. ''Jesus Steele… Grey… whatever, first the books now this!'' She shakes her head, mouthing 'wow'. ''What did he mean with the note?

''Nothing,'' I say quickly, ''we're just both stressing out over this marriage thing. We didn't plan for this, obviously.'' I say and I pick up the Mac and necklace and carry them to my room, Kate following behind me.

''I thought you were going to give it a try,'' she says with a frown.

''We are, but we hardly know each other, we don't even live near each other.'' I say and she nods, looking deep in a thought, and then frowning once again. ''What is it?''

''Are you moving in with him?'' I close my eyes not wanting to see her reaction to the answer I'm about to tell her. We've been talking for months about moving to Seattle together, and now we've been more excited than ever because we're soon graduating.

''Yes,'' I whisper. I hear her breathing change, it's shaking. I open my eyes and she's on the verge of crying. ''Kate I'm sorry, but I have to do this, I wish I didn't'' I say and she shakes her head and dry her tears.

''No,'' she says ''of course you have to do this. I had just imagined us living together in Seattle, all Sex in the City and all that. We can still see each other, right? I'll visit you, you'll visit me. Maybe sneak in a few girl nights?'' She asks, looking hopeful at me.

''I would like that, yes we'll do that, as often as we can. You and me for life,'' I say taking out my pinkie finger, and she takes out hers and we hook them together smiling at each other. ''Now, what about that movie?'' She laughs, and we walk together into the kitchen to find some popcorn before we sit down and watch the movie. I send Christian a quick text, thanking him for the gifts, and telling him that I forgive him.


	4. Chapter 4

**ANA**

For the first time this year, or maybe ever, I'm out jogging, for many reasons. First of all, I need to clear my head; I need the fresh air, because it was starting to feel like I couldn't breathe. Christian is taking me to Seattle for to see where he lives, and to see the guest room I'm moving into. I would imagine that a hot single billionaire would live in a man cave, with as much technology as possible. But then again, Christian doesn't strike me as someone like that; I think his home is going to be rather large, but classy. And I'm going to live there for 6 months, pretending being his wife, god I don't think I'll ever wrap my head around that.

This is all insane, and I keep waiting for the moment when I wake up and realize it was all just a dream. It's not that I don't like Christian, but I don't know him. I don't want to be married to him because I don't want to be married to anyone that I'm not in love with. And then there's the whole moving in together thing, do I want that? I am in a relationship without love; no I'm in a _marriage _without love. I've never been in a relationship; I don't know how to be in a relationship, especially not a marriage. I've never been in love, so the whole 'not being in love' thing will be difficult to pretend otherwise. But I don't think it'll be that easy pretending to be married, in a healthy, happy marriage. I'm not that good of an actress.

I stop a second to see where I am, and realize I'm not that far from Christian's hotel, is that a coincidence or did something make me run here? Although, I didn't mean to run here, I didn't really mean to run anywhere, I just started. Well since I'm already here I might as well go up and meet with him now. We're only going on a small trip so I don't need to pack anything. I don't plan on spending the night before I move in; I want to spend as little time as possible together. His constant cranky mood is making me moody too.

Christian did tell me that I would get my own room, to decorate the way I wanted it to be, so I've been thinking a lot about what I want it to look like. I think it needs to be a place where I can see myself spending time, where I can enjoy my own company, so in my head I'm picturing wall after wall with books, comfy chairs to sit and read in, maybe making one of the corners into a working station for when I get a job. Looking at it like that, this seems like something I can do for a period of 6 months. But what will people think when we get the divorce? If we go public, then we get a divorce I would surely be made out as a gold digger. Before the the divorce, people will question my every move, and then they will be there ready to take the pictures when I fail my ''marriage.'' And my parents would be more disappointed in me.

I still haven't told my mom, but I know that I will have to sooner or later. I'm going for later. Telling my dad is worse than my mother, but I don't want another parent to be disappointed in me as well. But no one is as disappointed in me as I am in myself. I've always laughed when I've heard stories about something like this happening to other people, laughing over how stupid you really could be; now I'm one of them.

''Ana?'' I turn around when I hear a voice I've heard before but can't quite place the voice. I'm met with friendly blue eyes, and I can't help smile.

''Elliot, hey'' I say, biting my lip. He surprises me when he picks me up in a hug and spins me around, and I squeal, making everyone turn around and look at us. ''Let me down,'' I say when he continues to spin me. He lets me down with a soft chuckle.

''It's good seeing you again, how you've been?'' he asks, stuffing his hands awkwardly in his pant pockets.

''Nothing's changed much, spent some time with my friends, getting married, you know.'' I joke, and he laughs. It feels great making someone laugh for a change, particularly laughing over something I said rather than something I've done. ''Is Christian here?''

''Oh, you don't want to go up there,'' he says looking up ''he's not exactly having a friendly conversation with Taylor, I feel bad for the guy.'' I look at him questioningly, what did Taylor do wrong? ''He's mad about the day we went to that bar.'' He says, and eyes me. Did Christian tell him what's going on? What our plan is for this? ''It's not Taylor's fault,'' he continues after a few seconds. ''Taylor offered to pick you up, to get you home, but Christian got pissed off and said that Taylor didn't have to come, but Taylor being the good security guy he is followed anyway, and Christian got mad and sent him back. Now he's mad that he wasn't there to prevent things from happen.''

''The marriage,'' I whisper and he shrugs. ''Did he tell you?'' I ask in hope that he knows what I'm talking about ''about the annulment?'' He finally nods.

''You're going to make a go at it, right?'' He asks frowning and I nod. ''Well welcome to the family, sis.'' He says and gives me another hug, but keeping my feet firmly on the ground this time.

Instantly, Strong arms drag me away from Elliot, and I look up into Christian's fury eyes. I stop and he tries to drag me harder, but I'm not budging and he stops. ''What do you think you're doing?'' he asks, and I have no idea what he means. ''Don't flirt with my brother, Anastasia'' he hisses close to my ear, so he doesn't make more of a scene that he already has.

''We weren't flirting,'' I hiss the same way back ''we were having a conversation a normal conversation, just talking. Jesus Christian, that hurt'' I say rubbing my hand. He takes a look at my arm, and sighs.

''I'm sorry Ana.''

''You seem to be saying that a lot.''

''Yeah,'' he agrees ''I just acted out over what I saw, sorry.'' Elliot comes jogging up to us, and seems furious with Christian and protective over me. ''We're leaving,'' Christian says harshly, but this time he takes my hand lacing our fingers together, to show Elliot that I'm not in danger… I think.

''Where?'' Elliot and I both ask at the same time.

''Seattle,'' he answers.

* * *

><p>''We're going in that?'' I gasp as we excites from the elevator, and see a helicopter with 'GREY ENTERPRISES HOLDINGS' on the side of it in big block letters. I've never flown a helicopter before, is it safe?<p>

''Yes, it's faster'' he says and we walks over to the helicopter. Christian stops and talks with someone who's standing by the motor. I don't hear anything they're saying, as I feel myself slightly freaking out. Christian walks over to me and lays his hand on my lower back. ''It's safe, Anastasia. Relax'' he helps me in before walking around on the other side. He leans over the middle to help strap me in, he sees that I'm nervous and tense and gives me a quick kiss on my cheek, telling me everything will be fine.

We're sitting with both headsets on, but neither one of us are talking. My nervousness slowly eased up as we went into the air. Looking out the helicopter was amazing, and I decide that want to do it again. I couldn't stop muttering wow, over and over again, and every time I looked over at Christian he was smirking. We land on a high building, and he gets out and then helps me out after he's walked around to my side. I can't help smiling, that was amazing. He actually returns my smile, smiling up at me.

''That was amazing,'' I shout over the noise of the motors calming down, and he nods at me and we walk over to a private elevator. We walk in, ''which floor?'' I ask as I turn around to push on the button to the floor he tells me, but there's none there. Christian leans over and inserts a code and the door closes.

''Penthouse,'' he says, giving me yet another smirk. We stand in an uncomfortable silence, and it feels like I'm panting, and I tell myself over and over again in my head not to look at him. Somehow I really want him to push me against the wall and kiss me. I swallow and close my eyes. Don't think of him… you don't want him… he hasn't done anything nice to deserve a kiss...

Other than taking me out for coffee, giving me the Tess books after our almost kiss, I wanted him to kiss me at least. He apologized by buying me a Mac and a diamond necklace. But still… he hasn't done anything to make me have feelings for him. Yes, he made love to me, that's it he made me feel special no matter if we were drunk or not, I felt special.

I hear the door open and I open my eyes relieved. I turn around to look at Christian and he is looking me the way I felt only seconds ago, with an intense stare. I give him a little smile, then I walk out and stand in the hallway not really sure what I should do.

He walks out of the elevator, not looking at me and starts walking. I follow a few feet behind him. He walks straight into the kitchen and fills a glass of something. I'm not sure what it is but by the look of his face it's quite strong. He holds up the glass and looking questioningly at me, and I shake my head.

''You want a tour? I can show you your room,'' he says and I nod, better get this over and done with. He walks past me and starts walking towards my room… I guess. He only looks behind him a few times to see if I'm following him.

I was right this apartment is huge, everything is huge, open and… cold. He doesn't have much color in here, and it's quite depressing. In my room, I will have colors I don't know if I can live 6 months without having a color to look at. It surprises me that everything is black and white, and when I think over it I've never seen Christian in a color either.

He stops at a door and motion for me to walk in, he's not very talkative. I walk in and I'm stunned. When he told me about the room, I had imagined a normal guest bedroom and maybe a bathroom. But this room is the size of Kate and my living room. There's only a bed in here though, so it needs furniture. I walk over to the closet and look inside. It's a walk in closet, and it's humongous. I've never had that many clothes, and there's no way I can fill this closet. I close the door and walk over to the bathroom, and then I'm truly stunned. It's like everything else in his apartment, big. There's a double sized sink, there's a bathtub, and it's not on the small size. Wow, I can live here and never leave my room.

''I love it,'' I whisper, looking around to see if Christian is still there. He's standing casually in the door way, and smile. I walk over to him, and we walk out of the room. ''Where's your room?'' I ask, and he looks taken aback by my question.

''Other end of the apartment,'' he says and starts walking back to the kitchen. ''the housekeeper is here to clean and cook Monday to Thursday, so if you want to cook on the weekends feel free to do that. Mrs. Jones will always buy groceries, so don't worry about that. She'll clean your clothes, the whole apartment, you don't need to do that.'' Doesn't he do anything himself? I guess it can't be easy doing what he does, but can anyone be that busy that they can't cook and clean? ''If you don't want to cook,'' he continues ''you can always order take away.''

''You're not going to be eating with me?''

''Maybe sometimes, it depends on my schedule, any questions?'' He asks, and I shake my head. ''You'll be having security, and when we're no longer married I'll have someone looking over you from a distant.''

''You've got be kidding me,'' I say and he looks harshly at me narrowing his eyes, and shake his head. ''Why after the divorce?''

''Safety reasons,'' he says and doesn't elaborate more on that.

Christian order some food, and we eat in silence only looking up at each other a few times. After that Christian poured us both a glass of white wine, and we sat down in the living room.

* * *

><p>''Christian!'' I say in shock after we've been sitting there for an hour. ''We had sex,'' I gasp and he frowns and nods at me. ''I can't remember, we used protection right? I'm not on the pill or anything.'' He looks away for a second still frowning.<p>

''Yes,'' he says coldly when he looks back at me. ''You don't remember anything?''

''I think I remember parts of it, I'm not sure.'' He doesn't look pleased with my answer, he looks pissed off. ''I always I thought I would remember my first time, but things happen.'' I smile jokingly at him. He turns around and looks at me, his eyes widening.

''Your… you're… you were a virgin?'' He asks, I look away embarrassed biting my lip, and nod. ''Jesus Ana,'' he gets up and starts pacing back and forth. ''I was drunk!'' he yells, I'm not sure if the anger is pointed at me or himself. ''Why didn't you tell me? I would've…'' he looks at me and I shrug. ''Come,'' he says holding his hand out for me.

''What?''

''I'm making up for it, let me treat you the way I should have.''

''Ehm… I'm not sure that's a good idea Christian,'' I say nervously, looking down biting my lip.

''You didn't deserve your first time like that, please let me make up for it. I want to treat you right.''

* * *

><p>And he does, Christian is slow, gentle and amazing. He takes his time, taking of my clothes slowly, kissing the new naked area every time it appears. He's kissing me gently on my mouth, softly pushing his tongue against mine.<p>

He takes of his jeans, and lays me down on his bed, kissing my neck and jaw, as he thrust his erection against my aching spot, the only thing in our way are our underwear. He continues pushing himself down and circling his hips, and my breathing gets heavier.

He gets up from the bed, and I prop myself up on my elbows panicked; I'm sure he's changed his mind. But He takes of his boxers and finds a condom, his eyes never leaving mine as he slides it on. He gets back on the bed, and starts kissing me all over again. His hand runs down from my breast and down to my panties, and he tugs it down. When it's down around my legs I use my feet to take it completely off.

Christian takes himself in his hand, looking intently at me, as he finds my entrance. And he slowly, pushes in, slowly and sweetly filling me. The pain I remember from the first time isn't there. His eyes never leaving mine, he moves slowly in and out, and as my breathing increases he moves faster and faster.

He's following my heart, he's moving after the beat of my heart. And when I reach my high, and cry out his name, it feels like my heart stop and so does he. He cries out my name, and he tries to get his breathing back under control.

We lie, like that for a little while. Trying to get our breathing back to normal, and wrap our heads around what just happened. It was amazing, and I would be lying if I said I didn't want to do that again.

Christian's phone vibrates slightly, indicating a message. He reads it, and roll out of bed muttering ''shit'' as he walks naked into his bathroom, with clothes in his hand. He walks out of bathroom a few seconds later, fully dressed. ''Get dressed,'' he says ''my mother is coming up.''


	5. Chapter 5

**ANA**

By the somewhat panicked look on Christian's face, I can tell he hasn't yet told his parents about me. Great, this will only make the first meeting so much worse.

I roll of the bed, with the covers over me, and Christian turns around and smirks at me, while looking me up and down. ''You have 5 minutes,'' he says then he leaves me alone in his bedroom. I take my clothes and get dressed in what I was already wearing, since I don't have anything else to wear. I stand in front of the mirror extremely nervous about going out there to meet his mother. I sigh, breath in and out, and then walk out into the living room.

Christian is standing there talking to a woman who has her back to me. Christian wears blue jeans and a white shirt, and he's barefoot. The woman has a neat high ponytail, and from my back view of her, I think she looks classy, she looks like what I pictured a mother to a billionaire to look like. I stand awkwardly in the entrance to the living room, unsure what to do. Christian's eyes meet mine, and he smiles. Is this the acting Christian or is this the real Christian? Argh it's frustrating.

The woman turns around, first with a smile on her face and when she sees me get closer, a frown appears on her face. She doesn't take the first step toward introduction, and we just stare at each other. ''Anastasia,'' Christian says ''this is my mother Dr. Grace Trevelyan Grey.'' He says gesturing towards the woman in front of me. ''Mother, this is Anastasia,'' he says walking over to me, holding me by my waist. ''My wife,'' his mothers eyes widen, and it does not seem to be in a good way.

We stare at each other for a little while, her with her cold hard stare, and me trying to smile the best I can. She narrows her eyes at me for a second, before turning her attention back to her son with a much warmer smile, but it doesn't reach her eyes and it looks rehearsed. ''Elliot told me you're back,'' she says.

''I bet he did,'' Christian murmurs under his breath. ''We're doing things ready for Anastasia's move.''

''Anastasia,'' she says formally ''can you give me a second with my son?'' she raises her eyebrows, like she's challenging me to say no.

''Of course, Mrs. Grey'' I say and I leave the room. I'm not out of earshot when they start arguing, well his mother is arguing. I look behind me and realize that I have no view to the two of them, so they can't see me either, so I stay and listen to their conversation.

''Christian! You're married, how is it this is the first I hear about this.''

''It was sort of a in the moment thing,'' he says calmly.

''Do you even know her intentions with this marriage! How long have you known this girl?''

''A couple weeks.''

''Christian, I didn't raise you to be this stupid. It's obvious she's after your money.''

''Mother, she's not a gold digger,_ I _suggested this marriage, and when we met she didn't even know who I was.''

''Is she here illegally? Are you trying to help her stay in the country? Just… Christian, I don't understand'' she's crying now ''what's going on with you, this isn't like you at all, I'm worried. Why marry her so soon?''

''Hush, mom, I'm sorry'' I guess he's hugging his mother now, soothing her hysteria ''I love her; we did it because of love I promise you. Give her chance, she's really great.'' That has to be the acting Christian, I'm sure of it. I walk to Christian's bedroom and sit down on his bed waiting for them to finish.

* * *

><p>I have no idea how long I sit in Christian's room, but I'm not hearing shouting out there anymore. I walk back and forth in his room, stopping a few times to stare out the window; it's really an amazing view from up here, it's so high.<p>

''She's gone,'' I'm startled by Christian's voice. I turn around, and he's standing in the doorway with an unreadable expression.

''She doesn't like me,'' I say staring down at the floor, a little bit disappointed by that fact.

''She doesn't know you,'' he says looking apologetic ''she's just protective over me, over all her children in fact.''

''I understand that Christian, I really do. But do I really look like a gold digger? Someone who would just marry for money? Do I look like whore?''

''No, Anastasia, you don't'' he says, and he turns around and leave the room.

''Is that all you have to say?'' I ask angrily while sprinting after him. He turns around suddenly, stopping me in my pursuit, when I am faced with his angry confused eyes.

''What do you want me to say? That you're beautiful, that there's no way you could be a whore? Because if you want to hear it, I'll tell it to you.'' It takes everything in me not to slap him, so I turn away just like he did a minute ago and start looking for the room that was meant for me, he said he would let me be alone there. ''Ana!'' he calls after me, but I continue walking.

I find the room and shut the door with as much force as I can. I lie down on the bed, and let my tears fall again. I'm not really sure what I wanted him to tell me, but he could've at least defended me somehow. Minutes before his mother came, we had just made love for a second time, didn't that mean anything to him? There's a knock on the door but I don't answer.

''Ana,'' he says softly and continues knocking. ''I'm sorry.''

''Stop saying you're sorry!''

''Sorry,'' he whisper against the door ''I won't come in unless you invite me, please open the door.'' I stand up and walk to the door, ready to open it for him. But I don't, I sigh as I slide down the door, a lightly bang my head against it. I hear Christian slide down too, ''Ana,'' he whisper ''don't let my mother ruin anything, we were having a nice time together before she came.'' The tears continue down my face, I think the ''nice time'' we were having before his mom showed up meant more to me than it did for him.

''I wanna go home,'' I say and I hear him sigh.

''I thought we could discuss what to do with your room. But if you really want to go I can have Taylor drive you back.'' Taylor? When did he get her, ''or maybe Reynolds,'' he says ''since Taylor's still in Portland, or if you wait until tomorrow I'll drive you back.'' I sit there weighing my options, I rather go home today. ''What do you want?'' he asks after a while when I haven't answered him. A divorce, I want to tell him but I don't. Christian is being awfully sweet to me now; will I see this side of him often, or is this just more of his acting?

I open the door still sitting in front of it, so it doesn't actually open that far. I get up and Christian is standing there with a half smile, I can see a small hint of a little dimple in his cheek. ''Can I come in?'' he asks, and I answer with a nod.

He walks in and hugs me; I'm surprised to begin with but quickly hug him back. ''I wanna go home now,'' I whisper and he nods. ''What happened earlier was a mistake,'' I say walking out of his embrace, ''it won't ever happen again.''

* * *

><p>''Ana! How's Seattle?'' Kate asks as I walk in the door. Kate is sitting on the couch cuddling with Elliot, and they both look really happy. I want that, I want someone that wants to do that with me. When I said to Christian that what we did was a mistake he couldn't have agreed quicker, and he promised me that it would never happen again, that there was not a chance of it ever happening again. He sounded so mad when he said, and just minutes earlier he was so sweet. ''Ana?''<p>

''Yeah, it was fine,'' I answer walking into my bedroom to change out of these clothes that Christian only hours ago stripped me out of. I better burn them. I'm ignoring the smirk on Elliot's face as I pass them. I change into sweatpants and a t-shirt. Frankly, I don't care how I look in front of Elliot, and then I walk back out to make myself a cup of tea.

The two of them aren't really watching the movie; they're mostly just watching each other while occasionally glancing at the TV. It's only been a few days, but I can clearly see that they both love each other. I want that, but for another 6 months I won't have the chance to find that.

''Everything okay?'' I turn around when I hear Kate behind me with another look of worry on her face. ''Did something happen?''

''No,'' I shake my head ''everything's great'' I lie with the sweetest smile I can make at the moment. She looks behind her at Elliot then back at me again. Elliot is texting someone on his phone, not paying attention to our conversation.

''I can ask him to go if you need me Ana,'' she says looking behind her once more, ''because I don't believe everything is fine, but with your husband's brother here you won't tell me anything.''

''Nothing to tell, and don't ask him to leave, he's good for you.'' I smile at her and she grins back nodding her head in agreement. She gives me hug then turn around to walk back to Elliot; she turns around with a serious look on her face.

''We're talking about it later,'' she says and points her finger at me.


	6. Chapter 6

**CHRISTIAN**

''So Christian, Taylor said this was an emergency meeting,'' Flynn says folding his hands in his lap. I'm pacing the floor of his office. ''You want to stand or…''

''I'll stand.''

''Okay, what's going on?''

''I'm married,'' I say and I don't think I've ever seen Flynn's eyes widen this much. After a couple years as my therapist, after everything I've ever told him, he's never reacted this way before. He unfolds his hands and finds a note pad and starts writing. I sigh and sit down in front of him on the couch.

''Tell me about her,'' he says not looking up.

''It's Anastasia,'' I say and he looks up and nods, it doesn't look like _that _shocked him, well it sure as hell shocked me. And ever since I woke up that day realizing what we had done, I've had this constant feeling in my stomach, like something isn't right. The ache has only disappeared once, only one time when this whole thing hasn't felt wrong. It was when I made love to her for a second time.

''Ms. Steele? Tell me what happened?''

''Grey now,'' I say and he nods returning his attention back to his notes ''I went to Portland,'' he looks up with raised eyebrows, he knows why I went ''she asked for a photo for the article, I showed up they took the photos…'' I start fidgeting with my hands ''I asked her out for coffee.''

''A date?''

''It wasn't meant as a date, not in my eyes… anyway we talked, and I could see it in her face, I could see that what I was doing was wrong, I could never be with her, but there's just something about her…'' I start pacing the floor again. ''She drunk dialed me later, clearly pissed at me after I rejected her kiss. So I tracked down her phone. I was just going to drive her home, but she wanted me to have a drink with her, and I did. I don't know why, it's not like me, but when I'm around her I'm not me. We had a few drinks, and then I don't remember much until I woke up beside her at my hotel.''

''It may sound Christian,'' he says still writing ''that you might have feelings for this girl, am I correct?''

''_No!_ You know me; I don't _have_ feelings for anyone.'' I say angrily.

''But you admit that you physically and mentally change around her, what is it that happens when you're with her.''

''She innocent, pure…'' I whisper not believe I'm saying this ''she's young, I want her to believe that there's nothing bad in this world.'' I laugh sarcastically ''I guess I'm not the right person for that, huh?''

''Does she make you want to be a better person?''

''How do you make someone want to be better? No, nothing can make me a better person. I am who I am. There's just something intriguing about her, and I want to know what it is.''

''Do you think that you may get feelings for her?''

''Other than sexual? No'' he looks up from the pad and narrows his eyes at me frowning.

''Have you two been intimate?'' I nod ''without any elements?'' I nod again, ''how was that?''

''Well the first time…'' he looks up, his eyebrows raised ''we were drunk, but it didn't bother me. even though she was drunk she understood when I told her I didn't want to be touched, and she didn't try to touch me.'' I sit back down, ''she… she later told me that… that it was… she was a virgin, I didn't know.''

''How did that make you feel?''

''Like an asshole. I knew she was inexperienced but I didn't think she was a virgin. If I knew I would've waited until we were both sober.''

''But you would still have intercourse with her?''

''Yes, I think so. When she told me she was a virgin, I wanted to make it up to her, she told me she didn't remember much so I saw that as a possibility to make her first time more special,'' I frown thinking over what I'm saying.

''You wanted to make her first time special,'' he states and I nod. ''Then what happened?''

''I took her to my bedroom,'' he looks even more surprised by that, since I never take anyone to my bedroom. ''I took my time, giving her compliments. I didn't exactly have a special first time,'' I say refereeing to time I lost my virginity to Elena. ''I at least wanted to know that _I_ made her first time special.''

''You probably did,'' he says still writing, with all he's written he could probably make a book out of it. And he would, if I died I'm sure that he could make a fortune of writing a book about how fucked up I am. ''Did you kiss her?'' He asks, knowing that I've only kissed one person my entire life because I never kissed the subs, not once.

''I have,'' I say looking out the window. What is Anastasia doing to me? She's messing with my head, and right this moment I wish we were back at Escala, before my mother showed up. ''She regrets it,'' I whisper not looking back at him.

''She regrets what?''

''That we slept together, she told me it was a mistake, and she had this ashamed look on her face,'' I shake my head clearing it ''she's right, it was wrong of us.'' He finishes what he's writing and look back up at me.

''I want to meet her.''

''No.''

''Okay, but when you're ready I want to meet her.'' He turns his notes to a blank page and gets ready to write more ''is it in your plans to make her a sub? I know you want to, I know that was the plan. But what is your plans with her now?''

''We can't get divorced until it's been half a year, so the plan's just letting her stay with me until then.''

''Then what? You're kicking her out, saying you don't want to see her again? What about your family,

what if she gets closed to them, I would think they would like to get to know your wife.''

''I haven't thought about that,'' I clench my teeth with anger. ''I will deal with it when the time comes,'' he sighs and shakes his head. ''You're not helping me here, the only thing you're doing is questioning me.''

''I'm trying make you question yourself, to make you see that there are other solutions to this situation.''

''Such as?''

''That's up to you, I'm not here to tell you have to live your life, you know that. Are you thinking of Anastasia?'' All the damn time, I want to say but I don't, ''are you thinking of her feelings in this, have you asked her what she wants to do with the situation?'' I shake my head, I haven't really asked her. I didn't even ask her to move in with me, I told her. ''Are you afraid to ask her?''

''No, I just don't see the point.'' He shakes his head once more, and I'm not appreciating his disapproval at the moment.

''You don't want her to talk to me. Is that because of all the things I know?'' I nod, that's partly the reason, and the other part is that it would mean that I need to tell her that I go to a therapist, which not something I talk about. ''But I think you should make her talk to someone Christian, this thing you're going through right now isn't healthy, she can't be dealing well with this either. I could recommend someone if you'd like.''

''You think she need it?''

''I do, you're clearly struggling with this, don't you think she is struggling with it?''

''I got a texted not that long ago from Elliot,'' I say and he nods for me to continue ''he sent it just seconds after Ana got home, he asked me what I did to her. He asked why it looked like she'd been crying for 2 hours straight. I called Reynolds, who was driving her home, and he confirmed that she had been sobbing the whole way back. So yes, maybe she's struggling too.''

''How did that text make you feel?''

''I know I'm the reason she was crying, and that doesn't make me feel good at all. But she wanted to leave, she said that having sex was a bad thing, she doesn't want it to happen again.''

''Do you want it to happen again?''

''It's sex. Yes.''

''You are attracted to her?'' I nod, and I see the slightest chance of a smirk on his face. ''Christian at the course of 6 months, do you think you might get feelings for her? A little bit, and do you think that maybe she might get feelings for you? After all you will be living together?''


	7. Chapter 7

**ANA**

I walk out of my room and stop in the doorway when I see Elliot sitting at our kitchen bar, wearing only his boxers. He obviously spent the night, but I'm not sure if I'm really comfortable with the way he feels like his home is here. I walk out of my room and into the kitchen without looking at him. Kate has never let anyone spend the night before, but Elliot is here, in our kitchen, in his boxers drinking coffee and reading the paper.

''Morning,'' he says. I don't know why I'm so embarrassed all of a sudden. Where's Kate?

''Good morning,'' I say back still with my head in the fridge. ''Where's Kate?'' I close the door to the fridge and heat up some water. He's looking at me over the paper with a smirk on his face.

''Still asleep,'' he turns the page with his his eyes still on me. ''So… how did the meeting with my mother go?'' He raises an eyebrow looking questioningly at me.

''Ehm…'' I say sitting down on the other end of the kitchen bar, ''she doesn't like me much.'' He frowns looking a bit confused, like he wasn't expecting that to be my answer. ''I didn't get to talk to her much, though'' I say as he nods putting the paper down. ''I probably just need some time with her, get to know her more.''

''She's an amazing mother; you'll love her when you see who she really is. I guess having her _baby boy_ getting married was a shock to her,'' he says dryly, almost like he's jealous of the bond between Christian and their mother.

''You're not close?'' I ask and he frowns again in confusion, ''you and Christian I mean.'' He looks away for a second, before looking back at me.

''It's complicated. I love him, he's my little brother but… it's just complicated.'' When I don't answer he continues talking, looking down at his coffee cup. ''It was hard to adjust after my parents adopted Christian; he got most of the attention from them. And now I understand why, I do but I was only a kid back then… He was 4 when they adopted him, he'd been through much at such a young age,'' I sit quietly listening to Elliot's story. ''He didn't talk… he couldn't. Sometimes he tried but nothing came out, so my mom was by his side all the time when she was home, always scared that something would happen to him and that he couldn't call for help.''

Elliot's not looking at me, so he can't see the shock displayed on my face. ''I was scared of Christian, I didn't understand him, didn't understand what was wrong with him so I tried to stay away. I guess after a while I felt a bit invisible.'' He stands and refills his cup and then he sits down again. ''He used to hit me; he was 4 and weak so it didn't hurt, but it was annoying. And I was 8, I couldn't hit him back no matter how much I wanted to.'' Kate walks out of her bedroom, yawning and Elliot stops talking and opens the paper again. Kate walks over to him and kisses him saying ''good morning, babe.'' She blushes and then kisses him again.

''What were you guys talking about?'' she asks, getting herself a cup of coffee then sitting down beside Elliot.

''Ana's meeting with my mother,'' he says not looking up at me, I guess he doesn't want Kate to know about his fragile relationship with his brother. She doesn't complain about the fact that Elliot is sitting in only his boxers in front of me, it's seems like this is going to be our normal routine with Elliot here.

''How did that go?'' She asks leaning forward in her chair.

''I look forward to spending more time with her, get to know her. It was only a brief time she was there so I didn't really get to talk to her.'' I say carefully while putting my tea cup in the sink. When I sit back down there's a loud knock on our door, so I quickly get up and answer it.

I open the door and look into grey eyes, and I can't help the smile that stretches across my face, no matter how much I don't want to smile.

''Christian,'' I say and he walks us in and then he leans down and kisses me, immediately ruining my good mood at seeing him. I know he only kissed me for show, so as to not make Kate and Elliot suspicious. ''Coffee?'' I ask walking back into the kitchen, I look around and he shakes his head.

''Jesus Elliot,'' he says when he walks into the kitchen. ''Put some fucking clothes on,'' I turn around and see the angry stare he's giving Elliot. I bite my lip to hide my smile. Elliot mutters something under his breath as he stands and walks to Kate's bedroom. I look at Christian and he motions his head towards my bedroom, and I follow him.

When I'm inside and close the door he turns around and traps me against the door. ''How are you feeling?'' he asks looking concerned, which confuses me more each time he acts concerned for me. I can't tell the difference between his emotions and his acting, is this concern real or not?

"I'm okay,'' I say crossing my hand over my torso, he steps back so that I can walk over to my bed and so I sit down. ''I was wondering,'' I pause and he nods for me to continue while he takes a seat in the chair in front of my desk. ''If we were both drunk when… uh… How did you know that we used protection?''

A little playful smirk appears on his mouth ''I saw a condom wrapper lying beside the bed… So unless we blew balloons with it, I'm pretty sure that we used it as how it is supposed to be used.'' He folds his hands in his lap and suddenly gets a serious look on his face. ''How… how are you feeling?''

''How I'm feeling?'' I ask and he nods ''okay I guess.''

''No but really Ana, how are you doing. Are you happy?'' He frowns while still maintaining the serious expression on his face.

''I'm not all that happy with the situation,'' I say carefully because I'm not really sure of the nature behind his question, ''but I guess it could've been worse. We'll make it work for 6 month, right?'' I ask and his expression doesn't change a bit.

''Do you… would it maybe be good for you to see someone?'' He asks, and I'm actually shocked. What does he mean by 'see someone'? Does that mean that He wants me to find a boyfriend or date someone while I'm married to him? He sees the confused look on my face 'Would you like to go to therapy to talk to someone you trust about all this?''

''I'm not insane,'' I say defensively.

''Of course you aren't, that's not the reason people goes to psychiatrists… But you're young Ana, you're about to start your life and begin to understand how this world truly works. And you have gotten into this situation that is rather strange, so maybe it would be good for you to see someone.''

''Do you?'' I ask, ''see someone I mean.''

''I do,'' he says but leaves it at that. ''I know a few good psychiatrist you could talk to, maybe woman if you prefer.'' I'm surprised but I find myself nodding, because maybe it would help, maybe I need to complain to someone about how confused I am about this whole thing. ''Good,'' he says ''I'll make an appointment for the first week you move in.'' He says tapping on his phone. ''I'm hungry,'' he says when he looks up from his phone. ''When's your dad, coming here?'' he asks apprehensively.

Shit, I totally forgot about that. I look down on my clock and sigh.

''An hour.''

* * *

><p><strong>CHRISTIAN<strong>

''Let's sit in the bar, until your dad gets here,'' I says leading Ana over to the bar. We sit down, and I order for both of us. ''Have you thought about what you want to do with you room?''

''Yes, sort of… I was thinking about going to IKEA to look for inspiration, so I'll at least know what I need." She says and my eyes widen, resulting in me tipping my wine glass and spilling it, without noticing.

''IKEA? Really?'' I say wiping up the wine I spilled. ''Ana…'' I sigh ''why would you want your furniture from IKEA?''

''They have nice stuff there and it is all fairly inexpensive.'' Inexpensive? They have crap that breaks after a few weeks, and uncomfortable couches and beds, and that's not something I want at Escala.

''Money's not a problem; you can have anything you want from anywhere. I would import shit from whatever country you want, and all you want to do is go to IKEA?'' All I want to do is buy her whatever she wants; money isn't a problem, I don't even think about the cost.

''I don't want furniture that I'll be nervous sitting on because of the price. I can barely walk on your floor for fear of ruining it, because it looks really expensive.'' I frown at her; I really don't understand her arguments on this at all. ''Okay then. I'll just stick to the bed that's already there. Forget about the other furniture, it's not really necessary,'' she says turning her legs on the other side of the barstool looking away from me.

''Ana,'' I sigh ''don't be…''

''Immature?'' she finishes. That was what I was going to say, without thinking, but now thinking over how she reacted when I called her stubborn maybe it's a good idea to just keep my mouth shut. ''I don't know who's right in this argument Christian or who is being more immature. But just because I don't want extremely expensive things in my room, then I'm immature? I don't want to spend your money! I don't even like the idea that you have so much money, it's really sickening.''

''Sickening? What are you talking about? What's wrong with having money? Isn't that what everyone wants?''

''It depends on what you're spending it on,'' she says gulping down her wine in one sip. ''Give me a budget.''

''What?'' What's she getting at?

''Give me a budget. I'll spend it all, but it's up to me how I use it. If I want to buy inexpensive furniture, and donate rest of the money to some organization, then that's what I'll do.'' I look at her, still confused. ''I'm tired of you thinking you own me. I married you, okay? We're married yes, but this is a time where woman are independent, we don't need to rely on our husbands to do everything for us.'' She looks really pissed, and I look down on my watch, anxious that her father will walk in on this fight. ''I'm not going to sit around in your apartment day in and day out waiting for you to ignore me when you get home. I will not stand in the kitchen and cook for you, when you'll like. I will not…''

I lean forward and kiss her. I kiss her long and hard. She looks hot when she's pissed, and I'm not going to try and deny that she's hot. In addition to her sexiness, I also saw a man walking in here that I think might be her father. But what surprises me the most, is that Ana's kissing me back. She's not pushing me away or yelling at me some more. She opens her mouth and invites me in, and I oblige with what she wants.

''Okay,'' I whisper against her mouth as I pull away. ''You can go to IKEA… do you want me to come?'' She nods her head, before we break apart. The man I thought might be her dad wasn't her dad. He sat down at another table where a woman and a child were waiting for him. Ana looks away, flushed.

''I… I need to go to the bathroom…'' she says looking around for the sign, she points at it, not looking at me ''I... I'll be… there'' she says jumping of the stool, and practically running towards the bedroom.

I lean back in my chair pick up my glass of wine and can't help the smirk that's creeping its way on my lips. My lips on her lips, god this is all messing with my head. But that was one hell of a kiss, the best I've ever had, granted I haven't had that many since I never kissed any of my subs, but kissing Ana is definitely something I would do again, it's worth the confusion I feel after.

''Mr. Grey?'' I turn around a see a man looking questioningly at me. He has gray hair, and would look really intimidating if I didn't deal with guys like him all the time.

''Christian Grey,'' I exchange my hand to him, and he grips it tightly as he shakes my hand, with a hard look in his eyes.

''Raymond Steele,'' he says looking around the room for Ana. ''Where's my daughter?'' He has a harsh tone to his voice. ''May I have a seat?'' He asks and I nod as he sits down where Ana sat. ''I just want to say this before I get to know you better.'' He says as he orders a beer. ''If you ever hurt her, even the tiniest bit, I'll come after you. I don't care how rich you are or how many security monkeys you have, no one, and I mean no one messes with my little girl… She's been through much…'' he says taking a swig out of his beer. ''She didn't have it easy growing up, and she doesn't deserve more pain, she's already been through enough.''

''I…'' I say a little stunned. ''I understand your concerns, I don't intend on hurting your daughter, sir.'' Ana didn't have it easy growing up, what does that mean? Was she bullied a lot? Did she have problems at home, maybe an ex boyfriend.

''Call me Ray,'' he says with a laugh and pat me on my back. I look behind him and see Ana running towards us full speed.

''Daddy!'' She squeals and gives him a loud smack of her lips on his cheek. ''When, did you get here?'' She asks, and the happiness shining through her is something I've never seen before. She looks so young and free, and beautiful. I want to see that look more often on her face, she's so beautiful. I can't help but smile with them. ''Oh dad,'' she says ''this is Christian,'' she says standing beside me and I wrap my arm around her waist of pure perfection.

''Yes, we've met,'' he says with a genuine smile ''looks like a good guy, Annie'' he says and Ana beams at her father. I can't help that light feeling in my chest at her smile right now directed at me, like she isn't ashamed of me. _God, what's happening to me?_

* * *

><p>''So dad, what have you been up to lately?'' Ana asks, when the waitress leaves with our empty desert plates. ''Have you found someone?'' She asks smiling at him.<p>

''You know, same ole same ole'' he says chuckling. ''Annie you'll always be my number one girl.''

''I better be,'' she says playfully ''but I don't want you to get lonely, I haven't been visiting much and I don't want you to sit in that house all alone.'' She looks sad for a moment, before her smile returns. But this time it isn't her real smile, it's the polite smile she always plasters on her face, I've noticed.

''I'm not alone all the time Ana, and if I find someone I'll find someone, but I'm not looking,'' he says smiling reassuringly at her, then at me. ''And I am happy, my daughter is graduating college, she's married, though you're way too young, but you found a great guy Annie,'' he says looking first at her then at me. ''And it's way too soon to be thinking about this, but maybe I'll get a grandchild in a few years and…''

That's where my hearing stops; I can't make out anything else he's saying. Grandchildren? Children! No way, I don't want them! I'm not planning on them at all, and Ana and I aren't really married. Legally we are, but neither one of us thinks we're husband and wife. He should not be hoping for a grandchild, at least not from me.

Jesus this is too much, ''excuse me…'' I say getting up from my chair. ''I have a meeting in half an hour, so I need to get going.'' I say, total lie but it was the best I could come up with. ''You'll both be fine, right? I can send Taylor back for you.'' I say looking down at Ana.

''No need, we can take a cab… or did you drive here, daddy?'' She asks sweetly, and he nods at her. ''We'll be fine'' she smiles up at me.

''Good,' I say leaning down kissing her lightly on her mouth, then I turn to Ray and shakes his hand. ''See you tomorrow, at the graduation.'' I say then I text Taylor and tell him that I'm ready to head back to the hotel.


	8. Chapter 8

**ANA**

I stare at Christian's back as he hurries out of the restaurant. I'm pretty sure it was my dad's comment about kids that scared him away. I understand his concern though, because kids aren't in our future, at least not together. When he's out the door I turn my attention back to my father, and he's smiling proudly of himself.

''Knew that would scare him away,'' he whispers with a chuckle. ''Are you happy, Annie?'' I give him a reassuring smile and nod my head. I haven't been happy for awhile now, but things went really well today with Christian and I can't stop hoping that this will work. Not the marriage obviously, but me being okay with it, that's what I ultimately want. ''That's good,'' he says frowning ''did he leave us with the check?''

''No,'' I laugh, because that definitely would've been funny. "He pre-paid for dinner, so we can buy everything on the menu now, without worrying about the cost.'' I say with a mischievous grin. ''Should we do that?'' I whisper playfully. My humor isn't the funniest, but Ray and I are pretty similar in the humor department.

''I won't say this again, Annie, because I know you know this, but you're awfully young to be married,'' I give him a weak apologetic smile and he continues and asks, ''but when it's love it's love, right?'' I nod my head in agreement, although not meeting his eyes. ''I married your mom quickly, so who am I to talk. But I fell in love, with both of you, I just knew I needed her as my wife and you as my daughter, you were just so precious.'' He smiles lovingly at me.

''I'm sorry mom treated you the way she did,'' I say referring to her cheating. I was really young at that time, but I remember how heartbroken he was, and how much my mom hated him when he wanted a divorce. The worst part though is that he forgave her the first time, she promised it was the only time and that she was drunk. So he forgave her. He truly loved her and I just wish she loved him back. When he caught her cheating the second time he couldn't take it anymore, and I think he knew it had been going on for a long time.

Out of resentment, mom moved us to Texas and I was barely allowed to have contact with Ray. But he had adopted me; I was his daughter so she had no right to keep us from each other. Then things got really bad in Texas and Ray told my mother that he didn't care what he had to do, but he was getting me out of that house.

''It's okay, I have you'' he smiles a genuine smile. I love how much love he has for me, he has never made me feel like I wasn't his own, never raised his voice if it wasn't necessary. I never knew my biologic father, but I couldn't have gotten a better dad than Ray. ''Should we, get going?'' He asks.

''Where are you staying? I wish we had a room for you,'' I say sadly. He could sleep on the couch but it's not a comfortable couch to sleep on. And with Elliot walking around in our apartment in his underwear all the time, and then with sounds that can be heard from Kate's room at night, I didn't really want to offer Ray the couch, not that he would accept it anyway.

''Christian offered me a room at the hotel he's staying at,'' I'm surprised by this, but also really pleased, that was a nice gesture from Christian. I think if we try we could definitely be friends by the end of this situation. ''I'll drop you off at your apartment'' he says standing up and putting on his jacket as we make our way out of the restaurant. ''You should get a good night's sleep before your big day tomorrow.''

* * *

><p>''No partying tonight, Annie'' Ray says as I walk out of his car. I was a really quiet child when I was younger, I never got into trouble, and I always did what I was asked to do. But I guess that my dad doesn't know what I do when he's not around, which is almost nothing. Except that one time I got drunk, but I don't think I'll ever get drunk again since I ended up married the first time.<p>

''I will try,'' I say. ''Good night daddy, see you tomorrow.'' I close the car door and walk up the stairs to our apartment. It's only 6pm, so I think I will relax rest of the day. I take my keys out of my pocket, and unlock the door. And immediately slam it again. ''Oh my god!'' I shriek. I can never un-see what I just saw. Kate and Elliot on the couch, Kate was bouncing on top of him, argh...Jesus I'll never sit on that couch ever again.

Kate opens the door in her robe, blushing. I walk past her and see Elliot's bare back as he walks into her bedroom. ''You two are unbelievable.'' I say walking into the kitchen, to get a glass of water. Kate sits down on the counter next to me, still blushing. Elliot walks out in only sweatpants. I don't stare at him long enough to see his body in detail, but I can tell it's nothing like Christian's. I shake that thought out of my head, as Elliot sits down beside Kate.

''Heard of knocking?'' he asks, with a proud smirk on his face.

''It's my apartment!'' I say looking at both of them. ''Heard of a bed?''

''Well we wanted a change,'' he says still with that disgusting smirk on his face. I think I'm going to be sick. ''You and Christian might want to stick to a bed, since you're both so new at this.'' He says, and I frown, wondering what we were new at? ''Christian's never had a girlfriend,'' he explains ''you were probably his first.'' Somehow I seriously doubt that, if he was new at it he wouldn't be so sure of himself, and it seemed like he knew what he was doing.

''Awww that's sweet,'' Kate says smiling sweetly at me. I look at the both of them, and they're still flushed.

''I'll leave you to alone to… finish whatever you were doing, I'll be… elsewhere'' I say picking up my keys in a hurry, and get out of that apartment as fast as I can. I walk out, and realize that I have nowhere to go.

I take out my phone and as I start walking, text Christian asking how his meeting is going. I feel my phone vibrating in my back pocket, and take it out and see that it's Christian calling. ''Hey, you okay?'' he asks.

''Yes, I was just wondering… if maybe I could, if you're not busy of course, if I could meet you at your hotel?'' I ask nervously. I don't know if I'm nervous that he might say no, or that he actually says yes.

''Yeah, sure… sure everything's okay?'' I hear some muffled voices on the other line. ''Just, stay where you are. Taylor will be there shortly. Did something happen?'' He asks again.

''Sort of… I kind of walked in on Kate and your brother in the… act'' I say blushing. I don't know why I'm embarrassed, but I hope I'll never see those two in a compromising situation ever again.

''What!'' he sounds angry; he mutters a few words under his breath that I can't make out.

''Yeah, I closed the door quickly. I saw things I never wanted to see,'' I notice a car slow down beside me, and I recognize it as the car Christian drove me home in after the photo shoot, and our subsequent coffee date. ''Taylor's here,'' I say as I get in the car.

''Good,'' he breaths out, and then he hangs up without saying goodbye or anything else.

''Hi,'' I say to Taylor and he nods back at me. I don't know how to act around Taylor, whether or not I'm supposed to talk to him or just pretend he's not there. When I get one of these protection people for myself, I want to be on a friendly note with him or her.

* * *

><p>I walk into the lobby and see Christian standing there casually waiting. He's in blue jeans and a white t-shirt, and he looks just as good in it as he does in his suits. When he sees me he starts walking towards me.<p>

''Hi,'' I whisper, biting my lip nervously. I still don't feel comfortable around him, but I hope we can change that soon.

''Hi,'' he whispers back, and takes my hand and leads me to the elevator. I look behind me and see that Taylor is nowhere in sight. We walk into the elevator and I yet again ask which floor, and I get the same smirk as I did last time, as he inserts his keycard and pushes the penthouse button, and yet again its almost unbearable being in an elevator with him. I feel like I'm holding my breath all the way up, so as to avoid the tension I feel with him in the elevator.

The elevator opens and we walk out. I remember where the kitchen, bedroom and leaving room is, but I get the feeling that there's part of this penthouse that I haven't seen. ''Do you need such a big place?'' I ask as I turn around and try to take it in all at once.

''I like it,'' he says walking past me and in the direction of the kitchen.

''It's a beautiful place,'' I say ''but does one person need this entire place? You could probably fit 100 dorms in here.'' He shrugs as he takes something out from one of the cabinets.

''No one was staying here,'' he says filling a glass of water, ''so why not? If no one was using it, then I can use it.'' He says while taking a sip of his drink. ''You're dad is on the tenth floor if you were wondering,'' he says walking over to the huge L-shaped couch. I had totally forgotten that he was even staying here.

''He liked you,'' I say as I sit down on across from where he's sitting.

''I'm glad to hear that,'' he says leaning forward towards me, even though we're rather far apart. ''We should Skype my parents now that you're here,'' he says standing up and coming back a few seconds later with a laptop in his hands. He sits back down in his original spot, and looks over at me and pats the space beside him on the couch.

''Christian I'd rather not…'' I say looking out the big window. Thinking about how bad it went last time I met one of his parents, I don't really want to ruin my day with seeing both of them. ''They won't like me,'' I whisper.

''They will, when they get to know you, they are just a little protective'' he says giving me a reassuring smile. ''Just a few minutes, Ana, my dad has been bugging me about meeting you, so now that you're here why not?'' I nod my head slightly, and walk over to where he's sitting and sit down beside him. He puts the computer down on the table in front of us, and he calls his dad on Skype. It doesn't take long until I see his mother and a man that I'm assuming is his father. It's almost like this was planned, since they both answered. ''Mom, dad'' he says.

''Hi, sweetie'' Grace says to Christian. ''Anastasia, good to see you again,'' she says with the same harsh, cold formal voice she used the last time she saw me.

''You too, Mrs. Grey'' I say with a smile, hoping I can at least win Christian's dad over. But he's looking at me, or maybe at Christian I'm really not sure, with narrowed eyes. ''You must be Carrick,'' I say remembering that I overheard Christian and Grace mention that name last time. ''It's nice to meet you.''

''Yes, likewise'' he says with the same harsh tone his wife has. I don't think I'm winning anyone over tonight. I sigh lightly, and look up at Christian, and he looks just as nervous as I feel. ''Christian, may we speak to you alone for a second?'' he asks.

''Whatever you need to say you can say in front of Ana, she's a really nice girl, just give her a chance,'' he says with an almost pleading tone. His parents look at each other, and gently shake their heads.

''You haven't drafted a prenup, and you're walking into this marriage with a lot of money, Christian. While she has nothing but her student loans to contribute to your union.'' I know that he's right, and it's utterly humiliating. ''And when this marriage goes under, which it will, she will end up with a lot of money that she should not have.'' He says angrily. ''This was obviously her intentions from the beginning Christian, use your head.''

''Excuse me,'' I say finally finding my voice so I could speak up for myself, since it doesn't look like Christian is going to. ''I don't care about his money. In fact, I didn't even know who he was when I first met him let alone what his occupation is.'' I say ''and he asked me! He asked me to marry him, and I said yes, not because of his money but because of _him!_'' I'm shocked about how true that statement actually is. It wasn't his money that made me say yes, no matter how drunk I was, it was Christian, it had to be.

''Are you gay, sweetie?'' Grace asks with a hint of concern in her voice. ''If she's your alibi for not being gay, that's okay. We won't judge you if you are.''

'' Excuse me!'' he says, raising his voice. ''I'm not gay!'' He says furiously.

''Sweetie, we support you…''

Christian lifts his hands to my face and turns it towards him, as he crushes his lips to mine. It starts off hard, but after a few seconds he slows down, and gently probes my mouth open with his tongue as it slides inside my mouth, connecting with my tongue. I look nervously at the screen, and both of his parents have their mouths hanging open. ''That is enough, Christian.'' they both say at the same time. But Christian doesn't stop, he continues stroking my tongue with his, and I let him. We sit like that for what feels like ages, wonderful ages. I look over at the screen again and see that his parents have disconnected.

Christian gently pushes me down on the couch, so that he's hovering over me as he continues to kiss me, never taking his lips off some place on my face or neck. He trails kisses from my mouth, to my jaw, and then to my neck. His hands trail from waist up to the outline of my breasts. He kisses his way back to my mouth as he gently squeezes my boob. I moan into his mouth and I can feel his smile against my lips. I close my eyes and enjoy what he's doing to me. I know this is wrong, a part of me knows that, but I just don't want to stop him.

He trails kisses down from my mouth again, but doesn't stop at my neck this time. He lips are off me for a second, and I lie there panting and waiting for him to continue. When I'm about to open my eyes again, he leans down and kisses my breast through my shirt. I gasp as he lightly bites down on my nipple. ''Christian'' I whisper, and he looks up at me and I look down at him through heavy lids.

He moves up again and kisses my mouth hard and franticly. And this time he pushes his hips towards mine, and I feel his erection digging in me at just the right spot. He thrust toward me in the same rhythm as he's kissing me, and he is panting with me. ''Don't stop,'' I whisper as he starts kissing my jaw line.

''Never,'' he pant back. He slows his hips down for a second, and he leans his head back from mine, looking down at me with a smile on his face. He starts moving his hips again, still looking down at me and I close my eyes again and lean my head back. ''Come, Ana'' he whispers. He moves his hips faster and faster, and pushes himself down harder and harder, until I scream out his name. He leans down and kisses my neck, as I pant and try to get my breath back.


	9. Chapter 9

**CHRISTIAN**

I wake up disoriented and warm and itchy. I run my hand over my face, to get rid of the itchy feeling and I notice that the cause of the itchiness is Ana's hair all over my face. She's lying beside me, still asleep looking very peaceful. She's lying with her arm under her head, and she has a little smile on her lips. What I would give to know what she's dreaming about right now.

I grab my phone from the nightstand and see that it is already 8 o'clock; we've both slept through my alarm. That's a first; I've never slept through one, most of the time I wake up before the alarm. I lay back down carefully, trying not to wake Ana up. I lie on my side and just look at her.

I don't know what made me do what I did yesterday. One second my parents accused Ana of being after my money, and then they accused her of being my gay alibi. The plan was just to give Ana a kiss that would show my parents that I was attracted to Ana, which I am. But when my lips touched hers, I couldn't stop and it all just happened from there.

I've never dry humped anyone before, I've never needed to, but it was not terrible. And to see the look on Ana's face, to see how much she enjoyed it; that was amazing. I'm glad she came when she did, I don't think I could've continued much longer without coming myself. She quickly fell asleep on the couch afterwards, and I carried her into my bed and changed her clothes, and then walking into the shower to take care of my needs.

The next time I look at my phone it's 8:30, so I figure that I should probably wake her up, so she doesn't freak out when she realizes she has a limited time to get ready. But Ana doesn't really strike me as the type of person who worries too much about that. I can't imagine her standing hours in front of a mirror trying on different eye shadow or various hair styles. She doesn't need to use hours in front of the mirror, she is just naturally beautiful, and it would be a shame to hide that under a ton of makeup.

I lean over her and try to gently shake her awake, but she doesn't budge. ''Ana'' I whisper directly in her ear, and her hands immediately go to my head and push me away from her. I stroke her cheek with my knuckle and feel her soft skin; she stirs but doesn't wake up. I straddle her lap, and she suddenly jerks awake. ''Good, you're up'' I say as I roll of her, and back to my side.

''Did I fall asleep?'' she asks, yawning and rubbing her eyes and I nod at her. ''Did you put these clothes on?'' She asks, as she realizes that she's in my t-shirt and a pair of my boxers. I nod and get out of the bed, to retrieve the bag of clothes I asked Taylor to get Ana, from the living room. I carry the clothes in for her and set them beside her on the bed. I then walk into the bathroom to start getting ready. Before I turn the shower on though, I turn around to ask if she likes what's in the bag when I catch her checking me out. The second she notices the smirk on my face she blushes.

She looks down in the bag, and groans. ''What?'' I ask, as I walk back into the room, she holds up her hand to cover my body from her sight, I'm only in my boxers and since she noticed she hasn't stopped blushing. ''You don't like it? I can get Taylor to buy you something else,'' I say walking towards my phone on the bed.

''No, that's not necessary.'' She says lifting each item out of the bag, ''I'm paying you back for this,'' she says as she gets up and walk past me into the bathroom. I walk after her into the bathroom and she shrieks ''Christian! Out!''

''What? I wasn't done here yet,'' I say walking over to the toilet and lifting the lit. She groans as she exits the bathroom. I wouldn't mind sharing the bathroom, it's big enough for both of us, but she only returns when I'm done.

''What do you want for breakfast?'' I ask her as she walks out of the bedroom. She shakes her head, and takes the seat in front of me, taking a sip of her tea.

''I need to hurry home,'' she says looking longingly at the food in front of her.

''Eat,'' I say and she picks up a croissant.

''You should've driven me back home yesterday,'' she says opening one of the papers on the table. ''I shouldn't have come,'' she mutters.

''I'm glad you did,'' I don't know what she's talking about, but no matter what part of yesterday she meant, I didn't mind it happening. Well besides Ana walking in on Katherine and Elliot, _that_ I did mind. I'll have to call him later about that. I look back up at her, and she's looking at me with a frown, which I return with a smirk.

''You're such a guy,'' she says rolling her eyes.

''Been called way worse,'' I say ''Do you need a ride home?'' she nods, and walks over to the entrance to get her shoes and jacket. We walk down to the underground garage and I help her into the car, then walk over to the other side and sit in the back with her. She frowns for a second, but then Taylor get's in the car. Almost the whole ride back to her apartment is in silence.

I take her hands in mine, ''Ana I am glad you called me yesterday, you should call me if there is anything you need...And I'm sorry if I embarrassed you in front of my parents,'' the car stops and I see that we're outside her apartment complex. ''I shouldn't have done that,'' I continue ''but don't be ashamed of what happened after that.'' I let go of her hands and she gives me a weak smile before heading out of the car, before I can get out and help her. I lean back in my seat and sigh, and meet Taylor's eyes in the rearview mirror. I roll my eyes, and he chuckles. Then we drive back to the hotel.

**ANA**

I walk up the stairs to my apartment, and I knock before I take my keys and open the door. Kate is standing right in front of the door with her arms crossed over her chest. ''Where the fuck have you been? I've worried sick about you,'' she says pointing her finger at me. ''You didn't even answer your calls.''

''My phone,'' I say taking it out of my pocket ''is dead'' I say looking at the black screen. ''Sorry.''

''Where, have you been?'' She half cries half screams, ''I thought you were dead or something.'' Right then Elliot emerges from Kate's room, in his boxers with his phone in his other hand.

''She was with Christian,'' he says looking down at his phone. ''He's pissed about her walking in on us,'' he looks up and gives me the same smirk he had yesterday. ''Told you she was fine… She just saw what we were doing and wanted to do the same.''

''God,'' I sigh ''we didn't do anything,'' well that's a lie, but compared to what he thinks we did, we really didn't do anything. ''I just didn't have a place to go, so I called him… since he's my husband and all,'' I say as an afterthought.

''Well you better hurry; we're out of here in 30'' Kate says walking angrily into her room. I look at her door stunned, what did I do to piss her off? And besides, I'm not riding with them. Kate has to be there earlier because she's giving a speech, so I have longer than 30 minutes, in fact I'm waiting for my dad.

''She'll get over it,'' Elliot says walking past me and into the kitchen ''it's not you she's mad at, sorry she took it out on you.''

''What happened?'' I ask, walking after him and filling a glass with water.

''Not really sure,'' he says with a shrug. ''Everything was fine one second and the next she was pissed.''

''She's probably just stressed, with the graduation and moving,'' I say looking at all the boxes around the apartment. ''So unless you called her something, or hit her I don't think you did anything wrong either.'' I say with a reassuring smile.

''Hopefully,'' he mutters. ''Sorry about yesterday, we should've thought that you could've come home.'' He looks down at his watch, ''you should probably get dressed too.'' I nod and walk into my bedroom.

I walk out of my bedroom 15 minutes later. I had already showered at Christian's hotel and I had put the dress that Kate lent me yesterday on my bed, so it was all ready to just be slipped on. I French braided my hair to get it out of my face.

Elliot is standing by the couch with jeans and a t-shirt, waiting for Kate and I ''you look nice,'' he says smiling at me.

''Thank you, so do you. Have you talked with Christian?'' I ask, walking over to the couch to stand beside him.

''Yeah… he yelled at me, but that's nothing new. And he told me to drive you carefully over to the graduation, because I can sometimes be a wreck-less driver'' he says with a chuckle. ''He cares about you, that's a good step, right?'' He asks, and I nod. Both Kate and Elliot know that Christian and I don't know each other, but are trying to make things work. And I think Elliot, more than Kate, really wants our marriage to work. I just hope that after the divorce Elliot and I can still be friends.

''Yes, and I care about him.'' I say, which is not a lie. I _do_ care about him, even though I'm mad and sad and confused about this situation most of the time, I've really grown to care for him and I hope we can be friends. He's my first, so of course I care about him, I don't think that'll ever change.

''Good,'' he says and then Kate walks into the living room, and Elliot goes to her and pulls her into his arms, and kisses her. He whispers something in her ear that makes her blush, then his lips are on hers again. I turn away, embarrassed to be staring at their private moment. And for a second I find myself wishing that Christian would greet me like that when he saw me, but I know that he wouldn't ever do that. ''Are you ready to go Ana?'' I turn around and see them looking at me, with loving smiles on both of their faces.

''No, Ray is picking me up since it's still too early for me to head over… but I'll see you both there.'' I say walking over to Kate, giving her a hug and telling her how amazing she looks. ''Love you,'' I say as they walk out the door.

I sit down at the couch and think about yesterday as I wait for dad.

Dad pulls his car into the parking lot at campus, and we follow the stream of students and their families and friends. When we get closer to the gym, Ray turns to me and gives me a tight hug. ''Good luck, Annie, I can't believe my baby girl is graduating college,'' he says with a smile and kisses my cheek as we part ways.

The gym is crowded; so it is difficult to make my way to my new seat with all the G's. But I find my seat and wait for it to begin. Although, all I can think about is that Christian is here and he'll be handing out my diploma. My heart is pounding at the thought of it. The auditorium fills quickly, and there are voices talking everywhere.

**CHRISTIAN**

At precisely 11 o'clock, the chancellor walks onto the stage, followed by 3 vice chancellors and then the professors. I hear applause from where I'm standing behind the stage, waiting to walk on the stage and start my speech. Then Katherine walks out and I follow after her. I try not to think about Ana sitting out there somewhere and instead concentrate on why I'm here.

The chancellor stands and starts his speech. I look over the crowd and in a second my eyes meet with Ana's. She squirms under my stare, and I love it. A pink color appears on her cheek, and she looks away shyly.

After Katherine is done with her speech it's my turn. I stand up with my eyes still on Ana. Throughout my speech I see Ana getting more and more surprised with what I am saying. As I talk about helping hunger in 3rd world countries, and that I'm talking out of experience, I see her shocked expression, because that hasn't been something we've talked about yet. I turn my gaze away from Ana, and look over at the other people in the crowd as I finish my speech. When I'm done with my speech and met with applause, my eyes find their way back to Ana's and I smile briefly at her.

One of the vice chancellors rises and begins the long process of reading up names of the graduates. One after another I hand the graduates their diplomas, shake their hands and congratulate them. They told me that there are over 400 diplomas to be given out today, but there's only one I want to hand out.

I hear the vice chancellor calling ''Anastasia Grey,'' and I can't help the smile that appears on my face. I see her making her way up the stage, and walk towards me.

''Congratulations, Mrs. Grey'' I smile at her and hand her, her diploma. She extends her hand for me to shake, but I ignore it and lean in to kiss her on her cheek. ''Wait for me afterwards,'' I whisper into her ear and she nods. I watch her as she walks back to her seat, and I see a few shocked glares pointed at Ana, particularly from the students sitting around Ana.

When the ceremony is done, the chancellor leads the faculty members off the stage. When we're all off the stage, I turn to Kate and ask her if she can find Ana to bring her to me because I want to see her. After awhile of waiting and neither one of them having returned, I walk into the crowd to look for her myself. I find her immediately, talking to her stepfather.

I start walking towards her, but stop in my track when I see a blonde guy running towards her lifting her up and spinning her around. She squeals and steadies herself by holding onto his upper arms. I start walking faster towards her to find out who this prick is who is touching what is mine. ''Dad, this is Ethan, Kate's brother'' she says introducing him to her father. The way he is looking at her tells me one thing; he wants to fuck her. Well, that position is already taken. I halt my progress immediately when that thought occurs to me.

I see Ana looking nervously over Mr. Kavanaugh's shoulder and when she sees me, she gives me a little smile. I walk behind her, and place one hand on her waist and then kiss her on her cheek. The blonde guy stops speaking and looks questioningly at me.

''Ethan,'' Kate says, when she realizes the looks passing between me and her brother. ''This is Christian, Ana's husband'' his eyes widen when she says husband. ''Christian, this is my _brother, _Ethan,'' she emphasizes 'brother', as if that makes him immune to Ana's beauty, or my anger.

''Nice to meet you Mr. Grey, that was a very nice speech,'' he says extending his hand to me, and I shake it with a rather tight grip. Ana turns her head to look at me, and stand on her tiptoes giving me a gentle kiss at the corner of my mouth. I'm surprised at the gesture, but enjoy it and hope that maybe this dickhead gets it into his head that she's taken.

''I need to go,'' I say as I turn Ana away from the others. ''A few things came up that I need to take care of, can we meet later? My hotel or your apartment?'' I ask.

''The apartment,'' she smiles. I give her a chaste kiss on her lips and she turns back around again. I fish my phone out of my pocket and text Taylor, saying I need one hell of an exercise right now.

I knock on Ana's door, and I hear laughter coming from inside her apartment. She opens the door with a huge smile on her face, ''Christian!'' she squeals hugging me. Is she drunk or just extremely excited to see me? I walk in after her, steadying her by holding onto her waist. We walk into the kitchen and I see Kate, Elliot, the photographer and Ethan, sitting at the kitchen table with many shot glass in the middle of the table. ''We're playing 'never have I ever' come play with us,'' she says sitting down on one of the chairs.

''I'd rather not,'' I say leaning on the kitchen counter.

''Then you have to go,'' Kate says and Ana sends her a dirty glare.

''I'm not leaving Ana like this,'' I say looking down at the giggling Ana who seems like she's falling asleep while standing.

''Just a few rounds, _please_'' she whines. Last time she whined at me like that we got married. I sigh and walk behind her chair lifting her up then sitting back down again with her on my lap. She giggles and hides her head in the crook of my neck. This is nothing like the Ana I've gotten to know over the past days. ''Thank you,'' she whisper into my ear, and I'm pretty sure she can feel my hard on now ''it means much to me'' she smiles. She turns around slightly and wiggles a little, and then she giggles and looks back at me with a knowing smile. ''Your turn Jose,'' she says towards the photographer.

''Never have I ever…'' he says thinking for a moment. The last time I saw him I had to push him off Ana and am just barely resisting the urge to punch him. ''Had a threesome,'' he says, and both Elliot and Ethan picks up a shot glass, which makes Kate groan and Ana giggle. She's apparently an extreme giggler when she's drunk.

''Never have I ever,'' Kate says ''fooled around in a sibling's room.'' And again both Elliot and Ethan takes a shot, clink it together before tilting their heads upward taking it all in. Kate groans again, ''this is childish,'' she mutters.

''Never have I ever,'' Elliot says looking around at us ''done 'the walk of shame' in the morning,'' and both Kate and Ana reach for a glass. I feel a pang in my chest; did she feel that after one of our times? Was she ashamed of the things we had done together?

''Never have I ever,'' I say smirking at Elliot ''walked in on my parents doing _it_'' he groans and leans forward to take another shot glass, so does Kate and Ethan.

''Never have I ever,'' Ana says sweetly and leaning her head back towards my chest. ''Kissed someone of the same sex'' she says with a giggle. And Kate and Elliot again take a shot. I look over at Elliot shocked and when his eyes meet mine he just shrugs. How is it that Elliot, who takes a shot every round, is not drunk while Ana is, even though she's probably only taken one?

''Never have I ever,'' Ethan says ''had sex with a virgin,'' I'm surprised when I'm the only one leaning forward taking a shot, and Ana blushes and giggles. I look over at Elliot with a raised eyebrow, and he groans and takes a shot. Elliot hasn't had sex with one virgin; but he did do it with 2 at the same time. I know because he had to call me right after they left because he needed a ride.

It's Jose's turn again, and he thinks for a while before smirking. ''Never have I ever measured my penis.'' I can't help contain my laughter when Ana leans forward to take a shot. Everyone is looking at her curiously.

''What?! If I had one I would've,'' she slurs and everyone burst out laughing. I shake my head and take this as a cue that Ana needs to sleep. I stand up with Ana in my hands and walk towards her bedroom. ''Good night!'' she shouts to everyone right in my ear.

I walk into her bedroom closing the door behind me and gently lay Ana down on her bed. ''You need to sleep this of,'' I say as I lift her arms up to take her out of the dress she's still in. My dick stands to attention when I realize that she doesn't have a bra on under the dress. Ana is too drunk to care.

''Do you think I'm beautiful?'' Ana asks, looking down at her body. I lift her chin so that her eyes meet mine.

''Yes,'' I say smiling at her. She grins up at me and leans forward to kiss me. She takes my hand in hers and leads it toward her breasts. ''Ana, you're drunk'' I say getting off the bed. ''I'm not doing anything while you're drunk.'' She pouts and looks down at her chest again. ''I should probably go,'' I say.

''No, don't. I'm sorry, no funny business. I promise,'' she says giggling. ''Please just stay here with me,'' she says sweetly smiling. I look around her room and see that she has nothing in it except a few boxes here and there.

I lift my t shirt of my head. ''Here,'' I say walking towards her ''wear this.'' She takes it out of my hands and slips it over her head. I pull off my jeans and lift the covers up on her bed and slip in beside her. ''Sleep,'' I whisper in her ear, and she snuggles closer to me and I wrap my arms over her. ''Sleep, sweet, sweet Anastasia'' I whisper and she murmurs something I can't hear before she falls asleep.


	10. Chapter 10

**ANA**

I'm shocked when I wake up. Christian is lying on his back, with me snuggled into his side, halfway on his chest. The area he specifically told me not to touch. I start to examine his chest from where I am laying without lifting my head; so as not to wake him. I see a few circular scars on his chest. With the hand on his chest I gently feel his scars. I wonder how they got there; did he have chicken pox as a kid?

I feel him stir under my head, and a struggled groan escapes his lips, so I lift my head before I get caught with it on his chest. I sit up and rub my eyes, while my eyes adjust to the light flowing in my window. I look down and see that I'm in Christian's t-shirt, and as I lift the covers slightly and see that he's only in his boxers.

I let out a groan as I feel my head pounding. What happened yesterday? When did he get over here? Did I invite him to bed or did he invite himself? God knows, and I won't get any answers until he's awake. I get out of bed, and the second my feet hit on the floor I am running to the bathroom and I immediately throw up.

I suddenly feel strong arms around me, stroking my back and holding my hair up. I can tell that it's Christian from the way he's touching me, and the familiar sparks I feel in his presence. I continue to hurl, and I feel my face go red in embarrassment. I let out a strangled cry, which is so low that I almost don't hear it, but Christian does.

''Shhh,'' he soothes while he continues to stroke my back up and down with his hand ''its okay,'' he whispers. When I've emptied my stomach, I dry my mouth with my hands and stands up. Christian stands up with me and steadies me in case I'm off balance. I walk over to the sink, and take my tooth brush out and begin to brush my teeth. I meet Christian's stare in the mirror, and he looks apologetic at me, almost like he's done something wrong.

''What?'' I ask when he doesn't stop looking at me sadly. But all he does is shake his head and leave the bathroom. I finish brushing my teeth and washing my hands, before I go out to figure out what happened yesterday.

* * *

><p><strong>CHRISTIAN<strong>

'The walk of shame' comment taunts me as I looked after Anastasia this morning. Did she mean that, or did she just want another shot? If she meant it, I'm sure it was with me, it has to be me, because she's never been with anyone else.

I just don't understand. Our first time, we were drunk and we didn't really have the nicest day after that, but does that count as a 'walk of shame'? Our second time was a mutual decision; I thought she wanted that as much as I did, so if that's the 'walk of shame' she was referring about then I will be fucking pissed. Of course it ended with my mother walking into my apartment pretty quickly after we had sex, but my mom didn't know that's what we were doing. Then there's the dry humping, we never talked about that, but why would she be ashamed of it? _She's probably just ashamed of you; _my subconscious tries to tell me.

I walk back into Ana's bedroom and find my jeans lying on the floor, so I grab them and put them on. I look around for my t-shirt just as Ana walks in and I remember that I put it on her last night. She finds a little bag under her bed, and places it on her bed, not saying a word to me. She takes out a bra, sweater and jeans, and then she walks out of the bedroom again.

Is she pissed at me? What reason does she have to be pissed? None. I haven't done anything wrong; I put her to bed last night when things got out of hand at the shot table, and if I may say so myself, I haven't been anything but nice towards her. Well nicer than I normally am towards people. If my business partners saw the way I treated Ana, they would probably get a heart attack. Even Ros hasn't seen that side of me, and we spend most of our days together, working side by side on projects.

It's no secret amongst businessmen that I am ruthless, and I don't try to sugar coat anything, I don't see the point in that. When I was a child I was always angry or confused, and only my mom and Mia ever made me smile. Now Anastasia has too, which is shocking, but I've made her smile also, and I fucking love it. I love the way her whole face lights up as her smile consumes her entire face.

Seeing her yesterday, free and careless, was… I don't know. I was pissed as hell over the fact that she had gotten drunk, and that the others didn't do anything. She was already prettily drunk when I got here, and Kate should've put her to bed long before I arrived. But seeing how happy she was, and how much she wanted me to join the fun, and that she whispered in my ear and told me how much it meant to her, it was...freeing.

I feel like I need a heavy session with Flynn, this whole situation is confusing me so much. I lust after her, that's the truth. I've loved the times I've had her beneath me and if she walked into her bedroom again right this second asking for me to fuck her, I wouldn't even think twice about it. But I care about Ana, and besides my family I've never cared about anyone before. The thought of her driving with Kate to Seattle bothers me; she should be driving back with me, where I know she is safe.

No. I need Flynn to explain these emotions to me. To help me see what's going on with me.

* * *

><p><strong>ANA<strong>

I walk back into the bedroom after I've gotten dressed, and throw Christian's t-shirt at him. He grabs it and slips it over his head. ''I need to get back to Seattle…'' he says, and I nod. ''I'm needed back, I've been here far too long.'' He explains, and he motions me to follow him into the living room. ''I'll have everything set up and ready for you. I'll see you tomorrow, right?'' I nod, and then frown. Have everything set up, what's there to set up? I'm about to ask him, when he stops me. ''Don't worry, we'll take our IKEA trip, I promised didn't I?''

I nod and walk into the kitchen to grab a glass of orange juice, my head is killing me. ''Kate and I'll be driving up tomorrow at noon. I'll probably go to her apartment, and help her carry everything and set everything up. I'll call when I know anything.'' I say, wondering how I will get to his place since I don't know where it is, and I don't have a car to drive anymore. Wanda said goodbye recently and there was nothing more that could be done for her, as the problem was she refused to start.

''Yeah, just call and I'll send Taylor for you. Ehm… I uh, I have contacted a psychiatrist for you. She will see you Monday morning, if that doesn't fit, we can change the day or time?'' He says looking uneasy.

''No, Monday morning's fine.'' I say crossing my arms over my middle. ''Guess I'll see you around?'' His lips rise at one side of his mouth, not in a smirk, but an amused smile. I like it, it suits him.

''Yes, tomorrow'' he confirms. ''Take some Advil, you had quite the night, last night'' he says with a smirk. Then he leans in, and I'm sure he's about to kiss me. But he goes for my ear, and whisper in a seductive voice. ''I know you don't have one, but if you want to, you can always measure mine'' he says with a chuckle before heading for the hall and walking out of the apartment.

What did he mean by that? Did I say anything inappropriate yesterday? I walk into Kate's bedroom, and both Kate and Elliot are still asleep. They're both sleeping on opposite sides of the bed with their backs turned to each other. They must be still fighting, about whatever made Kate mad.

Not caring about the fact that Elliot is lying in Kate's bed, most likely in his underwear; I jump into her bed, and lie down between them. Elliot rolls over and drapes his arm over my body, and I stiffen. ''Morning, sis'' he whispers ''tired of my brother's ass already and decided to switch to the better brother?'' he teases and I see a smile on his face ''you've definitely come to the right place.''

''Pig,'' I say lifting his arm of off me, and throwing it back at him. ''Can someone please tell me what happened last night?'' I ask, as I stare up at the ceiling. I feel Kate move, and when I look over at her, she has a huge grin at her face. ''Please tell me what I said.''

''You were our entertainment,'' Elliot says and tickles me on my ribs.

''If you say I was stripping, I might have a heart attack.'' I say looking at them both, first at Elliot then at Kate, and then at Elliot again. ''Please say that my clothes stayed on.''

''While you were with us yes, but we don't know what you and Christian did afterwards.'' Kate says, and Elliot mumbles his agreement. ''We played 'never have I ever'. Does that ring a bell?'' She asks, and I nod my head. ''Remember Christian joining us?'' When did he join in? I shake my head and she laughs. ''Well you found your spot at his lap, and looked really friendly with him. And you wouldn't stop giggling, I think Christian was into it.'' God, I can't remember that.

''Why are you wondering? Did Christian say something to you?'' Elliot asks, and I nod my head and blush.

''I didn't understand what he meant, though'' I say and both Elliot and Kate prop themselves up on their elbows and look down at me in the middle. ''He said something like, 'since you don't have one, you can measure mine' or something like that?'' I say, trying to mimic Christian's voice. And they both fall back on their backs laughing hysterically. ''What? What did he mean by that?'' I ask, feeling quite defensively.

''Jose… h he… and you… and…'' Kate tries to say something through her laughter. ''You say it Elliot'' she says as she continues to laugh.

''Geez, give me a second'' he says as he tries to get his breath back. ''When it was Jose's turn, he said 'never have I ever measured my penis' and guess who took a shot'' he says looking at me waiting for my answer. OMG! Did I make a comment about Christian's penis? When I don't answer he continues. ''You took a shot, and said if you had one you would have measured it, you were really out of it'' he says and goes back to laughing.

''That's when Christian decided you've had enough for the day'' Kate laughs. ''But talking about Penises, how is Christian in that department?''

''Kate, ewwwww, that's my brother'' Elliot says covering his ears. He rolls out of bed, in only his boxers of course, and heads out in search of the bathroom, I think.

''Well…'' Kate says, sitting up in her bed, and I sit up with her. ''Come on Ana, is he big?''

''I don't have anything to compare it too, you know that'' I say and Kate doesn't look very happy about my answer. ''I don't know, I haven't seen much'' I say trying to get off the bed, but she pulls me back. ''Between 8 or 9 inches maybe? Are you happy?'' I ask, and her eyes widen.

''Jesus Steele, you've hit the jackpot with that one. Good for you'' she says with a loving smile.

''I'll see you both in Seattle tomorrow,'' Elliot says as he walks over to Kate and kiss her on her cheek.

''You'll be fine, right?'' He asks us both but only looks at Kate; she nods up at him and smiles. I know my best friend and I've received many smiles from her, this one is not a happy Kate smile. There's something on her mind that's been bothering her. ''Okay, bye baby'' he says and peck her mouth.

Kate doesn't say goodbye back, but instead turn away from him. He looks sad for a moment then he shakes it off and walks to the door. ''Bye, Elliot see you soon'' I say with a smile, and he nod sadly before he leaves.

Kate stands at the same spot for what seems like ages after he leaves. It's only seconds really, but I can see that my friend is hurt by something. I walk over to her and hug her. She falls against my chest and a few tears slip out of her eyes. We sit down at the couch and she dries her eyes, and smiles like nothing happened.

''Kate,'' I sigh ''please tell me what's going on. Let me help you… what is bothering you?'' I ask and I start rubbing her back to sooth her. She shakes her head and smiles at me, but she's not kidding anyone but herself. ''I know you Kate'' I whisper, and she sighs and looks down at her lap.

''I'm late,'' she chokes, and I can see how scared she looks.

''As in…?'' I ask, even though I don't have to. She nods and bites her lip to stop from trembling. ''What are you going to do about it?'' I ask, and she shrugs. ''Have you told Elliot? You know he wouldn't…''

''He wouldn't what?'' she snaps, ''please tell me what he wouldn't do. Because I know he will leave me, and never look back.'' She cries.

''If Elliot's the father…''

''Ana'' she sighs. ''I haven't known him long enough for him to be the father. And he wouldn't stay with me if he knew I was having another man's baby'' she cries.

''Let's take a test…'' I say. ''Maybe you're just late, let's not tell him anything until we know for sure.'' She nods her head, and leans her head on my shoulder. ''I'll go get one,'' I say looking down at my watch ''I still have time. Where's your car keys'' she nods her head in their direction, and I take them in my hand. ''Will you be okay for 15 minutes? We can just wait until we get to Seattle?'' I say but she shakes her head.

''No, we need to do this know'' she stands up and walks towards me. ''I'm going with you. But you drive'' she says and we walk out together.

* * *

><p>''OMG'' Kate sighs as we look at the ocean of different pregnancy tests. ''Which one?'' she asks me and I shrug. When it comes to pregnancy tests I have no idea what to choose. ''I'll take 3 different ones… If the result is the same, then I have my answer.'' I nod and give her a reassuring smile.<p>

We walk to the register and Kate pays for the pregnancy tests. The lady shows us a toilet in the back of the store, and we walk in. Kate sits down not even embarrassed about the fact that I'm standing there. I sit down on the floor and wait for Kate to do her thing. She lays the 3 pregnancy tests by the sink, and sits down next to me.

''Can I ask you a question?'' I ask.

''I don't know'' she answer without me having to ask the question I was about to ask. ''There are 2 guys it could be… Arghhh!'' She says and hides her face in her hands. ''I'm such a whore.''

''No you're not. Don't ever say something like that'' I say sternly at her and she gives me a weak smile, and I see tears forming in her eyes.

''You'll make a great mom, one day Ana'' she smiles at me. ''I can't be pregnant. My parents will stop all income and not even regret it, you know how my parents are'' she sighs. ''They've always said that Ethan and I don't even have to think about kids before we're married. They'll be so disappointed in me.''

''Oh, Katie'' I say rubbing her back again. ''They won't. And you would make an amazing mother, you would be strict when you have to, and your kid would be so lucky getting a mom like you. And if you're pregnant then I'm here for you. I will always be here for you Kate'' I say. Then I remember what we were doing last night and ask, ''If you knew you were late, why did you drink those shots last night?''

She snorts. ''I made a few for myself with water. Aren't I pathetic? I'm just glad no one took them.'' She snorts again, and shakes her head like she can't believe she did that. ''Can you please look at the tests'' she chokes; I nod as I stand up.

''Everything will be okay,'' I say before looking at the tests and she nods. I walk over to the sink and watch the 3 different sticks. I turn to her, and give her a weak smile. ''They're negative'' she jumps up and hugs me.

''Thank god… I feel super bad for feeling like this, in case there was a baby in here'' she says holding her stomach. ''But I'm so happy,'' she says with a smile.

''I get that; a baby isn't in your near future. You want a job and a stable life before you start thinking about a family.''

''I need alcohol, like now.'' She says loudly as we walk out of the bathroom, and the lady at register smiles at us both.


	11. Chapter 11

**ANA**

''Ana wake up! Happy moving day!'' Kate says in a sing-song voice as she opens my door. ''I've brought breakfast. I even made you a cup of tea, so let's eat and get moving.'' I open one of my eyes to look up at her, and she's smiling brightly at me. ''Come on,'' she whines and walks over to my bed and starts to push me out of it. ''You're moving in with your husband, he's probably missing you.''

He's probably not actually; I bet he hates this as much as I do. But I have to put on a show for Kate, I promised Christian I would do that. ''Yes,'' I say as happily as I can ''I'm up.'' I get up and change out of my pajamas, and pack the rest of the items in my room into the renaming boxes, and then I walk out into the kitchen. That's when I see Kate's tower of cheeseburgers from McDonalds. ''Are you serious?'' I whine, and she grins and nods.

''Yeah, don't you miss these'' she asks taking a bite of one. She closes her eyes and lets out a moan. ''You're married now, so you don't have to worry about your form. And I have a boyfriend who I… well I'm not worrying about my form either.'' She says and takes another bite, which is followed by another moan. ''Come on, Ana, only today. Let's think of it as a good bye to this place'' I roll my eyes and take one of the burgers in my hand.

''Not exactly breakfast, but they're good'' I say as I take a bite ''a little bit dry, don't you think?'' She pushes a pack of ketchup towards me, but doesn't respond because she has her mouth full of burger. I open the cheeseburger and squeeze the pack of ketchup on it. It's completely disgusting, but also so delicious at the same time. I wonder what Christian would say if he saw this? I can't imagine him at McDonalds, or really anything that's not fancy. I'm sure even his burgers are fancy.

''Hurry up'' Kate says when she's done chewing and lifting up another cheeseburger into her mouth. ''We need to get going soon, I wanna see my man'' she says with a loving smile and a wink. I walk over to the kitchen counter and grab the tea she made for me, and drink it while we eat the burgers. ''All done'' she says.

She goes to her room and returns a few seconds later with her bag. The rest of our stuff is either being shipped or is already in boxes in Kate's car. Most of my stuff isn't going anywhere, I'm only really taking my personal items. I get rid of all the burger wrappers and proceed to clean off the counter for one last time.

''You know,'' Kate says looking at me ''my parents did order someone to clean this place up, you don't have to do that.''

''I know'' I say putting my shoes on ''but this is my last chance to clean here.'' I smile at her. ''I've had the best years ever here with you Katie, I will miss it. So many breakups we've had, mostly yours, in this apartment and so many "I hate boys" nights. And all those "I'm freaking out" days over tests and boys and families, I will miss it'' I say and tears start to form in her eyes.

''Aw! Annie, you're making me cry'' she says wiping the tears away that were forming under her eye. ''I will miss this place too. And I will miss living with you'' that's when tears begin to form in my eyes. ''Let's get out of here, before we both burst into tears and never leave'' she says, and then we walk out and lock the door of our apartment for the last time.

* * *

><p>''You drive'' Kate says throwing her keys at me. I catch them and get behind the wheel. I love driving Kate's car, it's just so new and so… not Wanda, who I will miss immensely, but her time is done and I have accepted that.<p>

We start driving, and Kate grabs the Bluetooth and types in Elliot's number to call him. We hear a lot of background noise and then Elliot's voice saying, ''Hey babe, I'm at work so I can't talk long'' he says.

''Do you have a few minutes?'' Kate asks, and I feel bad for listening in to their conversation. I know it's Kate's fault since she just called on the Bluetooth connected to the car, but it still just doesn't feel right.

''Yeah sure, give me a sec'' he says and the noise get's louder and louder until we hear a door shut and then the noise is barely noticeable. ''Hey, what's up'' he asks. He sounds wary, like he's afraid of who he's talking to; pissed off Kate, sweet Kate, or crazy Kate. But I guess that he's been talking to all the Kate since she noticed that she was late.

''Hey baby, I miss you'' she says.

''I miss you too. Have you left yet?'' He asks, and Kate explains where we are. All she had to say was that we had just left, but I guess she wants to prolong their conversation. ''I can maybe get off work, if things run smoothly here. Call me when you're in Tacoma and I'll see what I can do.'' He says and I look quickly over at Kate, and the smile she has on her face is indescribable. I guess my little Kate finally has deep feelings for someone.

''Elliot… I want to apologize for the way I have treated you lately'' he starts to say something but Kate stops him. ''Just listen to me okay? I'm sorry and I shouldn't have done that. I'll explain everything later, but Elliot, I… I love you'' she says.

''I love you too, baby'' I try my best to concentrate on the road in front of me, but I manage to steal a glance at Kate and she's smiling more brightly than I think she ever had before.

''I have to go, see you later. Please drive safe. Good bye.''

''Good bye, Elliot'' both Kate and I say at the same time.

''Bye. Oh and Ana," he says with a chuckle ''call my brother would ya? He's been worried,'' he says and hangs up before I can answer.

''I'll call him in a bit'' I say to Kate and she nods. ''So this is love huh, real love? Katherine Kavanaugh is in love?'' I ask and she grins.

''I guess she is… I think this is the man for me, Ana. Am I going to marry him? Who knows, maybe … but then we'll be sisters'' she squeals and claps her hands together, I don't answer her, I just nod. No matter what happens, Kate will always be the sister I never had. ''How are his parents?'' Kate asks out of the blue after we've driven a little while longer. ''You are coming to the family dinner tomorrow, right?''

This is the first I've ever heard of a family dinner, I don't remember Christian even mentioning anything. But why would he when his parents hate me. ''I'm not sure if we're going'' I say trying to cover the hurt in my voice. ''And I haven't spent much time with them, so I'm not sure.''

''Oh, but are they like… nice and stuff.'' She asks, and this is seriously not a conversation I want to have, because it is quite hurtful that Christian's parents won't even give me a chance to show them who I really am. They just think I'm after his money, which I don't even want.

''I guess… they're probably sweet and… uh...and… and we didn't really get off on the right foot,'' I say.

''Oh,'' she says, then she's quiet again. ''Wait, wait, wait'' she says after a few minutes. ''Ana I haven't ever met a nicer person than you, even in the beginning of our friendship when I was still a high school bitch, you were still so nice to me. How can they not like you? I don't get that.''

''Thanks Kate, but they're protecting their son, and obviously they think I'm the enemy. I'm just the gold digger that their billionaire boy married randomly.'' I say and I feel a tear slide down my face. ''I really don't wanna talk about this more, can you please drive?'' I ask as I drive into a gas station, and she nods.

* * *

><p><strong>CHRISTIAN<strong>

So far this day has been complete shit. Well every day seems to be shit nowadays. Anastasia is moving in today and Taylor has found a CPO to Ana. When I met him he seemed to be a decent person, and I trust Taylor to find the best there is out there, which he seems to have found with this Sawyer guy.

Gail is in the kitchen now cooking food to be ready for when Ana arrives. Her bed is ready to be slept in, all she's missing is the furniture, which we will go look at tomorrow. God! IKEA, why did she want to go there? I could understand it if I wasn't rich… if we _weren't_ rich, but we are. I just don't get it.

''Mr. Grey'' I hear Andrea over the intercom ''there's a Ms. Katherine Kavanaugh on the phone for you.''

''I'll take it…'' I say and only seconds later my phone rings. I answer it and as I'm about to say...I don't know what I was going to say, I am immediately cut off by Kate.

''Ana is upset,'' she whispers. ''I don't know why, well maybe I do actually. I mentioned the dinner party tomorrow at your parents house…'' shit I have completely forgotten about that. Of course I planned on taking Ana with me, I was going to show my parents that they're mistaken about their assumptions in regards to Ana. ''And I asked'' Kate continues, ''about your parents and how they are, and she got upset, and said that they hadn't gotten off on the right foot. And after that she just zoned out I guess'' she says, and continues to rant on.

''Where are you now?'' I ask, as I walk over to my charger to grab my phone and start to dial Ana's number.

''At a gas station in Tacoma, she's at the toilet.''

''Okay, I'm calling her now,'' I say and hang up. After 3 rings it stops. I find her number again and try one more time. After 2 rings she finally answers. ''Ana?'' I ask, but no one answers. ''Anastasia?''

''Hey, Christian'' she says trying to sound chipper but fails, I can hear it in her voice that she's been crying.

''What's wrong?'' I ask, starting on an e-mail to Andrea telling her to cancel all my appointments today.

''Nothing is wrong… it's just… it's an emotional day, I'll be fine'' she says.

''Do you want me to come and get you? It's no problem,'' I walk out of my office, and see Taylor standing at the elevator. I nod at him and get into the elevator. ''I planned on us going to IKEA tomorrow, but we can do that today if you want. I don't want you to be upset.''

''I said I'm not upset, why do you think that?'' She asks defensively.

''I talked to Kate, Ana,'' I say and she sighs ''I forgot about it, I promise. I have already told my mother that we will be there, it just slipped my mind to ask you. I know things haven't been easy with my parents, but we're going to fix that, okay?''

''Okay,'' she whispers in a shaky breath. ''You don't need to come, I'm nearly in Seattle, it's about an hour. But I would like to go to IKEA today with you, sir.'' She says sweetly, while giggling. And I find myself holding my breath, oh god she will be the death of me. Did she really just call me sir? Jesus. ''Christian are you there?''

''I'm here'' I say hoarsely ''I'll meet you at Kate's new apartment in a little while.'' I hang up on her, and let out a sigh. I look at Taylor in the rearview mirror. ''Flynn, now'' I hiss at him, and he turns the car around.

* * *

><p>''Christian I don't see the problem,'' Flynn says after I've ranted on and on about Ana.<p>

''The problem,'' I say angrily at him ''is these fucking emotions.''

''What emotions?'' He asks, looking down at his notepad ready to start writing down my life story again. I have no idea why he does that, it's not like he's going to use them later in life.

''I don't know… confusion, determination.''

''Determination?'' He asks, as he writes down more than the two works I have just said.

''I guess it's determination to… save her, in a way. I don't know, it's just… it's all so fucking confusing. One minute I'm pissed as hell at her, because of the situation, and in the next minute I need to make her smile because it makes me so fucking happy to see her smile,'' he nods and has a knowing smile on his face, and that just pisses me more off. ''Her friend called me and said that Ana was upset and it didn't feel good at all to hear that.''

''Where did you feel it?''

''In my chest I guess,'' I say looking down at my hands intertwined in my lap.

''In your heart, you mean'' he says looking at me until I look up at him and meet his eyes.

''No, no not at all, it just didn't feel good. You know I don't have a heart and I don't care for people other than my family'' I lie. It's a total lie, I do care for my family but I also care for Anastasia, but that wasn't supposed to happen. ''I don't have feelings for her, how many times do I have to say that? I just don't want to see her hurt, and she's so naïve, she could get hurt very easily… She's my… she's like a charity case, I just want to help her figure her life out.''

Did I just say that? Anastasia Steele… Grey… whatever her name is, is definitely lot of things, I have both negative and positive things to say about her, but she is _not_ a charity case.

She's curious about the world, brave, confident, nosy, and she so damn _naïve_. She sees the good in everyone, even me. She's smart, bright, clever, intelligent, she is really inspiring and I wish I could be more like her, damn I wish the world could be more like her.

She is very generous, she thinks of others needs instead of her own, and she thinks she can save the world somehow. She is helpful and kind, polite and thoughtful. She's like damn mother Theresa, I can hardly find anything negative about her.

Except… the fact that she's sassy, egotistical at times, irritating, it irritates me so much that she always has to spite me and that she can never agree to anything I do for her. She's sharp, and has one hell of a smart mouth. But the good things outweigh the bad things, when I'm around her I don't care about the negative parts. Because, she's beautiful, angelic, delightful, irresistible, kind, pretty, sweet. God! What the fuck is happening to me?

''I can see it on your face Christian'' Flynn says and I focus my attention back onto him. ''You don't have to tell me, before you're ready. But there's more to this than just a 'charity' case,'' he says. ''But you have revealed a lot today, Christian, and that's really good progress. Even though you haven't said much you have clearly discovered new things about yourself.'' He closes his notepad and places it on the table, before looking me directly in the eyes. ''I know you don't want to hear this, but I'm saying it anyway. If anyone in this world can love, it's you Christian. You may not know this yet but it's true. You've been through so much in your life, and frankly I think you need a break. You are stressed and should try to start relaxing, live your life. But… with the experiences you have dealt with, it's only made you stronger, and when you meet the right person, who you might have already met, you will love her fiercely and you will change for her. Wait and see, Christian. I'm sure of it.''


	12. Chapter 12

**I was trying to post this chapter earlier, but every time I tried this was all that came up: ''**503 Service Unavailable. No server is available to handle this request.**'' So I waited, and here it is. **

* * *

><p><strong>ANA<strong>

''We're here!'' Kate squeals as we park our car next to our, I mean, _Kate's,_ new apartment. Both Christian and Elliot are leaning against Christian's Audi, in what seemed to be a serious conversation. And I was reminded of what Elliot told me about his and Christian's relationship. When Kate and I close our car doors, Elliot is by Kate's side in seconds, and Christian is just looking at me.

Neither of us is sure who should make the first move, but the way he's staring at each me makes me blush. I close the distance between us and Christian opens his arms for me to walk into. I know that it's just because Kate and Elliot are here, but I gladly relax into his arms. I lean into the hug and Christian kisses the top of my head.

''Hey,'' he says leaning away slightly so he can see my face. ''You okay?'' He asks, looking in my face for hints that I may not be. I nod, and he smiles. ''Good,'' he look over my shoulder, and quickly looks back at me. ''We should probably get going'' he says. I turn my head and see Kate and Elliot going at it. ''Do you need help backing out or… a condom?'' Christian asks, and Elliot shows him the finger.

''Nope,'' Elliot say grinning down at Kate. ''We're going to christen the place'' Kate is grinning up at Elliot, and they go back to making out. I turn back around towards Christian when I see Elliot's tongue enter Kate's mouth.

''Let's get out of here,'' Christian says, sounding extremely pissed off. He helps me into the car, and gets in behind me and looks out my window one more time, ''drive, Taylor'' he says with a groan. I study the expression on his face, and I only see annoyance and anger.

''Are you mad?'' I ask.

''Yes… no… maybe. I just don't like public affection, I don't get why people do that'' he says with a huff.

''You've never?'' I ask in disbelief ''surely you've kissed your previous girlfriends in public?''

''I haven't'' he says looking out his own window, not looking at me. ''I don't kiss.''

''You've kissed me,'' I whisper, he's kissed me many times. A few kisses on top of my head or pecks on my lips. Then there's the kiss at the bar, and when he made love to me the second time his lips never left mine. Then when we Skyped with his parents, he kissed me like crazy. And all those times, I kissed him back.

''Yes, I have'' he says, still not looking. He doesn't turn around, so I take out my phone to try and amuse myself. I'm not really sure what to do with it though because I can't text Kate and this phone don't have any games. I decide to text my dad and tell him that I arrived in Seattle safely and am now with Christian.

The car stops, and I see where we are, and I am so excited. We're here, we are really here. I am going to see billionaire Christian Grey shop at IKEA. ''Thank you,'' I say and Christian turns around in confusion. ''Thank you'' I say again ''for doing this with me.''

''It's what you want,'' he says with a frown.

''I know, but thank you'' I kiss him on his cheek as Taylor opens my door. ''Hi,'' I say to Taylor and he nods at me. Is he not allowed to address me or something? I'll have to ask Christian about that later. I walk over to Christian, and he holds out his hand for me, and I gladly take it. We walk towards the entrance, and I feel all giddy.

* * *

><p><strong>CHRISTIAN<strong>

What the fuck have I agreed to? I look around at all the shelves in horror at this massed produced nightmare. It's no wonder the quality of the furniture isn't good. I turn around in a circle, taking it all in. The place, the products and the people shopping here was overwhelming. I hear Ana giggle, and I look over at her to see her staring at me and biting her lip, trying to hide a laugh. She looks really sexy right now.

''Are you laughing at me?'' I ask, with a smile tugging at my lips, and she nods. ''You think this is funny?'' I ask, and she nods her head again. She turns her head and look over at Taylor who doesn't fit in here at all, although I guess I don't really either. I walk over to her and wrap my arms around her waist. ''What do you want?''

''I'm not sure, all I need is book shelves, but other than that I'm pretty open minded about what furniture I put in the room,'' she says as we walk around, trying to find out where the heck we're going.

''I have a library'' I say and she looks up at me with raised eyebrows ''I can make space for your books, so you don't need book shelves.''

''You have-?'' She have, ''you didn't tell me!''

''I don't use it, so I didn't really think about it'' I say with a shrug. We continue to walk deeper into the store following where the arrows on the ground tell us to go. There are people everywhere here, of all ages, and so many noises everywhere, it's obnoxious. Ana walks towards the desk area, and I reluctantly follow her.

I look over at Taylor and see that he's just as uncomfortable here as I am. But I think our reasons for discomfort differ. Mine is that I just don't want to be here, while I think Taylor's discomfort stems from security reasons. There are people _everywhere_, and with Ana walking back and forth it's not easy for him to follow us.

I have seen a few cell phones directed towards Ana and I, but I don't think Ana has noticed them and I'm glad, because I'm not sure how she would react to it. I don't know how the world will react to her, we still haven't gone public yet, and Ana doesn't know that we need to go public.

''What do you think of this?'' She ask, pointing to the desk in front of her. She inspects it, like it's a work of art and she pulls out all the drawersNs inspects them.

''You don't want to know,'' I mutter and she narrows her eyes at me. ''Ana'' I sigh ''you know I don't want to be here, you know my opinion on this store, I'm here because you want to be here. Buy whatever makes you happy, you have to live with them'' I say, and I turn to find Taylor. He took a seat on one of the couches, and is looking at us trying to hide his laughter into his fist.

I walk over to him and sit down beside him, my eyes never leaving Ana. I sigh and Taylor chuckles, ''I'll give her another hour and then we're leaving'' I say. Ana starts to walk away, _again,_ to look at other furniture around her, and I get up and walk back over to her. She has some paper in her hands and begins to write something on it.

''I'm taking this,'' she says, walking over to the chairs and starts testing them out. ''Which chair would you pick?'' I run my hand through my hair, and give her a look that makes her giggle. ''Okay, okay I will stop asking you'' she smiles at me, holding her hands up. I take the papers out of her hands and see that she's scribbled down product numbers. ''I think I have enough for now, you wanna eat?'' She asks.

''Here?'' I ask and she nods. ''Ana, you can't be serious. Let's go somewhere else. We can go to the register and pick up these…uh...products, and then we can find an _actual_ restaurant to eat at.''

''Okay, come on'' she says and takes my hand in hers, and I can't help the smile on my face. I see another camera directed towards us, and Ana turns around. ''Did you see that? That person is totally taking pictures of us,'' she says, tensing up at bit.

''I know,'' I stroking a finger down her soft chin ''I'm sorry, I can't help it. For these next few months, you will see quite a few cameras.'' I say with an apologetic smile.

''But why'' she asks, her eyes widening.

''I have no idea, I don't get it and I don't like it, but that's just how it is'' I say, kissing the top of her head. ''Let's get out of here. You have the product numbers right?'' I ask and she nods ''okay, then we can order it online. Come'' I say and take her hand again.

We start following the arrows on the floor again, this time leading us out of this store. They have everything here you could imagine. There is furniture for every part of the house, I'm actually a little impressed. I stop abruptly when a child runs into my legs and clings to them. I look down at the little boy, and then I start looking around to see if I can see who this child belongs to. I don't see any signs of someone who's looking for their child. I hear Ana giggle, and both I and the boy look up at her.

''Hi,'' Ana says sweetly squatting down at the boys level. He smiles warily at her, and Ana beams her amazing smile back at him. ''Have you lost your parents?'' She asks, and the boy nods. ''We're going to help you find them again, okay?'' Ana says looking up at me and I nod at her. I want to get out of here, but I would never leave a child behind, I would never want a child to feel anything like what I went through. ''I'm Ana.''

''I'm Brian,'' he says sucking his thumb.

''That's a beautiful name,'' Ana says, and the little boy who looks like he's maybe around 4, smiles toothily at Ana. ''What is your mommy and daddy's name?'' Ana ask, and the boy seems to think for a little while.

''Susan,'' he says ''my daddy is gone'' he whispers, and Ana looks sadly at him, but she quickly has her smile back. He points behind him, but doesn't say anything.

''Is your mommy that way?'' She asks, and he nods. She looks up at me with a sweet smile then she looks back at the boy, ''this is Christian.'' I smile down at him, but I'm not really sure what to do. ''Can you carry him?'' Ana asks, and my eyes widen. ''Please, Christian. Look at him, he's 4 and clearly lost, let's help him'' the look Ana has on her face does something to me, and I just can't say no.

Ana stands up again, and I lean down lifting the little boy up. ''Hi'' I whisper at him, and he hides his face in my neck. Ana smiles at me and mouths 'thank you.' We start walking around and Ana asks him questions about what his mother looks like, and where he saw her last. Most of his answers are shrugs, but Ana and I have a general idea of what his mother looks like.

Taylor is walking right behind her, and I know that he's also looking for the boy's mother. ''Excuse me Ma'am'' Taylor says and Ana looks back at him with an annoyed look ''maybe we should take him to the information desk. The boy's mom might be waiting for him there.'' Ana looks around one last time before nodding.

We walk for a little while, then we see a woman crying hysterical into her hands, and an employee trying to calm her down. ''Mommy!'' The boy shouts, and her head whips up. ''Mommy,'' he squeals again. Ana takes the boy from my arms, and walks over to the woman; and she hugs her son in a tight grip. I can't help but think that no one ever did that for me, my mom would never have done that for me when she was alive.

''Brian'' she cries, and he holds onto his mother tightly, she looks up at Ana then at me. ''Thank you,'' she says to both of us. She looks back at her son ''I thought I had lost you too'' she cries. Brian looks around then points at something.

''Toys,'' he says ''I wanna play'' he says trying to get out of her lap.

''No baby,'' she whispers, drying her tears. Brian doesn't listen to her, and jumps off her lap. She starts to stand up, but Ana holds up her hand, and tells her she'll look after him. I look over at Ana as she saunters after the boy and watches as he starts to pick up the toys. The woman tries to pull herself together, but seems to struggle. I sit down beside her and hand her my handkerchief. ''Thank you,'' she whispers. ''You're Christian Grey, right?'' she asks after a little while.

''Yeah,'' I answer warily as I look at Ana and Brian throwing a ball back and forth. ''What happened to your husband, if you don't mind me asking,'' I ask, her and she takes in a deep breath.

''He… h-he'' she stammers ''died in a car crash,'' she says not meeting my eyes. ''Brian is all I have left,'' she says sadly. ''I don't know what to tell Brian, it happened pretty recently and he's always asking me when his daddy will be home.'' She looks back up at me, with teary eyes. ''It's hard, but we'll manage.'' She looks over at her son with a weak smile.

''I'm sorry for your loss,'' I say and she nods. I want to say something more but I don't know what I should or shouldn't say.

''Your girlfriend seems great.''

''Wife,'' I correct her, I didn't mean to say it, it just slipped out. I stand up and walk over towards Ana, she looks at me and smiles then she goes back to playing with the boy. ''Hi,'' I whisper to her.

''Brian, why don't you go and show your mommy the toy'' Ana asks, and he walks away happily. She turns towards me, and rests her arms on top of my shoulders, and my hands go directly to her waist. ''Thank you,'' she says.

''I want to do something for them,'' I say and Ana nods with a smile. ''She lost her husband in a car accident and she's all alone with her son.''

''No,'' Ana gasps. ''We have to do something'' I nod and she smiles at me. ''You're a sweet man, Mr. Grey'' she says and pecks my lips quickly.

''That's a first,'' I say with a chuckle. ''Let's go talk with Susan and see what she needs,'' Ana takes my hand, and we walk over to them.

* * *

><p><strong>ANA<strong>

''I can't believe you did all that for them, that was amazing'' I say sipping the glass of wine that Christian ordered. After we parted ways with Susan and Brian, we found a restaurant to eat at. We stayed a little while and talked with them, and Susan and I actually exchanged numbers. I think I may just have made my first friend in Seattle.

''It was nothing,'' Christian says with a shrug, but I know he's lying. Trying to be a hard ass male and all that, but I know that Christian has a warm and fuzzy heart, and it made me so happy when he told me he wanted to help them.

''It was 20 thousand dollars, Christian! That wasn't nothing, you helped that woman out while she's faced with a difficult time in her life,'' I say with a smile full of gratitude.

''We helped,'' He correct me, and I like that he does that. It was Christian's money, but I like that Christian thinks of this as something we did together, for someone else. ''You were great with the little boy,'' he tells me.

''I love kids, especially at that age, they're the cutest…'' I admit, and smile down at my food. I have always wanted kids, and I can't wait until the day that I have children, but I'm not there yet. Plus I need to be in a stable relationship, with the man of my dreams. ''Ehm… the dinner tomorrow, when is that?''

''At 6, we don't have to go if you don't want to. I understand if you don't want to, especially after the way my parents have been towards you.'' He says.

''No we have to, or they'll never like me. What do I need to know about your family?'' I ask and he huffs.

''Well my mother is a pediatrician, my dad is a lawyer, nothing much to tell there. My sister on the other hand…'' he says looking exasperated. ''She's something else'' he says ''she will be a bit much, but you'll get use to her. She will probably be more forceful towards you than she'll be with Kate, but I think you will like each other.''

''Why me more than Kate?'' I ask with a frown.

''Well I'm her favorite brother,'' he says with a cocky grin, but when he sees that I'm not amused he gets serious again. ''I've never brought a girl home before.'' What? Never brought a girl home before? Didn't his girlfriends get to meet his parents, is this why they are so protective? ''I can see the wheels spinning, Ana'' he says pointing at my head ''I've never had a girlfriend, _or _boyfriend like my mother seemed to think. I've never dated, never kissed, never cuddled, held hands, or went shopping with a girl that wasn't my sister or my mother. You're the first,'' he says taking a sip of his wine.

''You never used to kiss?'' I ask and he shakes his head, ''or just laid in a bed with a girl, or held hands?'' He shakes his head again. ''But you've had sex,'' I say. It was meant more as a question but came out as a statement. He nods his head, smirking at me. ''But… but it's, it's so personal'' I say trying to figure him out. ''It's so intimate, and you've only had sex? You've made love to people without kissing them?'' I ask in disbelief.

''No,'' he says looking into my eyes. ''I never made love… I fuck, Anastasia. I don't want sex to be something intimate shared between lovers, you don't have to be in love to be sexually attracted to someone'' he says still looking into my eyes. He asks for the check as a waitress walks by our table, and he puts his suit jacket back on, and waits for me to walk in front of him.

''_I never made love… I fuck''_ what does he mean by that? How can you not kiss someone when you do something else that's even more intimate with them? He kissed me. In fact, he has kissed me so many times, and he's really good at it. No one has ever kissed me like he does. And I like it, I like it a lot, and wish he would never stop.


	13. Chapter 13

**CHRISTIAN**

As I lay in bed, I toss and turn for about an hour. No matter how hard I try, I just can't fall asleep, the thought of Ana sleeping in the submissive bedroom, bothers me in a way, and in another way turns me on. I should've just picked a random guestroom for her, because she's not my submissive, and she never will be. If Ana finds out about the BDSM aspect of my life, even if she finds out that she's sleeping in the same bedroom as all my other subs have, I can't imagine how she will react.

Actually, I know how she would react. Ana would leave me. Then go into hiding until we can finalize the divorce, but I don't want that. I want the divorce, but I don't want Ana to be repulsed by me, or leave me. I enjoy her company, both in and out of bed. She's the first female I've ever wanted to spend time with outside the bedroom…playroom. I wouldn't mind taking Ana in there, but she would never agree to it, at least not now. And now that I know how inexperienced she is, I don't want to take her in there.

I get out of bed, and walk into the kitchen to make myself a cup of coffee. I take the coffee with me and head to my home office. I've always found my office at home relaxing. It's _my _office and other than Taylor and my father, no one has been in here. At Grey Enterprises Holdings, I've had meetings and shit like that in my office, and most of the meetings I have are rather unpleasant. It is unpleasant for them, but I do feel bad when I see the realization on their faces that they finally understand how deep under they're going to be, if they don't sell.

Ultimately, they walk out of my office with a good deal, but the family businesses are the ones that have problems. The ones that were started way, way back, those are the people who have it the hardest when they sell to me. They almost never leave my office happy, even though they have a good deal, but they are the ones who "failed the family".

I sit down in my office chair, and let out a breath to try and relax. I take out my keys from my pocket and open my second drawer, and my eyes land on exactly what I _didn't_ want to find. I pick up the document, and quickly glance at it.

* * *

><p><em>CONTRACT BETWEEN<br>Mr. Christian Grey, of 301 Escala, Seattle, WA 98889 (''The dominant'') _

_Miss Anastasia Steele, of 1114 SW Green Street, Apartment 7, Heaven Heights, Vancouver, WA 98888 (''The submissive'')_

* * *

><p>God I can't read this, even though I know exactly what it says by heart. Why did I draft a contract before knowing the circumstances we would end up in? I close the file, and stand up without my coffee and walk towards the playroom. As I pass Ana's room, I stop and listen to see if there are any sounds coming from her room. Snoring, laughing, maybe crying, but there's nothing. I continue on my journey until I reach the door to my playroom. I take the key out of my pocket and open the door. I quickly enter and quietly close the door behind me and lock it.<p>

I walk into the room and the smell of citrus hits me as I take a deep breath in. I lay the document down on the bed and start to open the drawers. I find the new items I bought for Ana when I still thought she could be my submissive, as well as some of the old items. If Ana saw this, would she be repulsed? Or would she be turned on? I take one of the whips into my hand and flick it, hearing the hissing sound it makes as it cuts through the air.

I sit down on the bed, feeling the sheets between my fingers and enjoying the smell of citrus and leather, my favorite smells. It brings back so many good memories, but I can't picture the subs anymore. Now every time I try to think about it, all I see is the one face that's been haunting me since meeting her, Ana. 6 months, it will be 6 months until I can get a new submissive. No way I could have one whilst married to Ana, nor do I want one. Although I need to find my release in another way, now that Ana's not on board with having casual sex. I guess my hand will do until I find something else to get me off.

I need to get out of here before I start to imagine me and Ana tangled together in these sheets. The smell already has me spotting a hard on, and I don't need the visions of me and Ana together or I will never be able to face her. These next months will be sheer torture for me. And in the end of it all, I'm losing her. I know I won't ever find anyone that makes me feel what Ana has made me feel, and it's only been a couple of weeks.

_What will happen after 6 months? God, what's happening to me?_

* * *

><p><strong>ANA<strong>

I've been lying in bed for an hour now, not sure what to do. What if no one else is up? It doesn't really feel right walking around here alone when everyone else is sleeping. From the tour we had yesterday, I know where most things are, but it still feels weird to walk around this new place alone. Although I know that when I leave the room and I walk to the right, I'll get to the kitchen and the living room, and then to the left is Christian's room and playroom. I didn't expect him to have a playroom, but apparently he has an x-box and play stations, along with a billiard table and more stuff that I'm not sure what they are.

I met Mrs. Jones who is Christian's housekeeper. She seemed really nice and I think we'll get along well. Sawyer on the other hand, I'll need to work on. I really don't want a relationship like what Taylor and Christian have together. I want to be at least on first name basis, and I want to be friends, someone I can talk to and trust. But yesterday he was very formal, always calling me Ma'am or Mrs. Grey.

I sit up in bed, and look around the room. It feels so empty, beside the bed and my bag on the floor, there's nothing in here. In the bathroom there's a bathtub, which I absolutely love. I always wanted a bathtub as a child, but I never got one. I get out of the bed and walk towards the walk in closet, which I know I'll never be able to fill, but it is really pretty.

I open the door and when I turn on the light inside, I'm stunned. It's full of clothes, beautiful dresses in different shapes and colors, shoes lined up underneath. I open the drawers and see lots of underwear, all in my size. How did he know my size? Every time he asked Taylor to get me clothes, the clothes have somehow always fit, and now they know my bra size. _Jesus._ How embarrassing.

Well it looks like I at least have clothes for the dinner tonight. I barely slept last night, because I just sat awake thinking about it. But this meeting I'll have Kate there as support and of course Elliot, plus Christian was sure that his sister would like me. So that's 2 out of 4. I need to do something though, to show them that I'm not after his money. So the first thing I'm doing today is going out to buy a nice dress to wear. I will not be wearing all these clothes that Christian bought for me. I put on a pair of jeans, and a tank top and find my way into the kitchen.

''Good morning'' I hear from behind me, when I exit my room. I turn around and see Christian standing there yawning, only in his pajama bottom. I lift my eyes quickly up to meet his eyes; hopefully he didn't see me gawking. His hair is a mess, and like everything else, it suits him.

''Good morning,'' I say with a smile, and he smiles back at me. ''Sleep well?'' We start to walk together towards the kitchen.

''Yeah, I slept okay I guess, you?''

''Like a baby,'' I say cheerfully and he chuckles. I'm not normally this cheerful in the mornings, but I've been up for a while so I'm no longer grumpy. ''I wanted to talk to you about something,'' I say as we sit down at the kitchen isle. Mrs. Jones is standing by the stoves making something that smell delicious.

''Okay,'' he says taking a sip off his coffee. ''You need help with something?''

''No… well maybe, if you're offering.'' I say and he narrows his eyes at me skeptically. ''I need to buy a dress for dinner later today, and I don't know where to look for one.''

''Have you looked in your closet?'' He asks, taking another sip of his coffee. ''There was supposed to be clothes in there for you.''

''I did see them, that was very nice of you. I really appreciate them, but I can't wear them'' I say dipping my tea bag in the cup in front of me.

''Why?'' He asks with a frown.

''I want to… I mean, I don't need your parents seeing me in something like that,'' his frowns even more at that. ''It's obvious that a girl like me couldn't have bought something like that, and that'll just prove your parents point about the whole gold digging thing.''

''Ana,'' he sighs ''I am your husband, and husbands buy stuff for their wives. When my parents met, mom wasn't from a wealthy family. She had lots of student loans from med school. My dad helped her pay them off, over the years. And he spent a lot of money buying pretty things for her,'' he says.

''That's different, he did it out of love. We're just pretending. That was real, this isn't.''

''They don't know that,'' he pick up his plate that Mrs. Jones set in front of him and walks out of the kitchen. ''Use the clothes, Ana'' he shouts after he's left the room. I sigh and sit back in my chair sipping my tea.

''What would you like to eat?'' Mrs. Jones asks turning around to look at me.

''Whatever Christian had is fine,'' I mutter.

''Yes, Ma'am.''

''Call me Ana, please'' I say sweetly giving her a smile. ''Can I help you?'' I ask standing and walking beside her. ''It smells really good.''

''Thank you, Ana, but you sit, and I'll bring it to you as soon as I've finished it.'' She says continuing what she was doing.

''I really would like to help, maybe you can teach me something. Please'' I say and she says yes with a smile. She asks me to get stuff from the fridge, and then explains everything she's doing to me.

Every time she asks me to try, I fail miserably, and she tries to hold in her laugh. She's a really nice lady, I would say she's in her late thirties or early forties, but not much older than that, and she looks great. ''Here you go,'' she says handing over the finished plate and I take it and sit back down on the isle.

''Thank you,'' I say. She makes a plate for herself, and starts to leave the room. ''Wait, sit with me'' I say looking over at one of the chairs.

''Ana, I couldn't…''

''Please, I want company while I eat breakfast.'' She smiles sweetly and nods her head. ''What's your name?'' I ask.

''Gail,'' she answers ''but you can call me Mrs. Jones, I don't mind.''

''Nonsense, I'll call you Gail. This was really fun, we should do it again,'' she answers with a smile and a nod. We eat our food in silence, I looked up at her a few times, and she looks uncomfortable, as if she didn't know if what she was doing was okay.

* * *

><p>When we're done eating she picks up our plates and starts cleaning. ''How long have you worked for Christian?'' I ask.<p>

''Ahem,'' we both turn around to look at Christian. He's leaning against the door frame, but he doesn't have an angry look on him. He looks amused, and a little smile is pulling at the corners of his mouth. ''Are you two done, talking about me?'' he asks, taking his plate over to the sink. ''We apparently have a store to go to.'' He says with an apologetic smile at me.

I look around and see that Gail has left the kitchen. ''It's okay, we're getting to know each other, right?'' I ask, and he nods ''there are bound to be arguments over the next 6 months.'' I walk over to him, and pat him on his arm, ''let's be friends at least. If you have a problem with something or anything you need to tell me. We'll get through these months together.''

''Okay,'' he says ''I'm gonna take a shower. We'll leave in about an hour, is that good?'' I nod, and he smiles. ''We have 6 hours until the dinner, so we have plenty of time.'' He starts to walk out of the room, but turn around to say ''don't stress about it.''


	14. Chapter 14

**ANA**

''Breathe Ana, you look amazing,'' Christian says while rubbing my knuckles with his thumb. We're only a few minutes from Christian's parents' house, and I am really nervous.

We went shopping for a dress this afternoon, which went really well. He sat there and looked at all the dresses I tried on, and gave me his honest opinion, although we did fight over who would pay for the dress, but eventually I won and I bought it for myself.

''Okay,'' I nod at Christian letting out a large sigh. ''It's not too much?'' I ask looking down at the dress I chose. I'm wearing a mid-thigh burgundy colored dress, with a black belt around my waist. I want to impress them, but not too much. I don't like that they think of me as a gold digger, when I'm anything but that.

''No, you look beautiful,'' he says with a warm smile. ''You look good in that color,'' he says turning his head to look out the window, but not before I see a smirk on his face. Why is he smirking? Doesn't he like it? Does he think that I will make a fool out of myself? That stupid smirk, just made me more nervous. ''We're here,'' Christian announces, and I realize that the car's not moving anymore.

I lean over Christian to look out the window. I look up at a big house that Christian grew up in. I look back at Christian when I feel him squeeze my waist, we're face to face and he asks me if I'm ready. With a smile I nod, and Christian get's out of the car first, then holds out his hand for me to take. We walk hand in hand up the steps to the door, and I feel sick. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all. The last time they saw me, their son had his tongue down my throat, in order to prove that he's straight.

''It's okay,'' he says and reaches for the doorknob, when the door slams open and a girl around my age squeals.

''Oh my god, oh my god'' she says and throws her arms around Christian in a hug. ''Is this her?'' she 'whispers' in his ear, clearly loud enough for me to hear, and Christian answers her with a nod. ''Oh my god, Ana so good to meet you'' she says and I exchange my hand to her, but she ignores it and goes in for a hug. I look over at Christian with wide eyes, and he tries to hold back laughter.

''Mia, let her breathe'' Christian says and she let's go of me. She has a huge smile on her face and looks really excited. ''Shall we?'' Christian asks, motioning us inside. We all walk in and I'm even more stunned at how beautiful it looks inside. It doesn't look like I imagined it would at all. It is huge of course, but it's very homey and warm, nothing like Christian's place. ''You okay?''

''Yes,'' I say still looking around, ''is that you?'' I ask as I walk over to the pictures on the wall. There are so many of Mia as a little girl, a few of all 3 children together, many of Elliot, but not that many with only Christian in them. And in most of the pictures he doesn't smile the way I always see him when he smiles. My heart aches for him, when I see how unhappy he seems. ''How old were you there?'' I ask and point to a pictures where he's shirtless in the garden, chasing after Mia.

''15,'' he answers. All the pictures from that age and up over; his smile vanishes more and more until it is almost non-existent. ''Come,'' he says and leads me into the dining room. ''Mother,'' he says and Grace turns around, and smiles at Christian. To my surprise she doesn't give me a scolding look. Christian walks over to his mother and kisses her on her cheek, ''you remember Anastasia,'' he motions over to me.

''Of course I do,'' she says. Her voice is still formal, but a lot warmer than it's ever been before. ''How're you doing?''

''I'm good, thanks for asking'' I smile at her ''and you?'' She seems surprised by my answer, but returns my smile.

''I'm doing well, excuse me'' she says and walks in to what I'm guessing is the kitchen. Christian wraps his arms around my waist and leads me over to the dining table, and pulls out the chair for me.

''Thank you,'' I say as I sit down. ''That went really well,'' I say and turn my head towards Christian.

''It did, she's probably coming around.'' He says with a frown.

* * *

><p><strong>CHRISTIAN<strong>

So far things have gone extremely well, Ana seems calmer now. Elliot and Kate arrived shortly after we did, and all throughout dinner there was small talk. Both my parents included Ana in the different subjects that were going around the table. Both Ana and Kate were asked a lot of questions about their education and their friendship. I think the one comment that Kate made was what ultimately won my mom over.

''_Ana is like a sister for me; I don't know what I would've done without her. I changed for the better when I met her, and your son is really lucky to be married to such an amazing person.'' _

Before now, I didn't realize how much my mom's approval meant for me. When Ana's father approved of me, I had this feeling, and I hope Ana feels the same way right now. My father has been on his best behavior, but I think the whole prenup thing is still bothering him. I know what kind of person Ana is, and of course when we get the divorce I won't leave her on her own. I will have someone tailing after her, making sure that everything is fine with her. And she will get enough money to live the happy life that she deserves.

All I want is for her to be happy.

I am shocked by my own words. But I know that if after our divorce is finalized, she ended up on the streets, I would be… I don't know what I would be, but I loathe the thought of it. ''Christian, are you coming?'' Ana's voice breaks me out of my thoughts.

''Huh?'' I ask, when I see that everyone, but Ana, has left the dining room.

''We're having coffee in the living room,'' she says and waits for me to join her. I walk up beside her and out of instinct, I wrap my arm around her waist.

''You're doing really well,'' I whisper into her ear, and I can see the smile creeping onto her face.

''Yea, I feel like maybe I have them now,'' she giggles ''I like them, they're very nice.'' We enter the living room, and everyone is looking at us, clearly waiting for something. I just kiss the side of Ana's head and we sit down on the couch. Mom's eyes linger on us, as the rest of the people start eating the dessert. I look up at her, and she smiles softly at me. She motions her head a bit towards the door. I pat Ana on her thigh, before getting up and leaving the room. Only seconds later, my mom joins me.

''Are you happy?'' She asks, ''all I need to know is if my baby boy is happy'' she says teary eyed.

''Yes mom, Ana makes me happy'' I whisper, afraid of how true these words actually are.

''You seem different now, more… alive. It has killed me seeing you unhappy all this years Christian, and now you're finally smiling.'' She stands on her tiptoes and traces my mouth with her finger, ''you have the most lovely smile, Christian'' she says as a tear rolls down her cheek.

''Thank you, mom, I'm glad you're finally seeing how amazing she is'' I whisper. I lean in to hug her, and I can see the surprised expression on her face. I wrap my arms around her, and she lets her arms hang loose, so she doesn't touch me anywhere she knows I don't like.

''You're happy, she makes you happy, that means she makes me happy'' she says kissing my cheek as she walks past me and into the living room again.

* * *

><p><strong>ANA<strong>

Now it feels stupid thinking of how scared I was. Honestly, I was seconds away from asking Taylor to turn the car around. After Grace returned from wherever she and Christian went off to, she asked to speak with me for a second. I followed after her into the hall, and a little part of me was afraid that she would ask me to leave. But instead she enfolded me into a big hug, and whispers ''thank you'' over and over again to me.

She apologized for the way she behaved when she first met me, and explained why she acted that way. I can understand why she acted the way she did, she's just worried about her son, and they were right; Christian is walking into this 'marriage' with over 11 billion dollars, and I have nearly nothing.

I told her that it was okay, and I also talked about my hopes in getting a job soon and that I have a few interviews coming up. She seemed pleased by that, and gave me another hug telling me good luck. I had no idea how long we stood there talking before both Christian and Carrick came looking for us.

All in all, this has been a really good day. Better than I thought it would be, I was ready to just give up on the Grey's after today, if I wasn't able to win them over. But I'm glad that I did, they are great people. Mia was really sweet and friendly, but she was all over Christian and I's story. All Christian answered with was that it was our private story, and she found that really romantic.

I felt relived every time the attention was on Kate and Elliot; it was nerve-wrecking to sit there waiting for their questions. Elliot has decided to join Kate and her family's vacation, and the beam of Kate's face as he said it was giant. She really loves him, and I'm glad for her. Kate and Elliot left earlier than we did and we all knew why. The entire dinner, Elliot and Kate hadn't been able to keep their hands off each other, so they were clearly impatient to get alone. I can't wait until I have those kinds of feeling and interactions with the man I love, when I eventually meet him.

I lay back in my bed with a sigh and then I smile when I hear a knock on the door. I put on my robe and answer the door, and Christian is standing there in only his pajama bottoms again. I can't help but let my eyes drift downwards to his chest. ''Couldn't sleep?'' I ask, as I look up at him and he has an unreadable expression on his face.

''Haven't tried yet,'' he says shifting his weight on his left feet, standing with his hip into the doorway. ''I'm leaving early tomorrow,'' he says looking down at the floor. ''Sawyer is here, and ready to take you where ever you wish to go.'' He looks someplace behind me, but never meeting my eyes, why won't he look at me? ''You can always call me, if I'm not answering my phone my personal assistant can find me if it's important…'' He shifts his stare to my breast before quickly looking away again. ''Remember your uh… appointment tomorrow, Sawyer will take you. Ehm… uhm… good night'' he says before walking away.

''Good night'' I call after him, but he doesn't turn around. I walk into my bathroom and its then that I first notice that my robe is wide open at the top and most of my bra is sticking out and my nipples are visible. I blush from embarrassment, as I walk back to my bed. I lie down and fall asleep almost before my head met my pillow.


	15. Chapter 15

**ANA**

8, that's the number of how many disagreements Sawyer and I have had so far today. I think I've told him a hundred times, to call me Ana and not Mrs. Grey or Ma'am. And then he tried to take another elevator down to the parking garage, since the security guys apparently have their own elevator, so after we argued for 10 minutes, we both just went down in the service elevator. He also tried to make me sit in the back of the car when I wanted to sit in the front, in order to get get to know him a little bit.

Getting Sawyer to warm up, and be on a friendlier note with me will definitely be hard, but I'm not giving up. It went well with Gail. I don't see Taylor that often and I never have a chance to have a conversation with him, so he and I haven't really had a chance to be friends. I have seen a few other security guys walking around here and there in the apartment, but none of them have looked at me or anything, so I'm not going to try with them. But if I understood Christian correctly, I will see Sawyer more than anyone else. So I need us to at least be friendly.

This morning I felt more comfortable knowing that Gail was waiting on me with breakfast, and that I had someone to talk to. I knew Christian was probably already at work, so having Gail there really helped. Then when we were cleaning up after breakfast, Sawyer alerted me about my appointment, and now we're in the car on the way to the psychiatrist who I'm meeting with.

I think talking with someone might actually help, because right now I have no one to talk to. I can't talk to Kate, because she thinks that this is real, that we are trying for real to be married, whilst the truth is, we're trying to get through 6 months together without anyone noticing the fakeness of the marriage. I think Gail knows about the marriage being a mistake, but she's hired by Christian, and I don't feel comfortable talking with her about it. So I'm going to use this psychiatrist when this situation gets to be too much and I need someone to talk to.

''So,'' I say turning towards Sawyer, he grips the wheel and looks uncomfortable. ''Do you know where we are going?'' I ask, and the grip he had on the wheel loosens.

''Yes… Ana'' he says. ''I'll call you by your first name if Mr. Grey doesn't mind.''

''Oh he does,'' I say and his right grip is back. ''Would you relax? How are you supposed to protect me if we are strangers and uncomfortable with each other?'' I ask, and he only looks forward at the road. ''I will ask Christian for a new security… man, if you don't cooperate with me here. All I want is for us to be friends, I need a friend.'' I whine and he looks over at me with a sympathetic look, before looking at the road again.

''I can be that, Ana'' he says and I see a little smile at the corner of his mouth. I sit back in my seat with a smile on my face, mission accomplished.

The car slows down, and I see a huge glass building in front of us. ''Do you know where the shrink is? I forgot to ask Christian'' I ask, and he nods. He parks the car and then quickly leaves the car in order to open my door before I had a chance to open it myself. We walk over to the entrance and Sawyer enters a code for the to open the door. What's with all the secretiveness?

* * *

><p>''Mrs. Grey, nice to meet you'' a woman in her thirties says to me. When Sawyer and I arrived at the right floor I was led right in here and immediately greeted by this lady. ''I'm Dr. Martin, please take a seat'' she says motioning over to a little cozy sitting area in the corner of her office.<p>

''Just Ana'' I say as I take a seat in one of the chairs. ''Is it okay if I call you by your first name?'' I ask, sitting nervously on my hands, so she doesn't see me fidgeting.

''Of course, Ana, whatever makes you comfortable. I'm Rose, so you can call me that. Some people call me only Martin, or Doctor, sometimes Doc and a few are more comfortable with just saying 'you' so it's up to you whatever you want to call me'' she says with a smile, and I already like her. She picks up the notebook that's lying on the table in front of her, and looks up at me with a warm smile. ''I know about your situation, so that's out of the way but I would like to know a bit more about you, who is Ana.''

''Ehm… I'm… me'' I say while nervously rubbing my hands in front of me. ''I'm nothing special, I'm just me'' I say looking down in my lap.

''I find that hard to believe'' she says and cocks her head a little to the side. ''What do you like? What makes you happy?''

''Books, I love reading and I do spend a lot of time reading'' she smiles and looks down at her notebook in order to write down what I just said. ''I love spending time with my friends, not really doing anything but just relaxing together, and I love spending time with my dad. He's my hero'' I say with a big smile on my face.

''That all sounds nice,'' she says writing down. ''Your dad is your hero, you say'' she asks looking up at me ''can you elaborate on that a bit more? What makes him your hero, what has he done to deserve that title?''

''I don't want to talk about it… yet'' I say the words rushing out of my mouth, and not meeting her eyes.

''That's okay, we'll get back to that later.'' She smiles and writes down more. ''Would you say you and your dad is close?''

''Not as close as I wish we were, he lives in Montesano and I've been gone for 4 years in college, and now I'm here. But I'll visit him when I have the time'' I say.

''Your mother?''

''My mother and I, aren't close. Somewhere along the line we just lost each other, and we never tried getting together again… I don't know what to say'' I breath out, and I feel tears start to form in my eyes. She pushes over a box with Kleenex and I take one. ''My biological dad died the day after I was born, and she married my stepdad, my dad, 2 years later. She… was never happy, and she started cheating on him, I caught her a few times, and my dad caught her a few times. When they got a divorce, we moved. My mom was so mad at dad and just wanted away from him. She got married again and…''

''Take your time'' she says when I stop. ''You're doing great'' she smiles. ''So… your mother remarried again?''

''Yeah, I didn't react to the problems then, but now I do. It was only a few months after my parents' divorce'' I say drying a tear that rolled down my face. ''Ultimately, It didn't go well in Texas, and I moved back in with my dad.''

''Is that why he became your hero? Did he save you from something?'' I nod my head, and she narrows her eyes at me. ''Did your mom's husband number 3 do something inappropriate with you?'' I feel a new wave of tears starting to form in my eyes, and I hide my head in my hands. ''You don't want to talk about it, yet?'' She asks and I shake my head. I haven't told anyone what happened in Texas, not even my dad who came and got me out of there. And it's not easy to open up to a person you've only met 30 minutes ago, no matter if you know you can trust her or not. ''We'll get back to it when you're ready… So what are your plans for the next 6 months?''

''I am going to get a job,'' I say drying the last drops of my tears. ''And that's actually all I have planned. Before the marriage happened, I knew that was what I was going to do when I got to Seattle, but I guess some things will change and happen after awhile.''

''Okay, I just want us for today to forget about the marriage, today or at least now it doesn't exist. I'm talking to Anastasia Steele, can we do that?'' She asks, and I nod. ''Great, so… Do you want to find love?'' I nod, biting down on my lip while blushing. ''What do you look for in a man?''

I think about that for a moment, but every time I think of the "ideal" man, the person is always faceless except coppery hair and piercing grey eyes. ''I'm not searching for the looks, I'm looking for someone that makes me laugh, that wants to spend time with me and that I want to spend time with… That's all I care about.''

''Have there ever had a boyfriend in your life?'' She asks, and I shake my head. There have been a few boys that I've thought I had a crush on, but no one has ever taken a liking to me before. ''Haven't you been interested before, or…?'' I shake my head again. ''Okay,'' she says. ''Tell me more about the job you want.''

We stayed and talked for another half hour, before Sawyer came in and told us the time was up. We mostly just small talked. We talked about the editor job I want and about what I like to do when I'm with friends or when I'm with my dad. And never once, did she or I mention Christian. It felt good; to pretend for an hour that everything was back to normal. But it isn't, and it never will be.

* * *

><p>''Hey Gail,'' I say as I walk into the kitchen, she turns around and gives me a huge smile. ''What are you making? It smells wonderful.''<p>

''Just a few different dishes that I will freeze, so that Christian has something to eat when I'm not around,'' she says, going back to cutting up vegetables.

''Where do you live?'' I ask, because I feel like she's always here, ready for either me or Christian to ask for something.

''I live here week days, and on weekends I go to my apartment. Christian doesn't want me here on weekends, which is fine by me'' she says.

''Why doesn't he want you here?'' I whisper, walking over to the vegetables she's cut, and I steal one of the carrot bites. When she sees that I'm chewing, she swats me away with her hand. ''Why?'' I ask her again, after she doesn't answer the first time.

''Oh,'' she says likes she's reminded of something, ''that's not really my place to tell.'' I leave the kitchen to look for the library, and to let Gail be alone so she can concentrate on what she's making.

When Christian showed me around, I think he went left from the kitchen. Past my bedroom and into a corridor on the right, then there would be a door that led to the library. With the size of this apartment it really should be marked down, arrows on the ground leading towards different destination, or maybe a sign or two. I could definitely use those. The only route here I really know is from my room, to the kitchen and living room area.

I walk into the left corridor, and try to open the closest door to my right, but when I try to turn the knob, the door is locked. I try shaking it again, but it doesn't work. ''Can I help you, Ana?'' I freeze and turn around and see Sawyer standing at the entrance of the corridor.

''Jesus, you scared me'' I say and he gets a little smirk on his face, like he's pleased by it ''I'm looking for the library'' I say turning to look back at the door again. What's in there? This isn't the first time I've walked into the wrong room, but this is the first time I've come across a locked door. Most of the rooms are just guest rooms.

''This way'' he says motioning from the way we came in, ''you took the wrong turn'' he says. He walks in front of me, and turns around once to look at the door, before turning his attention back in front of him. Does everyone except me know what's in there? Is Christian doing something illegal? He doesn't strike me as that sort of guy. He helps third world countries and donates a lot of money each year to different organizations, I don't think such an honorable guy would do anything illegal. ''Here you go'' he says and opens the door for me.

''Thank you'' I smile at him, and he leaves me alone with all the books. I walk in and see that my books are lying in a box, next to one of the shelves. Christian told me to do with them as I pleased, and that I could rearrange the shelves, but I couldn't throw anything away. As if I would through away a book. For now my books can just lie there, I really want them in my room, close to me.

I turn my attention away from my books, and look at the shelves here, full of books. It's then that I first notice that all the books are first editions, like the books he sent me as an apology. That seems like a lifetime ago.

I take one of the books out of the shelf, and sit down in the comfy chair, by the window, and lose myself in the book.

I have no idea how long I've been sitting there, but I jump out of the chair when there's a loud knock on the door. Sawyer opens the door, and looks in ''Ana, dinners ready,'' he says and holds the door open for me. I mark the page in the book, with one of my bookmarks, and put it down on the chair.

''Is Christian back?'' I ask as we walk towards the kitchen. On the way over, we walk past the corridor with the locked door, and I can't help but look at the door. I wonder what's in there?

''No, he is still at work'' Sawyer says, and I look at my phone to see if I have any missed calls or texts, but there are none. ''He won't be joining you today'' he says and walks back into the security room.

I walk into the kitchen, and Gail has set out a plate of chicken and something else on the table for me. I sit down, and she also sits down this time, without me having to ask her. I sit and push my food around on the plate, and Gail worriedly looks over at me a few times.

* * *

><p>''Wasn't it any good?'' She asks, as she clears our plates. Mine was barely touched.<p>

''No, it was really good'' I say, the few bites I had tasted amazing ''I just wasn't that hungry'' I say and she nods.

I walk back into the library, and sit down again with the book. I actually feel a bit hurt, I remember Christian telling me how he would eat with me when he was home, but he could've called or something. Is that too much to ask for?

It's after 8pm when Christian walks into the library, in a suit with his briefcase in hand. ''Hi,'' he says setting the case down, and walking over to me. ''Are you sick?'' He asks, feeling my forehead and nose ''Gail said you didn't eat much.'' He sits down in the chair next to mine.

''I'm fine'' I say barely giving him any attention, still feeling a bit hurt after dinner.

''Okay,'' he sighs shrugging out of his jacket and laying down on the armrest. ''What's wrong?'' He asks as he loosens his tie. ''I've been in a long meeting all afternoon,'' he says when I doesn't answer him.

''You should've called'' I whisper, looking down at the book but I've completely forgotten where I was. ''You could've told me you wouldn't be home.''

He sighs and folds his hands in his lap. ''I'm sorry'' he says and I really want to roll my eyes, I'm really sick of him saying sorry all the time. ''But I didn't have any time, to do that.''

''What about Taylor? Couldn't he call? Someone could've made Sawyer tell me sooner than he did'' I close the book, and look at him. ''Just forget about it.''

''No, you're mad. We're not forgetting about this'' he says looking mad himself. ''I won't let this repeat itself, I promise.'' He stands up from the chair, and holds out his hand for me to take, but I only look questioningly at it, why would I take his hand? ''Have you been to your room yet, after you got home?" He asks and I shake my head. ''Good, come.''

I take his hand, and he interlocks our fingers together as he leads me to my room. Once again we walk past the locked door, but this time both of us look at the door. He turns his head again, and sees me looking. He tries to give me a reassuring smile, but it doesn't reach his eyes. We reach my door, and he motions for me to walk in.

''How?'' I ask, as I open the door and see all the furniture from IKEA that I wrote down on my list, placed around in the room. The room has its sleeping corner, where my bed is, and one corner is my desk, where I can work when I'm home, and I have one reading corner. They have placed the furniture around beautifully, and I don't think I could've done it better myself. I look down at the floor, where there are a few carpets, I didn't pick out any carpets when we were there, but I remember seeing them, so I know they're also from IKEA. I turn around and hug Christian ''thank you'' I whisper.

He is looking at the room, in shock. Maybe he couldn't believe what IKEA furniture could look like. ''You picked well,'' he says still holding me in a hug. I look up at him, and he looks down at me. His eyes look from my eyes, to my nose, and down to lips, before quickly looking up at my eyes again. If I tilt my head a little bit, my lips would be on his. He looks down at my mouth again, before letting me go from the hug. ''I should get something to eat,'' he says and starts to walk out, ''come'' he says to me. ''You should eat more.''

I walk reluctantly after him, but I suddenly feel happy and ready to eat. Plus now I can ask Christian about his day, and about his work, since I don't really know that much about it.


	16. Chapter 16

**CHRISTIAN**

Dinner with Ana last night was… something. No matter how hard I try, I can't figure that girl out. And I do feel bad for hurting her yesterday with not coming home, but I didn't think that it would be a big deal. I often don't come home until very late at night, but I've never had to tell anyone before, so I didn't even think to call and tell Ana.

At dinner though, I could barely eat, because I was too busy answering all her questions. I think she was actually interested in what I had to say, which I found flabbergasting. I find that many times when people ask me about what it is that I do as a CEO, they don't actually care, but Ana was listening intently, and I think that if she had a book next to her, she would've been taking notes. I found that I actually really enjoyed dinner last night; and I enjoyed answering her questions, because I could see she truly cared about what I was saying, which doesn't happen often.

Sighing, I roll out of bed and head for the playroom again. I've been in there every night since Ana moved in. Either late at night or very early in the morning, I find myself sneaking in there to lock the door and looking around some. I know I should tell Ana about my past, and I will tell her, when I'm ready. I've thought about what I would say many times, all the time in fact, and every time the outcome is different. I'm afraid that when I tell her she'll want to move out, and I don't want that. I enjoy having her here, and she makes me laugh.

I think training Ana to be a submissive would be quite an enjoyable task, but I don't think she would agree to it. I thought that when I first met her, which is the reason why I drafted the contract, but now that I know her I'm not that sure anymore. She's too stubborn, too… good. I never really got to know my submissives that well, because I didn't really care to, that's not what our contract was about. But from what I know about them, they could never compare to Ana. First of all, they were all 'yes sir' and 'no sir'. If I ask Ana a question then I will get her honest opinion, no matter how harsh it may be. And I love that about her.

I take the key out of my pocket and unlock the playroom door. As I go to turn the knob and walk in, I hear footsteps behind me and I turn to see Ana's doorknob turning. I quickly close the door, and just in time, as Ana walks out of her room.

''Morning,'' I say, and she jumps slightly and holds her hand to her chest. ''Sorry'' I say walking next to her ''you're up early.''

''Yeah,'' she breathes ''I have a couple interviews today, and I couldn't sleep anymore'' she looks back and frowns, and then she look at me. ''Did you come from…?''

''Oh, I needed some documents from one of the rooms'' I say and her eyes go directly to look my hands, which are empty. Shit! ''I need coffee'' I say walking ahead of her, trying to distract her. I walk down the stairs into the kitchen and head for the coffee machine, and busy myself with the paper, avoiding eye contact with Ana. I did not expect her to be awake this early, especially not if she has interviews. I would've thought that they were closer to noon, rather than 7 am.

She sits down beside me, but doesn't say anything. I sigh. I know I should just tell her now...No not now, I have to go to work and this will take time, which we don't have right now. ''Mrs. Jones, I'll buy something on the way to work, just give whatever you're making to Ana'' I say as I stand up from the chair. She turns around and looks surprised to see that Ana is sitting there. She gives me nod and I meet Taylor in the foyer and take the elevator down to the parking garage.

* * *

><p><strong>ANA<strong>

''Here you go Ana,'' Gail says placing Christian's plate of food in front of me. Its plain toast, scrambled egg and bacon. Gail makes a plate for herself, and joins me at the kitchen bar. ''I can make you something else if you don't want that Ana?'' Gail says when she notices me just staring down at my plate.

''No of course not, this is fine'' I say taking a bite. ''Gail can I ask you something?'' I know I probably shouldn't, but this curiosity is killing me. She nods her head, and looks at me questioningly. ''Well, it's about the locked room. You know the one a few doors from my room?'' I ask, and she nods but looks uneasy. ''What's in that room? Why is it locked?''

''Oh, uhm… I'm not sure'' she says taking a sip of her orange juice. ''It's nothing, just storage, I think.'' She gives me a weak smile, before starting to clear our plates. ''You have 2 interviews today, right?'' She asks, and I nod, still not satisfied with the answer I got. ''Tell me about them,'' she says sitting back down with a cup of coffee in her hands.

I tell her where the interviews are, who I'm meeting, what I'm planning to say, but she doesn't really look interested, rather she looks lost in her thoughts. But I just keep talking to fill the silence that would surround us if I didn't talk.

My first interview is at 10am, but it's the second interview that I am really nervous for. Seattle Independent Publishing is the smaller of the two publishing houses, and I would love to get the job there. Unlike Christian, I don't have a need for everything to be big, I like small, small is good. I like to think that because of the small size, the workplace will be like little community where everyone is friendly and knows everyone. That's what I want for my job, and at a small publishing company, I think that's possible.

After talking to Gail for over an hour, I walk into my room to figure out what I'm going to wear. I didn't want to do it, but I saw the perfect outfit for today in the clothes that Christian bought for me. So I walk into the closet and find everything I need, and promise myself that this is just a onetime occurrence, and just to make sure that this is a onetime thing, I will ask Christian to get rid of the new wardrobe. I do understand that he only wants to be nice, and I appreciate it, but I want him to talk to me about stuff like this, I don't like surprises.

My first interview went really well, it was for a larger company that has offices based throughout the United States. I would be one of many editorial assistants there, and I'm afraid I would just disappear into the crowd of workers at that publishing company. SIP is where I want to be, and I like that they're championing local authors, and they have an interesting and quirky roster of clients.

* * *

><p>I'm sitting in the waiting room, and I feel more nervous now than I did at the other company. The girl behind the reception looks up at me a few times, and gives me a reassuring smile before looking back down at her computer.<p>

''Ana Steele?'' A woman with long black hair standing at the reception desk is looking questioningly at me. She looks to be in her late thirties, or maybe forties.

''Yes,'' I reply and stand up to shake her hand. She gives me a polite smile and introduces herself as Elizabeth Morgan, head of Human Resources. She then leads me towards her office, where I notice a man sitting in one of the chairs. When we enter the office, he stands up and shakes my hand.

''Ana, I'm Jack Hyde, the acquisitions editor here at SIP, and I'm very pleased to meet you,'' he says with an unreadable, but friendly expression. We all sit down, and they both start asking questions. They ask many of the same questions as I got earlier today with the other publishing house, but I feel more determined this time around on my answers. Mr. Hyde gave me a few weird looks and I got a strange vibe around him that I can't explain. And some of his word choices when talking to me were just odd, and maybe even a bit inappropriate.

When the meeting was over, I met with Sawyer outside and we walked over to the car. I feel good about this interview and I think it went really well, so now I just have to cross my fingers and hope for the best.

I look down at my watch and see that it's almost 2pm, I was in there for nearly an hour and a half, I don't know if that's a good thing or bad thing, but at the other company I was only there for about 40 minutes.

As we drive back to Escala, Sawyer asks me how it went. It was nice having a conversation with him that I didn't have to start. We talked a few minutes about my interviews, and then we went on to a completely new subject. I asked him about his family and friends, and he asked the same about me. It was nice. I feel like Sawyer and I could definitely be friends. He also apologized for the way he acted yesterday and said this was all new to him.

* * *

><p>I walk into my bathroom, and took off the clothes I've been wearing all day, in favor of being more comfortable. I'll definitely keep this outfit though, because I liked the way it looked at me. It hugged my body in the right places; whoever bought it did a really good job. I find a pair of sweat pants, and put them on while pulling my hair up into a loose bun and then walk out of my room.<p>

As I walk past the locked door, I notice that it's not completely closed. I know I probably shouldn't, but I walk towards the door and push it open and then quickly walk inside and close the door behind me. The first thing I notice is the weird smell. It's like a mixture of citrus and leather. The room is too dark to see anything, so I feel along the wall to find the light switch. After look for a little while longer, I find it and flick the switch so the light turns on. Then I turn around to see what's in this mysterious room.

_Oh my god._

Almost everything in here is a dark shade of red or a dark burgundy, and the floor is wood. As I walk deeper into the room, my eyes scan around before they land on a large wooden cross, like an X fastened to the wall that is facing the door. It is made of mahogany, just like everything else in this room.

I make a 360 and take in all the ropes, chains, paddles, whips, riding crops, and some feathery implements. I walk over to the mahogany drawers and as I put my hand out to open it, I stop… _Do I really want to know what's in there? _I turn away from the drawers, and see a leather bench sitting in the corner of the room, and beside it is there is an open drawer, which appears to be holding something that looks like wooden canes. I then turn my attention to the bed covered in red leather and red cushions piled at the end.

I then notice a manila envelope sitting on the middle of the bed. I sit down on the bed and reach for the envelope. I feel bad for looking at this, for even being in here, but _holy fuck! _I can clearly see that this is some sort of sex room, but what is all of this? Why didn't he tell me? I open the envelope and take a quick glance at the document in my hands, but look away because this is not meant for me. But I quickly look back when it registered in my mind that I saw my name on this document.

I quickly read through it, and get the gist of what it is saying. It's some sort of contract between me and Christian, where it states that he's a dominant, and I'm a submissive… _what does that even mean? _I read through all the fundamental terms, and what roles we're supposed to have towards each other. I turn page, after page, shocked at what I am seeing. I reach the page that says what is expected of the submissive, when the door opens.

''Ana.''


	17. Chapter 17

**ANA**

''Ana,'' I am startled when I hear my name being whispered. My heart stops, and I drop the papers on the floor and quickly jump to my feet, as I turn and take in Christian's unreadable expression.

''What. The. Fuck, are you doing here?'' He asks angrily, and I can't even get any words out. We stand there staring at each other for a while, while I try to find my voice.

''What,'' I squeak ''is this?'' I ask while I motion around Christian's crazy sex room. He takes a step forward, and on instinct I take a step back. For every step he takes closer to me, I take another step backwards, until I accidentally hit one of the shelves and all of the contents scatter onto the floor. He squats down, and picks up the papers for the weird sex contract from the floor, his eyes still on mine. He puts the document back on the bed, and takes one more step towards me, but this time I can't take another one back.

''Don't be afraid, Ana'' he says holding both his hands up in front of him so as to appear less threatening, ''I'm not gonna hurt you.'' He continues to walk forward until he's right in front of me, and I feel my heart nearly beating out of my chest, and I notice that his breathing is shallow. ''Let me explain this,'' he says and holds out his hand for me to take, but I can' bring myself to hold his hand. I just stare down at his hand, until he finally drops it. I feel the need to get some distance between us. ''I planned on telling you, but just not like this'' he sighs, and starts to walk out of the room. He stops by the door, and waits for me to follow him out. I grab the document and as I exit the room, and he locks it behind me.

''What is this?'' I ask, holding up the sex contract thing, that contains both of our names. I start to look through the papers, and he tries to take them out of my hands, but I pull them away before he can reach them. ''It's mine, it has my name on it'' I spit out, feeling braver out here, than I did in there. Although the look he gives me makes me shrink.

''I'll answer whatever questions you may have, but let's take this into the living room, rather than the hallway,'' he says and I nod in agreement. He starts towards the stairs and I watch him turn the corner and I stop. I stand still for a moment and inhale and exhale a few times to try and compose myself, before walking down the stairs to the living room. Christian is standing by the window looking out over Seattle with a glass of something that looks like scotch. ''What do you think you saw?'' he asks, not looking back at me.

''A torture sex chamber… I… I think you're a sadist'' I say without having to think over it. Does he let people do that to him, why would anyone accept someone doing that to them? He stands still for a moment, and I can see how tense he is. I walk over to the couch, and sit down.

''It's not what you think'' he says after downing his drink, and heading to the bar for a new one.

''So why don't you tell me what it is?'' I ask annoyed, but still cautious.

''Don't'' he says harshly looking back at me. ''I'm so mad at you right now, Anastasia, so _don't_ push me.'' I turn my gaze away from him and stare down at the floor, as he finds a new drink. A few seconds later he is sitting at the other end of the couch. ''You have no reason to be in there, so why the fuck were you?''

''I… it…'' I bow my head when words fail me, the fact that I was curious doesn't really seem like a good enough reason. And I had _nothing _to do in there, so it wasn't really accidental.

''Look at me,'' he says and by the coldness of his voice shocks me, I look up. He narrows his eyes at me, before shaking his head with a sigh ''don't look frightened, Anastasia, I'm not going to harm you, or whatever you're afraid I might do.'' He sets the glass on the table, and I nervously clench the document I have in my hands, as I look at him. ''I'm not a sadist, Anastasia'' I open my mouth to say something, but Christian shoots me an angry glare, so I quickly close it. ''I'm a dominant,'' he says, his eyes a scorching gray and incredibly intense.

''Wh… what does that mean?'' I whisper. He sighs and moves down the couch to get closer to me.

''It means that I like woman to surrender themselves to me, in all ways.'' He says, and images of different women being tied up in that red room flashes in my mind.

"So you do it to other, they don't do that to you?"

"Yes."

''Why would anyone want to do that?''

''To please me. I don't do anything they don't like or don't wanna do. It is consensual… Did you read parts of the contract?'' he asks, and I pull my feet under me on the sofa and nod. ''I have rules, and I want them to comply with those rules. I want _you_ to comply with them'' he says and my eyes go wide as I swallow loudly, and a ghost of a smile tugs at his lips. ''If the rules are followed to my satisfaction, I will reward you, if not, I shall punish you, and you _will_ learn to follow the rules.'' When I don't say anything, he continues to talk. ''It's ultimately about gaining trust and respect, those are important things in a BDSM relationship, Anastasia.''

''I don't understand,'' I whisper and he cocks his head to the side and frowns. ''Why would I, or anyone else, let you punish me? Harm me?''

''I would never inflict more than you could take, I would never harm you intentionally. I would only punish you if I had to, and yes, it would be painful, but how else are you supposed to learn? The contract is for us to be clear on what is acceptable and what is not, it's something we would have to discuss further for both of our safety.'' I don't like the way he says we, or you, like I am automatically going to be a part of this.

''How did you become like this?'' He thinks about it for a while, probably deciding whether or not he should tell me, but after a few minutes of deliberation, he leans back on the couch with a sigh.

''A friend of my mother's introduced me to the lifestyle.'' he lets out a low chuckle when he sees my surprised, and somewhat disgusted face. ''I don't discuss that with anyone, but since you asked, I felt that I should tell you.''

''How many have there been?'' I blurt out. I wonder how many women have let him take them up to that room, and let him do unthinkable things to –with– them?

''15.'' Wow. That's not as many as I thought, but still, that's quite a lot of women. It doesn't really feel good hearing the amount of women he's had, considering I have no experience and have only been with one man.

''And how did these contracts work? Did they all live here?'' I ask, and he nods. ''With you?''

''Not _with_ me, but they did have a room that they would stay in when they were here, from Friday until Sunday.'' He says, and I remember Gail telling me that Christian didn't want her to work on weekends, and now I understand why. He didn't want her around his sex slaves.

''Which room did they stay in then?''

''The room you're currently occupying'' he says and yet again my eyes widen in shock. My room? He placed me in the same room he placed all of these other women? His girlfriends? God only knows what kinds of STD's may lie in between those sheets. ''Ana?'' he says after I have been silent for a few minutes. I jump to my feet and start walking over to the stairs. ''Where are you going?''

''I don't want to stay in that room, Christian'' I say and I see him rush after me. ''I want to change rooms immediately'' he tugs on my elbow gently to stop me. ''Why would you put me in there?'' I ask in a half cry and half scream. ''Is that what you see me as? Am I just another one of your sex slaves? Christian, you should've told me all this, before I moved in with you!'' I shake him off me and start to walk up the stairs again. ''I don't want to sleep there anymore, I want to change rooms.''

''We can do that, of course we can do that Ana. But can we please finish this discussion first? We really need to finish it,'' he says and I nod as he leads me over to the kitchen bar. He walks over to the sink and returns with a glass of water that he hands me. ''Drink.''

''Do you want that with me?'' I ask, after taking a big gulp of the water.

''I did, and I still do in some ways'' I frown and he sighs before continuing. ''I had the contract drafted because I wanted that with you. It's the only relationships that I have. I had planned on talking to you about it, but then the whole marriage thing happened… I wanted that with you because I was attracted to you, and I thought that you would make a great sub, or at least that was the first impression you gave me… But that was before I knew how inexperienced you were, well, are. I didn't know you were a virgin, how the fuck, were you a virgin? You're beautiful, Ana, why haven't you done it before.'' I'm shocked at the turn of direction this conversation has gone in; I look down at my glass of water and blush.

''Were your girlfriends pretty?'' The second the question is out of my mouth he starts to pace and shoots me an irritated and annoyed glare.

''Subs, Ana. Not girlfriends.'' he asks sounding madder than he did before. ''And why the fuck do you care what they looked like? What's it to you? It's none of your damn business'' he says, while still glaring at me.

''Did they look like me'' I whisper, afraid of his answer.

After waiting for a while with no response, he sighs and whispers, ''yes.'' He finally looks at me when he hears my gasp, ''they were petite brunettes, just like you Ana.'' So that's the reason he wanted to spend time with me. It wasn't because he was interested in me, like I first thought; it was just because I looked like all his former subs, and he wanted to make me one. I feel sick.

''I… I…'' I say stumbling to my feet. ''I need some time alone, please. I need to think about… everything'' I say walking over to the stairs again, blinking away a few tears that are threatening to fall. ''I need Kate.''

''Okay, go visit her if that's what you need, Ana, but I need to remind you that you've signed an NDA, and you can't discuss this with anyone.'' I exhale slowly, grateful to him that he's at least not trying to make me stay. Not that he could've made me if he tried, but I don't want to anger him more. I nod at him and walk to my room to find my cell phone.

* * *

><p><strong>CHRISTIAN<strong>

The talk went better than I first thought that it would, but it wasn't supposed to happen like this. I was ready to tell her, but I wanted to do it my way. I thought about how to talk to her all day and I finally figured out how to do it without scaring her, then this shit happens. When I first saw her in my Playroom, she seemed shocked, scared, and hurt. I think that towards the end she may have looked less scared and hurt, maybe even a little curious about my lifestyle, but also rather angry.

She said she needed time, which I will gladly give her, as this information can be quite a shock. I do however wish that she didn't want to leave Escala in order to think. But I won't stop her from leaving, as if she would even let me suggest that.

I walk over to the couch to retrieve the contract, and walk into my home office to put it back in the drawer. I sit down in my chair, and exhale loudly. The shock I felt when I noticed where she was, god I never want to feel like that again. First, I knocked gently on her door to see if she was there, but it was empty. Then I walked to the library, but that was empty too. I panicked a little bit, but then figured that she was probably just in the bathroom.

All day I had worried about the playroom being unlocked. I had this feeling this morning when Taylor was driving me to GEH that I forgot to lock it, and it was nagging at me all day. So when I got home, I decided to check to see if I remembered to lock it. I gently turned the doorknob to find it unlock, then I opened the door even more and to my greatest surprise, saw that the lights were on, and Ana was sitting on the bad, with the manila envelope in her hands. My heart nearly stopped and I immediately felt sick. But the worst thing was the fact that when I approached her, she looked so scared and then tried to get away from me. When the shelf with all the whips on it fell and scattered all over the floor, it actually looked like she would cry.

I never want to see that look on Ana's face ever again. In that moment, all I wanted to do was take her into my arms, stroke her hair and whisper that everything will all be okay over and over again until she wasn't scared anymore.

* * *

><p><strong>ANA<strong>

''I'm all for getting manicure and pedicure with my best friend,'' Kate starts as we sit down in the chairs at the beauty salon. ''but you hate this stuff. I always have to drag you in here with me, why the sudden change?''

''Maybe I just want to spend time with you'' I say sweetly and grab one of the magazines to try and distract Kate from her inquisition.

''Mmmhmmm, yeah I don't believe you,'' she says narrowing her eyes at me ''but I'm not complaining.'' I let out a silent sigh of relief when she also picks up one of the magazines, and doesn't try to interrogate me further. ''What do you wanna do after this? Shopping?'' She asks, wishfully.

''We could do that,'' I say. ''But I want a hair cut first'' she nods and smiles at me, before looking back at the magazine. Kate's picked out a neon pink color for her toenails and a softer pink for her finger nails. I would never dare to pick such bold colors, so I end up with a soft beige color on my toes and a French manicure for my fingers.

It takes about 30 minutes before we're all finished, and we walk out of the salon as Kate keeps looking down at her hands, saying over and over again how pleased she is with the manicure, and that we should definitely go back there some time. ''Where, do you want to cut your hair?'' She asks, and I shrug. I don't know any places around here. ''I want to trim my hair, too. I know the perfect place.''

Kate drags me to this cute little hair dresser, at the corner of a few clothing stores. I'm surprised she picked this one, as we've walked past a few salons that looked really popular, which is where Kate normally likes to go. We walk in, and they have time for both of us, and we're led to a couple chairs in the back after only waiting a few minutes.

''What do you want?'' The lady asks, dragging her fingers through my hair and starts combing it.

'' I want a change… something new.''


	18. Chapter 18

**ANA**

''Anastasia, what did you do?'' I turn around to see a shocked Christian standing in the doorway to the hall. After a few hours out with Kate I return home a new person. We went shopping after we left the hair dresser, I loved that place and I think I'll definitely go back. Today was the first time ever I bought a completely new wardrobe without looking at the price tags. I know I'll pay for that later, but I needed a new image. And hopefully I'll have a job soon, so I can start paying off my student loans. ''Anastasia!'' Christian says louder this time to get my attention.

''Oh,'' I said touching my hair, running my fingers through it. ''I cut it,'' I say.

''I can see that… You're blond!'' he says after a beat, walking towards me. This time I stand my ground and don't back away, I'm tired of being poor little shy Ana, and maybe this new hair will make me feel a bit different. He stops right in front of me and touches my hair. ''It doesn't even reach your shoulders,'' he says wide eyed, I shrug and step out of his reach. We stay there staring at each other, ''you had such a beautiful hair'' he sighs and walks away.

That was weird; I stare at Christian's back as he returns to wherever he came from. I hear the sound of a door getting slammed shut and I jump slightly. I walk upstairs and head for my room, ready to grab my stuff out of there and transfer it into a new room. I pull as much of my hair as I can into a ponytail, which will definitely take some time getting used to, but I don't regret it. I open the door slowly, and I'm met with an empty room. All of my stuff isn't in the bedroom anymore. I continue my perusal of the room and then walk into the bathroom to find that all my stuff from in there is also gone. My final stop is in the walk in closet, and I again find that like everything else, it's empty.

As I start my walk back downstairs, I can't help myself, I stop outside the door. The door to the room that ruined everything, and I try to turn the doorknob, but of course it's locked. I start downstairs again, but on my way to Christian's office I run into Gail.

''Oh,'' she says in a shocked voice when she takes a look at me. ''I nearly didn't recognize you'' she says with a nervous laugh. ''It is so beautiful, Ana. That color really suits you,'' I smile at her as she touches my hair with one of her hands.

''Thank you… I need to find Christian'' I say as I look behind her.

''Of course, I have things to do as well. When do you want dinner, dear?''

''I ate out with Kate today, so I don't really need more food today, but thank you,'' she smiles and nods as she walks past me to continue with whatever she was doing. I walk over to Christian's office, but stop when I hear him scream to someone.

''Don't you dare, Elena!'' He shouts into what I am guessing is a phone, since I don't think there was anyone here when I got home, but I'm not exactly sure. There's silence for a little while and I gently knock on the door. When he doesn't answer the door, I slowly begin to open it. ''What?'' He snarls at me without looking up.

''Um,'' I say while awkwardly standing in the doorway, ''I'm sorry, I'll…'' I say when I notice his expression softening when he looks up at me. ''I'll just go, I didn't mean to interrupt anything.''

''Why?'' He asks as I turn around. When I turn back around, I see that he looks so sad and a little bit lost. He stands up and walks towards me, stopping right in front of me once again. ''Why would you do that to your hair, Ana?'' He runs his hands through it and a look of sadness, and maybe a little bit of disgust, appears on his beautiful face.

''I, uhm, well I…'' didn't want to look like your sex slaves, is what I really want to say. But, I don't want to admit _that_was the reason behind my new hairstyle. I should've changed the hair for me, not because of Christian or anyone else. Even though I don't regret changing it, I do regret the reason behind the change.

''I didn't want you to do that because of the subs,'' he says taking his hand back. He motions towards the seating area in his office and I follow him and sit down on the couch. We sit there awkwardly staring at each other for a little while, neither of us really knowing what to say or do.

''I won't be your submissive,'' I say when the silence eventually gets to be too much for me. ''It's not something I can do.''

''No it's not,'' he says and a ghost of a smile tugs at his lips, ''you have too many strong opinions, I admire that about you though.'' He says while giving me a full and adorable Christian Grey smile, and I can't help but to smile back at him. ''All your stuff is moved,'' he says folding his hands in his lap ''if you're not happy with the new guest room, we can always change it again.''

''Okay, thanks… I'm your wife'' I say suddenly and his eyebrows shoot up ''I want us to live here as equals, talk to each other, trust each other, and if you can't give me that, then these 5 and a half months won't work out for us.''

He nods at me and we go back to just looking at each other. Every few seconds, Christian get's this frown on his face, like he's trying really hard to work something out in his head. Christian raises his hand to my face and gently strokes my chin, and I immediately close my eyes, enjoying his hand on my face. I open my eyes and Christian is staring intensely at me, and starts to lean forward slowly and I find myself leaning towards him too. When we're only inches apart, he opens his lips slightly.

There's a loud knock on the door, and we both break apart before anything happens. Even though nothing happened, I can't stop blushing as Taylor appears in the doorway. ''Sorry, sir, but Mrs. Lincoln is on her way up.''

''Mother fucker,'' he mutters under breath. He stands up and before he leaves the room he turns around to me, ''please just stay here, I'll deal with this'' before he shuts the office door. I let out a shaky breath and lean back onto the couch.

I feel dirty, I was about to kiss my husband, and somehow I feel dirty. I want to kiss him; I want to kiss the Christian Grey that's a sweet man who I see glimpses of every now and then. Not Christian Grey the CEO billionaire or Christian Grey the Dominant. But, I'm afraid that the one I want doesn't come without the others. This will only be messier in the end if I let my lust for him take over, it's wrong and I know it.

I sit there alone in his office for awhile, making rules up in my head of what I'm allowed to do and what I'm not allowed to do when it comes to Christian, or my newly discovered horny needs. I never had them when I was a virgin, but now that I know what the big deal is about sex, I want it. And I only want it with one man.

* * *

><p>When I get bored of just sitting in here, I stand up and leave the office, but am stopped in my tracks when I hear two angry voices. I try to get closer to the voices without being seen. I at first only hear a lot of mumbling, and I can't really make out the words, but then I clearly hear, ''Divorce her!'' I stay still and wait for Christian to say something to the angry woman yelling. Is she his former girlfriend or rather a former sub perhaps?<p>

''All in good time, Elena now calm the fuck down'' he says harshly.

''Do you know what it did to me to hear from your mother that you had gotten married to some gold digging whore?''

''Don't you dare'' he says harshly, and no matter how mad he's been at me, he's never spoken to me in that voice. It makes me want to run and hide away from him. ''She's not what you think she is.''

''Oh my god!'' She whines, ''what has she done to you. Since when do you talk to me like this? Since when do you act like… like you're in love?'' She asks, and my heart stops.

''I'm not in love,'' he says ''but I will not have you talk bad about her'' he says and I sigh, feeling relived and hurt all at the same time. I walk forward a little bit, and the woman he was talking to sees me. All I can do now is continue walking forward as if I was already on my way to the area where they were fighting. I walk past them and head into the kitchen, I can still see them from this spot, but I think it is believable that I would be in here because I was thirsty.

I fill up my glass, and I feel both their eyes directed at me. I take a sip of water before turning around facing them. ''I'm sorry for interrupting, I was thirsty,'' I say while holding up my glass. Christian directs a nervous smile at me, and the woman, who I'm assuming is Elena, glares at me. ''Um, I'll just take it to my room,'' I start to walk up to my room when I remember that I don't know where it is. Not wanting to embarrass myself in front of her, I start walking towards Christian's room and then stop when I know I'm out of sight.

''She's blond,'' Elena says, much calmer now ''and she has short hair.''

''It's dyed'' Christian explain, ''but yes for the moment she's blonde, and she has short hair, and I think she looks lovely.'' At his words, I can't stop the smile spreading across my face.

''She doesn't look like you're usual type.''

''Maybe that's a good thing,'' he says.

''Ah, easier divorcing her?'' She asks.

''No that's not what I meant… Elena what are you even doing here, except threatening me?'' Threatening him? Did she threaten him? Why hasn't he kicked her out yet? I always thought Christian is one of those 'no bullshit' type of guys.

''That's the method that works best for you'' she purrs at him, ''do you remember that time we…'' When the realization on where this conversation was going and the realization as to whom this woman really is, I quickly walk away towards Christian bedroom.

That's the woman, his mom's friend, the one who seduced him and tricked him into that lifestyle. He wouldn't be in it if it wasn't for her. And he's still talking with her? Seeing her? Do they still have a sexual relationship? It seems like she has some sort of power over him, if she can threaten him without him going batshit crazy.

But why would he still be in contact with her? What she did to him was illegal, and wrong on so many levels, so why is he in contact with this Mrs. Robinson?


	19. Chapter 19

**CHRISTIAN**

When I'm finally able to get Elena to leave, I head to my room to find Ana. I saw that she struggled with where she was going to go, after getting a glass of water, as I never showed her where her new room is. So she headed for my room, and surprisingly, I don't care. When I walk past Taylor in the hall I shoot him an exasperated sigh and he chuckles.

As I push the door to my bedroom open, I see Ana lying on the covers, asleep. I smile at the sight of her, and then walk over and carefully take the covers out from underneath her and wrap it around her. She stirs slightly but doesn't wake up.

I walk into my closet and get a pair of pajama bottoms and then go into my bathroom to take a shower. The fact that Ana is lying sprawled across my bed isn't going to stop my nightly shower routine. I walk into the shower, and let out a sigh when the hot water hits my beck. Unashamedly, my hand goes straight to my erection, as I pump slowly up and down.

Before when I masturbated, it was always to images of women tied up in my playroom, and me doing different things to them. That was what always got me off, well before Ana. Now, every time, my mind wanders to Ana. I see the lazy satisfied smile on her face, as she lies beneath me. I feel her lips on mine; I really miss her lips on mine. I start stroking faster and faster, as pictures of Ana coming, swarm around in my head.

I let out a deep groan when I come, and I want so badly to say her name, but I don't. I can't take the risk that the shower didn't wake her up, for all I know she might be standing outside the door, listening.

* * *

><p>As I emerge from the bathroom, in a pair of pajama bottoms while drying my hair with a towel, I see that Ana is still fast asleep. I throw the towel back into the bathroom, before closing the door. I walk over to the bed, and start to gently push Ana, so that she's only lying on one side of the bed, and not the whole bed.<p>

I hover over her, and I can't help but lean in and press a gentle kiss to her lips. She lets out a soft sigh, but doesn't wake up. Leaning down once more, I kiss her again; I press down a little bit more this time, but am careful not to wake her up. As I lean back, I feel like such a creep. Soon I'll probably be lurking in the dark hoping to get a look at her naked. What's wrong with me? I feel so sexually frustrated, it's clearly making me insane.

Every time something has happened between us, sex, a kiss, or even a hug, she's freaked out; talking about what a mistake it was. I don't consider any of our kisses a mistake, or the times we've hugged or had sex. So I don't know why she thinks of them that way.

I roll over on my side of the bed, and lay there, watching her sleep. Her hair is tangled in every direction, and her mouth parted as she breaths in and out in heavy breaths. The shock and horror that went through me when I first saw her hair, is indescribable. I felt all these emotions; anger, sadness, disappointment, although a little part of me was happy. It made me glad that I could distance Ana from the subs, because her looks were so different, if that makes sense.

The first thing I compared Ana's hair to, was Elena. But after looking at her for a long time, and then seeing Elena, their hair can't even be compared. Elena is plain old platinum blonde. Ana's hair on the other side is interesting; it's a warm golden blonde color, with a hint of ginger in it. The color actually suits her, the length of her hair is what I have a problem with. I've always preferred long hair; I don't know why I just have.

I turn my back to Ana with a sigh, and fall asleep.

* * *

><p><strong>ANA<strong>

I wake up to the loudest alarm, known for mankind. With a grunt I sit up in bed and look for the source of the sound. I look around quickly, but I don't recognize the room, or furniture in here. I look over at the night stand where the alarm is blaring off, and see that it's only 6 am in the morning. I start to lean toward it, but stop when I get a sight of Christian stirring beside me. He rubs his eyes for a few seconds, looking confused and totally adorable.

No, Ana remember the rules, you made 2 good rules yesterday, now keep them! I sigh, and he immediately sits up and looks at me with a little smile tugging in the corner of his lips. ''Good morning, Anastasia'' he says stretching his arms, giving me a perfect view to his abs. ''Sleep well,'' he asks.

''I didn't mean to fall asleep,'' I murmur, I start to get out of bed when I see the clothes I wore yesterday in a pile on the chair beside the bed. I look down and see that I'm wearing Christian's t shirt, and under that only my panties. ''Where's my room?''

''I'll show you, just give me a few minutes to wake up'' he says lying back down. But he doesn't close his eyes, instead he lays there looking up at me.

''Why are you staring,'' I ask as I lay down beside him. He shrugs, but doesn't stop staring. ''So…'' I say feeling slightly uncomfortable, but I'm full of questions that I want answered. ''That was Mrs. Robinson'' I say more as a statement than a question, although it was meant to be a questions. He frowns at me, ''your moms friend? The one who seduced you?''

''Ah,'' he says with a humorous smile on his face ''hmmm I like that, Mrs. Robinson'' he says testing the name, he looks over at me and his smile fades as he sees that I'm not impressed. ''Yes, that was she.''

''You still have contact with her? After everything she's done to you?''

''Yes, we're friends'' he says matter of factly, and I snort.

''And you let her threaten you? You let her treat you poorly, for god knows how long when you were younger, and now you believe you're friends, when she's actually just manipulating you? Are you really that stupid?'' I ask and his face hardens.

''Don't speak of things you don't know, or understand, Anastasia'' he says harshly. ''But you heard that huh?''

''Yes, I heard that, then I left, when she tried to _seduce_ you again.''

''She likes to bring up old times,'' he says turning away so that he's staring at the ceiling. ''But we haven't had a sexual relationship for 6 years, so she wasn't trying to seduce me.''

''What was she threatening you about?''

''Divorcing you,'' he says and looks sideways at me to gauge my reaction. ''She claims she has videos of me, and she uses them to get her will, I don't believe that she has any videos but I'm not taking a chance on that one. I've been through her computers, but I can't find a trace of them, but she's a smart lady she may have other ways to hide them from me,'' he says with a sigh of frustration. ''She says she's going to release it, if I don't divorce you.''

''Why,'' I whisper hoarsely.

''She likes control, she has a need to have control over me, and I've let her all these years.'' He says sitting up, looking down at me. ''She's picked out subs for me, since our relationship ended. I always confide in her when it comes to certain things. But this'' he says motioning between us, ''is out of her control, she had nothing to do with it, and it pisses her off… So she demanded that I divorce you.''

''Are you'' I whisper again.

''I can't, remember?'' He says, giving me a weak smile. ''I'll give you a few minutes to get ready, then I'll show you to your room'' he says standing up and walks towards the bathroom. As soon as the door closes to the bathroom, I stand up and take of his shirt and quickly put mine on again.

He walks out a few minutes later, still only wearing his pajama pants. Was he just sitting in there, giving me time to get dressed? I can't help the smile that appears on my face, as I imagine Christian just sitting there waiting on the toilet lid.

''What're you smiling about?'' He asks, walking towards me.

''Nothing,'' I say as I turn around and walk for the door. As he gets near me, he tried to hold me around my waist, but I walk out of his grasp. ''Uh uh'' I say holding up my hands. ''I've made a couple of rules, and I'm not going to fail them on the first day.''

''Rules?'' he asks, looking confused. Then he just gets an annoyed look on his face, ''let's hear them, then.''

''Okay,'' I say as we stop in the hall way, I suddenly feel embarrassed by them. ''First, no kissing, hugging, sex or any physical contact'' I say and his eyebrows shoot up ''you aren't allowed within a 3 foot radius of me.'' I say while taking a step away from him. I don't think he finds this rule funny, he actually looks rather pissed.

''The next?''

''That's… ehm, personal'' I say blushing, since the next rule is to stop checking Christian out or lust after him, which I already have failed at today. ''It was actually only the first one, I want to keep this from getting messy Christian, so you're not allowed to touch me.'' He takes a few steps closer to me, and leans in so that we're nose to nose.

''Why can't I kiss you, princess?'' He asks, and my heart nearly stops. ''Shit, Ana'' he says but I can't look at him, everything is fading away around me. ''Are you okay?'' I can hear him calling for Taylor, and then I fall.

* * *

><p>I hear a really annoying beeping sound. I open my eyes, but close them again quickly because of the bright light. I feel someone clutching my hand, and a voice saying. ''Ana, everything is fine, everything will be fine.'' I recognize Christian's voice, and it makes me feel safe, so I relax. I realize that the beeping sound is only in my head. ''Can you hear me Ana?'' he asks ''if you can, squeeze my hand'' I try my hardest to squeeze it, and he lets out a sigh ''thank god.''<p>

''Lights'' I murmur, he let's go of my hands and then I see through my eyelids that the light is no longer as strong, so I open my eyes again. Christian sits back down beside me, and takes my hand in his. I look around, and I see that I'm back in Christian's bed.

''Hi,'' he says looking down at me. ''You scared me there,'' he says looking sadly at me. ''What happened?'' I shake my head not wanting to talk about it. ''Ana,'' he says leaning forward in the chair ''I didn't mean to get so close to you, I didn't know it would make you uncomfortable.'' He says with a sad and apologetic smile.

''No, it wasn't you'' I say hoarsely. Christian reaches for a glass of water on the night stand and gives it to me, ''thank you.'' I drink the whole glass before handing it back to him. ''It was what you called me,'' I say wanting him to understand that he didn't do anything wrong. ''It just took me by surprise.''

''Princess'' he whisper, and I flinch ''why would that upset you?'' I shake my head again, not ready to start talking about what happened in Texas before Ray got to me. ''Ana, when I met your father, he said something to me'' he says and my eyes widen in horror, did he tell Christian about Stephen, thinking he knew about it? ''He said that you didn't have it easy growing up, and that you've been through enough pain. What did he mean by that?'' When I doesn't answer he sighs, ''take your time Ana, but please tell me,'' he pleads.

''The last man who called me that,'' I say not looking at him ''didn't treat me well,'' I whisper and I already feel tears start to form in my eyes. I hate talking about this, and I hate thinking about it, thinking that he may be doing that to others. I feel Christian's thumb under my eye, and I realize that he's drying away my tears.

He stands up and walks over to the other side of the bed. He sits down and lifts me so that I'm sitting between his legs on the bed, and I rest my head on his shoulder, as he holds me tight. ''Tell me what happened, baby'' he whisper soothingly.

''The last time I saw him'' I say as I try to stay calm ''he had ripped of my shirt, and pinned me to the floor while he was undoing his pants.'' I feel Christian tense behind me, as he hold onto me tighter.

''Did, he rape you'' he asks through gritted teeth.

I shake my head ''no, that was the first time things went that far'' I say as a sob escapes my mouth. ''My dad came, he came just in time'' I say as new tears starts to stream down my face.

''Who was he?''

''My mom's third husband'' I say and he tenses even more ''his name was Stephen Morton.''

I can hear Christian hiss something through his clenched teeth, but I don't hear what. ''What did he do to you?'' he whispers, starting to stroke up and down my arms in a soothing way.

''Their marriage started of fine, I guess. My mom seemed happy, which made me happy. I knew she had cheated on Ray, since I caught her a couple times. I didn't believe their marriage would last, and early on I was prepared to move again, when she got bored with him… After a few weeks, I understood that he had a bad temper, and that it didn't take much for him to lash out, and when he got angry, he would hit my mother.'' I wipe away new tears, as I remember back to that short period of my life when I lived in Texas.

''My mom went away on a business meeting, I think she just wanted to get away from him, but she left me there all alone with him'' I say, and once again Christian tenses up. ''I tried to stay in my room, I didn't want to be near him, I was so scared of him… He had been drinking'' I say after a few inhales and exhales, and I feel Christian kiss the back top of my head. ''He came into my room, and sat down on my bed. I was laying there under the covers in my pajamas, trying to sleep… H-he leaned down and kissed my cheek, telling me that I was the prettiest princess he had ever seen. Then he left.

''He kept calling me that for a week, that's how long my mom was gone. But he didn't do anything to me while my mother was gone, so I was less and less scared of him. Then one night he knocked on my door, telling me how much he missed his princess, that he needed me to make him feel good.'' I shake my head, to clear it. ''I'm so stupid,'' I cry ''I was 16 for crying out loud, I knew better, I knew what was happening and I was old enough to get help. But I didn't.''

''None of this is your fault Ana'' Christian whisper in my hair, not stopping the comforting stroking of my arm. ''You were scared, you didn't know who you could talk to, that's understandable. _He_ is the one to blame here, _he_ knew better, yet _he_ wanted to do horrible stuff to you.''

''I know,'' I say drying more tears ''but I just wish I did something… The day after he made me'' I say taking in a deep breath, before slowly letting out. ''The day after he made me touch him, I tried to stay farther and farther away from him. I stayed as late as I could at school, before I walked home, which took over an hour, but it only made him angrier, that I wasn't around more. Every night for 2 weeks he came in and undid his pants, and made me do things to him that I didn't want to do. And then when he was satisfied, he would start touching me, mostly my breasts.''

I let out a humorless laugh ''he told me I should find myself a rich husband, so that he could pay me for a pair of real boobs.'' Christian's hold on me tightens even more. But I don't feel scared, I feel safe in his arms. ''I called Ray, and begged him to take me home, I didn't tell him what had happened, but it was like he knew, like he could hear it in my voice. Then a week later, I was back in Montesano.''

''God baby'' Christian breaths out, he lifts me up so that I can turn around, and he crushes me to his chest as he hugs me tightly. He leans back to look at me, and I can see that he also has tears formed in his eyes. Christian starts to open his mouth to say something, but I lean forward and peck his lips, and then I lean back biting my lip. He looks in my eyes, shocked, before he leans forward and gives me another peck, and then he looks in my eyes to see my reaction. He slowly leans forward and gives me another peck, and then another peck.

Then he takes my face in his hands, and crushes his lips to mine, as he slowly and gently kisses me. I try licking his bottom lip for entrance to his mouth, but he doesn't open it. Instead he continues to kiss my lips gently and look into my eyes.


End file.
